Post # 16
I don’t think I’m so much worried about “stuff” (I’m pretty minimalist and very much into wants vs needs), more so the bigger ticket ongoing expenses – for example child care: I called a place last week – day care is only $200 less than my mortgage payment!! The cost of day care still makes financial sense compared to our income, and fortunately we can afford it but it’s a hard pill to swallow considering that money is currently discretionary $$ for savings, etc.
Post # 17
I sort of worry, but at the same time don’t. On paper, for us, it is always nerve wracking, but someone in reality everything evens out and I usually have more money than I thought!
Post # 18
Nope, the majority of our friends make less than us and have children already and are doing justfine. My mom and dad often remind us that they didn’t have much when we were little.
My best friend has a 3 year old. They did not plan her and had no money between them. She was still in school, living with her parents and he had a pretty average job. They often comment on just how inexpensive having a baby is. I think a lot of people way over-spend or just love to complain.
Lots of families get by on very little.
You need the basics and lots of love. The rest is a plus. IMO, don’t let money come between you and your family. You can’t take it with you when you die 🙂
You need to ascertain what standard of living you can handle and make your decisions from there 🙂
Post # 19
- Wedding: March 2016 - Surfer\'s Beach, Grand Cayman
You’re not alone. I thought we were in a position financially to afford a child but honestly before I was pregnant I think I just had no clue how much stuff you actually need to buy, I’m sort of freaking out. I guess that’s what baby showers are for!
Post # 20
I don’t understand people who say babies are inexpensive. Yes, you don’t need all the stuff for them, but you should be paying for health insurance for them, putting money in a college fund for them, either moving to live in a good school district or saving for private school, saving for your own retirement so that they aren’t obligated to support you in your old age…it’s not the physical stuff, it’s the planning and saving.
Post # 21
Childcare is the main expense for us. Otherwise I don’t think there are that many crazy costs, at least when they’re babies/toddlers.
Post # 22
I didn’t find children to be expensive until they were old enough for private schools and competition sports 😛 I think it’s smart to be financially prepared as much as you can for any situation, though.
Post # 23
Absolutely i worry about it! Yes you can raise children cheaply, but having children is more expensive than not having children – that’s a fact. And the childcare issue is a worry as I don’t have an familial support. My husband pays child support also which means we probably literally couldn’t afford more kids for at least a few more years.
Having said that, I don’t think there’s ever a right time. I think people just have kids and make it work. So I think its possible to support children within all different income brackets and to do it well.
Post # 24
beebee1983: It’s pretty different here in New Zealand.
Healthcare and dental is practically free to anyone under 18 and we have a national health service that’s highly subsidised so private health insurance isn’t really a thing. Our government also gives out interest-free student loans so that everyone can afford college, you pay it back through a % of your pay check like tax each month. Childcare here is greatly subsidised here, 20 hours free a week if you’re working. Our school system is mostly public, good and free minus some minor costs.
The focus here is about ensuring all children have the same opportunites regardless of their parent’s social or financial standing. I love that!
We also have something here called KiwiSaver that is a retirement/savings plan that you and your employer automatically contribute to as a % of your pay each month. Fiance and I have only been in the workforce for 3 years (we’re 25) and already have over $40, 000 in our fund. You’re allowed to withdraw from this toward your first home deposit and the governent also has a first home grant in place where the give you an extra $10 000 toward it if you need it. Because of this we’re going to be able to get on the property ladder, which is near impossible here in Auckland.
Pretty awesome country to live in 🙂 Finances are hardly ever a worry.
So I do apologise if my comment is out of context for you!
Post # 25
Cory_loves_this_girl: I don’t think that many people exaggerate child expenses. Major expenses like child care and health care are hard to avoid and tend to be the most costly. So I know a child for us would cost at least $22,000 in the first year from child care, monthly health care premiums and out of pocket max alone, not including any nursery items, formula or diapers. Also, healthcare can be quite pricey. It will cost us $250 extra month to add a child.
Also, for SAHMs, it it likely they are giving up income if they did work previously, so that should be taken into account. Yes, sometimes it makes sense to stay home rather than work because of child care costs, but that is still lost inocme and a real cost.
Children don’t have to cost a ton, but they will be expensive, no matter how you spin it (unless you magically get free daycare and can still work).
OP, the fact that you are planning is a great thing. We are planning to pay off all debt and then save up about $10,000 just for year 1 to cover OOP max, nursery and a few months of child care. I am the breadwinner (I make six figures and twice as much as DH), so staying home is not a sensible option. Darling Husband may go to part-time, but we will see. So we will likely have child care expenses, which average about $1,100-$1,400 a month in our area.
Post # 26
OMG! We are going to ttc in about a year and I’m frequently jn the how do people afford this mode…. We are very financially stable but it’s still soo scary.
Post # 27
tillymac: I’m in New Zealand too and whilst all of those things you mentioned are wonderful, the cost of living here (esp. food and housing) is insane, particularly compared to the crap wages. Also, the 20 free childcare hours are only for 3-4 year olds, so doesn’t help much for parents who have to go back to work when their kids are younger (which I’d wager is necessary for most families). It’s great you’re doing well, but not everyone in NZ is in the same boat financially and can afford to have kids without a care in the world where “finances are hardly ever a worry”. Frankly that’s a ridiculous generalisation. I’d love to have kids now, but despite owning our own house and both working full time, we can’t afford it…
Post # 28
beebee1983: this! You totally articulated what I’m talking about.
tillymac: wow! New Zealand sounds awesome!
Post # 29
aphroditejones: Yep. My husband and I make a very comfortable living but it still keeps me up at night, TBH. Your whole mentality changes – no more spur of the moment trips, or big purchases without looking at how it affects your long term financial plans for your kids, etc. I get that some people don’t think you need to do any of that (start college funds, save for retirement, etc) but I couldn’t imagine having a kid unless we were in a position to give her a stable life, opportunity for a good education, and still be able to save money for emergencies (and so our kids don’t have to take us in when we’re older).
Post # 30
Here in DC the average daycare cost alone runs about $2K per month. That doesn’t include diapers or formula or medical bills… So it’s mind boggling to me when people say babies aren’t expensive. We are homeowners, both make good money and have good benefits, started saving up before we even got married, and I’m still nervous about money.