(Closed) Anyone else moving across the country to be with SO?

posted 5 years ago in Long Distance Relationships
Post # 2
Member
4239 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

Born and raised Minnesotan here!  I would never move across the country for a SO but I do have some advice to make living in Minnesota great!  πŸ™‚

Be prepared for SEASONS.  πŸ™‚  You will experience wind chills of -40 degrees, even in the city (if you’re moving to MSP??).  Be prepared to add boots for fashion and boots for digging your car out of 18 inches of snow (Sorrells rock!) to your wardrobe, but also a heavy parka, LOTS of layers (cardigans and sweaters are my BFFs in the winter), and Smart Wool socks.  Winter unfortunately sucks and lasts 6 months typically.  Spring, summer, and fall make it totally worth it, but it always stinks that you basically have to live in boots and wool socks and 32 layers for 6 months.  In the spring, summer, and fall, northern Minnesota is GORGEOUS so be sure to take trips up there when the weather is nice!

Assuming you’re moving to MSP, there unfortunately aren’t too many public transit options.  There are some bus lines and a light rail line that goes to the major spots in both Minneapolis and St. Paul, but other than that there aren’t too many other options.  Most people drive, leading to a good deal of congestion on the roads unfortunately.  There are TONS of things to do in the Twin Cities area, from museums to music in the parks to breweries to walking around lakes…LOTS of options.  The area is also very bike friendly which is cool!

If ever you have questions about Minnesota feel free to message me.  I love it here!  πŸ™‚

Post # 3
Member
3882 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2017 - City, State

I would only consider moving to be with my SO if he lived in a place I would want to live in regardless of him being there (he currently doesn’t) and if I would be moving into my own place, not in with him. And that would be after a serious discussion and agreement about where our relationship was going.

Start job hunting up there now. Lots of places will do phone/Skype interviews if you’re out of state. Just make sure it’s a move you really want to do and that you have a plan if things don’t work out. (Not meaning breaking up or anything, but if the job situation doesn’t pan out or you end up not liking where you live)

Post # 4
Member
1311 posts
Bumble bee

Have you visited him before and know that you’ll like the area? I moved across the country to live with my now fiancé, and unfortunately I hate the area we live in. It’s been a huge cause of stress for me, for a few reasons. Where we live is rural, closest city to find work is 45+ miles either west or east of us. It sucks. You should take a lot into consideration before moving besides “you’re sick of Arizona.” Lol πŸ™‚ Also I think you should only move if your relationship is serious and you know 100% you’ll be taking the next step toward marriage. It’s also very hard being away from friends and family; very lonely. 

Post # 5
Member
17 posts
Newbee

I did a bit of the reverse recently; I moved across the country from Alabama to Arizona to be with my fiancé.

I also had a firm understanding with him a year in advance (when we were still dating). I told him that if he thought our relationship would develop into a marriage, I would apply to a pharmacy school in Arizona and move out to be with him. I also told him that I am a good Southern girl, and I would never move across the country for a man without a ring on my finger and a promise to be married. 

I’m not saying that you have to be engaged but, if you are moving with the intent that he will propose sooner as opposed to seven years from now, you may want to let your intentions to be known. It is better to be bold and understood than to be quiet and risk a heavy disappointment down the road. We were also apart for six months until I was finished with my degree in AL. I recommend having a job lined up before you move, so that you have something to walk in to.

Being away from family is hard, but there are always holidays and phone calls. I’ve been out here for over two months now, and I am glad to have taken the plunge.

Post # 6
Member
4226 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2015 - Hotel Ballroom

View original reply
lopeztosmith:  I didn’t move across the country, but I moved to a new city and had to find a new job. I hated it at first! I felt very out of place, and like I had lost a part of my identity. I had left behind my job, home, and friends. After a few months I came around. I found a new job, met some new people and got used to the ‘culture’ of my new city.

You will be FINE! Best of luck πŸ™‚

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