(Closed) anyone else here have no one to go dress shopping w/?

posted 10 years ago in Dress
Post # 3
Member
1423 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2009

I was kind of in the same boat.  I’m fairly new to where I live and my mom and close friends are a 16+ hour drive away.  My friends here are intellectual and not very girly — so I would have felt silly trying on poofy wedding gowns with them.  Luckily one of my good friends from back home put a good use to her frequent flier miles and came to visit and take me shopping!  Maybe you’ll be pleasantly surprised, too.  If not, going it alone may not be too bad, especially if you’re opinionated.  You can always find pics of the dresses you like and email them to get feedback and help you narrow it down.  (That’s what I’m doing at the moment.)  It’ll still be fun.  Nothing like a pretty dress to cheer you up!

Post # 4
Member
159 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2008

The very first time I went dress shopping I went alone. I just wanted to feel things out without the opinions of tons of people. I wanted to avoid coming out in my dream dress and having my mom and Maid/Matron of Honor just look at me unapprovingly. Side note: has that happened to anyone?

I would say go on your own but take pics and videos if you can so those who are close to you but not close to you (get it?) can go virtual shopping with you. And even better…you don’t have to share the unflattering dresses that you for sure don’t want! Super bonus of going on yor own. 

This might be a little out there but if you wanted to share your location, I am sure you could find a few bees from the hive that would love to join you! We all know that the bees are always up for some good dress shopping. Am I right, girls?

Post # 5
Member
244 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2008

for the same reasons (friends far away), I did almost all of my dress shopping alone (i went home one weekend and did some with my mom/sisters). It was fine…I guess it depends on your personalty but I didn’t think it was depressing at all and it really lets you decide what YOU like.  Now if you are indecisive or you feel kind of insecure doing anything alone it might be a different situation. 

FYI, though, most bridal stores will not let you take pictures/videos…but if you explain the situation they might bend the rules.  

Post # 6
Member
801 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2008

I went dress shopping alone and really enjoyed it.  As others have stated, you get the to make the decision of what you like without outside influence (other than a salesperson).  The first time seemed a bit awkward until I started trying on dresses but after that, it really didn’t feel weird at all.

I’m definitely glad I went without my mom though.  She’s really not a big fan of my veil (and I don’t get warm fuzzies about my dress either).  But it’s what I want and what makes me feel like a bride so . . . stand your ground when you find "the one".  It’s about you, no one else.

You can narrow down your likes and then find pictures online (if they don’t let you take them in store) and send those to your important people to get their weigh in if you are still indecisive.

 

Post # 7
Member
88 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: March 2009

I had the exact same issues. I felt like I was inconviencing some of my friends (they ALL have kids) and a few of my other friends are a lil’ bitter about marriage (they have kids with their boyfriends, even live with them but their boyfriends don’t want to get married) so I didn’t want to even ask them. I did my dress shopping online first and narrowed it down to dresses I liked then found stores that carried them.

The first time I went store dress shopping I took along a girl I barely knew. LoL. She was a girlfriend of one of my FI’s friends. But she was excited to go with me and I was excited not to go alone. LoL. The second time I went out I took my Fiance with me. Yep, you heard me right…my Fiance saw me in wedding dresses. He even saw me in a dress that I ended up buying, but our wedding is soooo far out, I can guarentee you that he won’t remember what the dress even looked like by the wedding day. I liked having him with me and knowing that the dress I picked out is something he likes.

Post # 8
Member
2324 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2018

When I got married, I went with my mother and it was horrible. She is way too opinionated. I ended up eloping, so I didn’t wear a dress anyway. Now that we’re renewing our vows, I’m going to NYC next week and I’m going to do my dress shopping without her. My husband might go with me one day, but he’s super busy the whole time we’re there, so I might be all on my own. I’m so HAPPY.

Post # 9
Member
1061 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2008

I went dress shopping alone for the first time for the same reasons. It was really nice — I got to see exactly what looked good and what didn’t without the commentary from the peanut gallery. It made my dress search alot more focused and more pleasant when the time came to go with other people.

Post # 10
Member
10 posts
Newbee

I have 9 bridemaids!  and the majority of the dress shopping I did was alone!   As much as I love my bridemaids we are all very different and very different styles and I didn’t want that to deter from from my loving a dress and feeling that it’s "the one"  And I think sales people like you much better if you go alone, they are more attentive if you don’t have a whole gaggle of girls saying all kind of stuff.  This is what I did…. I went dress shopping… only taking pictures of dresses I liked.  Then at the end of the day I emailed the pics out to my girls (many of mine are outoftown as well)  and then I still go to share the experience and had them help me pick a dress.

Post # 11
Member
35 posts
Newbee

I wish that I had gone alone, it ended up working out just fine to go with a group but they really had a lot of sway over my choice.  In fact when I look back at the pictures I had narrowed it down to two and I HATE the other one I had narrowed it down to!  It fit well and was very flattering on me but I just love the one I ultimately picked.  I tend to prefer shopping on my own and mulling things over on my own schedule. 

One thing I found though is that I had all sorts of random people mention to me that they would go shopping with me.  It came up at lunch at work one day that I still needed to go dress shopping and like 3 people asked to come along!  Maybe just start talking about it a lot and see who offers!  

I also like the idea of going with bees from your area!  That could be so much fun! 

Post # 12
Member
25 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2009

<font face=”Times New Roman” size=”3″>I don’t have anyone either. I’m a Montrealer living in England getting married in Scotland and I really haven’t made any friends in my area.  I went dress shopping two times and I think I’ve found the one but want a second opinion, or at the very least, to be able to try on the dress again before making up my mind.  I’m hesitating on going again because I’m starting to feel silly and doubtful of my feelings about this dress.  I went dress shopping with my future SIL and she was great, but unfortunately, she doesn’t know me so well AND the shop didn’t stock the dress I liked.  I’ve wrestled with loneliness for the 10 months I’ve been living here and I wish I had someone who knows me to help with this important decision.  Ack, trying to remain unemotional about this whole thing…</font>

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Post # 13
Member
267 posts
Helper bee

Oh, me too! I went to the Filene’s Running of the Brides sale, and was supposed to have a coworker and a friend go with me– the coworker got stuck in a meeting and the friend just FORGOT, so I had to go alone! (sigh) I didn’t end up finding anything there anyway, and did the rest of my shopping either alone or with an aunt and a cousin.

It’s not so bad going alone, you can try on whatever you want without having to worry about what other people will think or say, but take pictures so you can get second opinions!

Post # 14
Member
52 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2008

I am in the same situation, but I actually wanted to go alone.

I didn’t want anyone with me to tell me things they thought I wanted to hear, and I knew that there wasn’t anyone I could bring that would give me a completely unbiased opinion.

There were always other ladies there with their girlsfriends, sisters, and/or mothers, but I knew that I wasn’t one of those brides that wanted all of that attention. Especially when I just wanted to really focus on each dress and figure out what I like or didn’t like.

 

Post # 15
Member
45 posts
Newbee

I was in the same boat and went alone and thought it was still super fun! But maybe you can have your mom come for a visit and do a weekend of serious dress shopping?

Post # 16
Member
25 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2009

My mom may come for a visit, but I’m not sure dress shopping with her would be the best.  It would be great if she loved the dress I like but if she didn’t, she’d give me that face (you all know the one I’m talking about) and the whole experience would take me back to prom dress shopping.  After reading through all these posts, I’m starting to feel better about going at it alone.  With the dress I really liked, I got vaildation from a random stranger – the mother of one of the brides there.  She had a face like a sledgehammer, but she told me that I looked gorgeous and I believed her!  Maybe I can go back and convince the saleslady to let me take pics so I can look at them at a later time and make up my mind.

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