Post # 1
My fiance and I are not big fans of the first look so we’ve always said since the beginning that we won’t do one. We really wanted the first time we see each other to be when I’m coming down the aisle, so that it’s really special and emotional. Also, we feel like it’s kinda awkward when the bride taps the groom on the shoulder and he turns around knowing that his reaction is being photographed and filmed…like it wouldn’t be his natual reaction because we aren’t alone.
Is anyone else not doing a first look?
Anyone think we will regret not doing a first look? If so, why?
Post # 3
@sofiekitty: I am not…I have no desire to whatsoever. I want that raw emotion when he firsts sees me walking down the aisle 🙂
Post # 4
Not a fan and not doing one 🙂
Post # 6
I am doing it, i think there will still be emotion when I walk down the aisle. You are walking down the aisle to be his wife and commit to him forever, that is pretty emotional.
Also, the tradition of not seeing the bride until she walks down the aisle is from back in the days when women were cattle, so the groom didnt get to see the bride beforehand and run away. Not so romantic in my opinion lol
Post # 7
I really wanted to because I thought the pictures would be great, and I wanted to make some of our cocktail hour, but Fiance refuses. He is adamant about seeing me for the first time when I walk down the aisle.
Post # 8
I don’t really have a preference, but Fiance is ADAMANT that he doesn’t see me until I walk down the aisle. So we’re doing that 🙂
Post # 9
@sofiekitty: We are doing a first look. We both felt the same way as you, initially, and were against the idea of a first look. After talking to several photographers, and reviewing our timeline for the day, it became apparent that it would benefit us timing-wise to do a first look and get some pictures done before the ceremony. We began to take to the idea, and after a while, we both realized that it will be an amazing experience.
We are very private people. I think the first look will be perfect for us. I am excited to see his reaction to my dress, to seeing me for the first time. If we were at the altar/walking down the aisle, we wouldn’t have much of an opportunity to tell each other what we’re thinking. Doing a first look give us that opportunity. To laugh, to cry, to smile, to kiss, to do whatever feels right in that moment.
It won’t be cheesy, and I certainly won’t be tapping Fiance on the shoulder! We’re working on a way to make it special. (There is a stone wall where either Fiance or I will be waiting on the other side when the other rounds the corner. It is a private space, so it will be intimate and private. Our photographers will be far away, not in our faces.) We can take some time to just appreciate the moment, and then we’ll take some pictures together and with family and bridal party.
I can’t say if the first look is right for you. But I do know that it is exactly right for me and Fiance.
Post # 10
That’s so interesting because my fiance is the SAME!! He is absolutely against the first look.
Thanks for the advice. I think you have a really good point about how you can make it special and not cheesy in your own way. I also think it give a good chance to spin around and show off my entire dress, rather than just the fron view as I walk down…
Haha I didn’t know that that’s where the tradition came from…I think my fiance mainly doesn’t want to do the first look so that the emotion is more intense during the ceremony.
Post # 11
We did a first look (but I didn’t vote – I have no idea if you’ll regret not doing one). We did it because it made sense given our compressed timeline (couldn’t start the ceremony before 5pm, had to be out of the reception hall by 10pm), because we wanted to enjoy the cocktail hour, and because we genuinely like the concept of first look pictures and love some of the shots of our friends from their weddings. It’s up to you if you have the pictures done privately (just the two of you) or surrounded by your family/bridal party (we had the latter – didn’t plan it that way, just how it happened…but some of my favorite shots have my sister and father in the background reacting to my husband seeing me). You also can stage it any way you want – you don’t need to do the tap on shoulder thing (we didn’t). I’m glad we did it. But if none of these things are true for you and you won’t find a way to do it that makes you comfortable, then don’t do it — you’ll regret not having the moment you want, whatever that is. (And for the record, the aisle was still a powerful moment for both of us, and there are some pictures of the groom tearing-up as I’m walking down, despite the fact that it wasn’t the first time he saw me that day.)
Post # 12
Our first look was our favorite part of the day! It was so wonderful having that private moment (honestly didn’t even think about our photographer because we were focused on each other). We were able to tell each other how much we love each other and compliment each other aim how we looked. DH was so starstruck, it was adorable! We also got a lot of our pictures taken before the ceremony, which was convenient. Having a first look made walking down the aisle so emotional and wonderful because I knew how happy we both were and we had already had time to connect and let the realization that we were getting married sink in. Nothing would have been a bigge regret for us if we hadn’t done a first look.
Post # 13
We didn’t do one and I don’t regret it. Not doing a first look was one of the few things my husband had a strong opinion about when it came to wedding planning. Our photographer and videographer perfectly captured his face when he saw me walking down the aisle.
We had great pictures after the ceremony that still captured the excitement of that day.
Post # 14
We don’t plan to do one and it’s a pretty big deal for us. We’re not very traditional about a lot of things, but we’re not going to sleep in the same room the night before or see each other the entire day of. The only thing we might do close to a first look is meet on opposite sides of a door or the corner of a building so we can’t see each other but still get a photo.
Post # 15
@sofiekitty: I agree with the others, wait till he sees you walkin down the isle and get a pic then (:
Post # 16
No first look but not going to wait until I walk down the aisle too. We are getting most of our pictures done first. First looks and not seeing each other are simply not us at all.