Post # 1
I love my Mom very much. We get along for the most part, but she likes to throw out these barbs. It’s gotten better with time. Now instead of calling me Fat, she asks if I’ve lost weight (no I havent and I know you don’t think I have either). She makes comments about my house (it’s an older house that needs some TLC) like IF this was *my* house I would… Or my favorite about how dirty the house is. Apparently, according to her I shouldn’t be TTC because I can’t keep my house clean and I will kill any child I have because of all the dust.
I know I should be grateful. When she visits (usually 10-14 days), she spends lots of time with her friends. But on the days she doesn’t see them She can’t sit still, so she cleans the house and cooks dinner. I should be over the moon. But vacuuming every day scares the hell out of the cats and she sucks up all their favorite cat toys (that I have to cut out of the bag). And sometimes Darling Husband doesnt want to eat his dinner until 9pm, but she gets sensetive that he doesnt like her cooking, so we have to eat earlier. Heaven forbid Darling Husband goes into the kitchen to get a snack or a drink if she is in there. She asks him a thousand questions, Are you hungry? do you want me to make you this? How about that? I can cut this up for you. How about I make you… ARGH, he just wants a peice of cheese!
If I’m in the living room watching TV and Darling Husband is in his office playing computer games, she worries that we are having marital problems–every time she visits. You think she would learn. (And it’s not like she has a marriage where she and my Dad do anything together. They eat separate meals (she cooks his and while he eats she cooks her own, then eats), watch separate TV shows and even have separate bedrooms.)
And now that I’m unemployed we’ll see more of each other. And she will be asking a thousand questions about my job search which I’m not doing because I’m focusing on TTC.
Please tell me I’m not the only one who has a great Mom that drives them insane!
Post # 3
@KoiKove: Haha! You’re not alone. Whenever it’s just my mom and I, I immediately devolve into sullen teenager-hood. It’s like the last 12 years or so just never happened and I’m still 15 years old and hating my parents — at least, that’s what you’d think from the way I act around her. It’s better now that Darling Husband and I moved back to the Seattle area, as my parents only live 45 minutes away so there’s no particular reason for us to stay with each other. But a couple weekends ago, Darling Husband was out of town and Mom wanted to go baby-stuff-shopping with me so she came down to stay in our house with me.
By day 2, I was SCREAMING at her because I had to explain three times how to turn off the Playstation when she was done watching a movie. I was so embarrassed with myself later — why was I screaming at my mother?! How can I expect a woman in her 50’s to be able to figure out a PS3 controller?? But there I was, screaming away. I kicked her out of the kitchen when she was trying to help me clean because she was just “getting in my way!” Haha I need to learn some restraint, because she’ll be coming to stay with me for a while after baby is born and I will really want her help, no matter how much I want to scream at her! I think it’s just natural between mothers and daughters to drive each other a little crazy, no matter how much they love one another.
Post # 4
@KoiKove: Awww. I think most of us have that kind of relationship! My mom passed away a few years ago, but she used to drive me INSANE!
When I had my first apartment, my roommates and I mostly didn’t share food. We had a pantry with four shelves. We each had our own shelf and then there was one that was sort of a free-for-all. Well, mom came to visit and went to poke around. After several minutes I went to look for her and of course she was rearranging the pantry! I told her to stop because we each had our own shelves. If she HAD TO, she could rearrange MY shelf. She freaking did the same thing the next day! “But it makes more sense to have all your pasta together!” UM. Not when it’s not all my pasta!!! She never even pretended to forget that I had told her not to, she just kept doing it. By the time she left everything was all mixed up and I had to sit down with my roommates and figure out what the hell belonged to who!
My sister’s Mother-In-Law is the WORST though. She loves my nephew SOOO much and is so generous with them, but she’s batshit insane. She always drops by when I’m babysitting to “check” on me and bring me food to “thank” me for watching “her” baby. Um. He’s MY nephew! You don’t have to thank me for watching him! And I’m 34 and helped raise my little sister, so I don’t need you checking on me! While she’s there she’ll always comment on the state of the house (even when it’s clean!). The other day she brought the baby back and decided my sister’s house was “too hot” and refused to let them have the baby! She drove him back to her house! WHAT?! Like they couldn’t sit outside until they aired out the house or the a/c cooled it off? You really had to steal the baby? Freaking woman.
Post # 5
@iarebridezilla: I do to!!! I totally end up stomping around and saying MOOOOMMMMMM like a 15 yo and I’m 42!! My Mom can’t figure out how to work the cable TV. It’s set up through a Tivo, but she uses it like a regular TV. But sometimes the channel doesnt come through. So you have to change the channel up or down a few until it works again. At least 3-4 times per visit it happens. Each time I have to walk to the farthest part of the basement to fix it. She swears she just did the same thing. Sigh…
@MexiPino: When Darling Husband and I moved in together she wanted to rearrange our bathroom. Not the guest bathroom that she would be using. No, our MasterBath. Umm…no! She got all pouty and said, “But Friend’s Daughter let’s her rearrange anything she wants!!”
I think this is just payback for all the sleepless nights, explosive diapers and temper tantrums we put them through!
Post # 6
@KoiKove: LOL “But friend’s daughter lets her…” You know that sounds like what you probably said to her about your friends’ moms! What is with moms wanting to rearrange things? Go rearrange your own house!!!
Post # 7
@KoiKove: Haha at least my mom doesn’t try to rearrange things! I think I actually keep house better than she does (my dad is the neat freak in their marriage, and I got it from him!), so I’m safe there. She mostly just drives me crazy because her brain is getting a little slower — age plus 30 years of regular drinking will do that to a person, haha. So I get frustrated when I have to explain things several times. Just like she gets frustrated with her own mother for the exact same thing … but fails to see the connection and just thinks I’m being mean