(Closed) anyone else not having a shower or bachelorette party?

posted 4 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 2
10452 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

I skipped having a shower and bachelorette as well. All my friends and family are spread out all over the country and logistically it just didn’t make sense to do them.

Honestly, while I was bummed about it at the time, now that my wedding has come and gone I don’t really mind. 

Post # 3
60 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 24 2017

I am in a similar situation. We hare having a decent sized wedding but everyone is out of town. All my bridesmaids, my mom, etc. I didn’t think I was getting a shower but then my Future Mother-In-Law decided to throw me one. It wont be big only about 20, if that, and a lot of people can’t make it. But it’ll still be nice. As for a Bachelorette party I couldn’t care less. I could choose to organize it, but I genuinely don’t care and will most likely be skipping it. I’ve also read that a Bridal Shower is less common than we think nowadays. You can always do a luncheon with some girlfriends in lieu of a party. 🙂 

Post # 4
433 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

I didn’t have either and neither did my BFF we got married 5 months apart.

Post # 5
13 posts
  • Wedding: April 2017

Our wedding date is 04/22/17; total 45 people (including us 2 & 3 vendors). I had a “bachelorette party” last September, but really it was just a girl’s weekend so we could go ziplining when the weather was still nice ha. There were only 5 of us (me from MO, my Maid/Matron of Honor & her sister from IL, a friend from KS, & another friend from KY). I am not having a bridal shower for many reasons, mostly because I hate them (& also distance), lol!

Post # 6
1156 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

I had a bachelorette, but no shower. We didn’t register and told people not to buy gifts because it was a destination wedding. While driving was only a few hours for most, still required them to pay for a rental house for the weekend. 

Post # 7
369 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2016

I didn’t have either and I don’t mind.  I honestly didn’t even want a bachelorette party lol.

Post # 8
769 posts
Busy bee

I don’t want either. We are eloping 

Post # 9
3 posts
  • Wedding: May 2017

I am not having a shower or bachelorette party. My maids, family and friends are spread out and we are having a semi – destination wedding. I would have felt incredibly selfish to ask them all to travel again. What we did instead was mailed custom recipe and advice cards out to all the ladies and asked them to fill them out and send them back to me to help fill my recipe book. The custom cards read:

“As a way to celebrate the soon to be Mrs. XXXXX, we request your help in filling up XXXXX’s recipe book by collecting favorites from her family and friends. We also would like to deliver your finest advice and well-wishes to pass along to the bride-to-be. Please join us in showering XXXXX by mailing back these cards with your favorite recipe, advice and wishes.

“Advice and wishes for the soon to be Mrs.”




Post # 10
1359 posts
Bumble bee

I had no shower and for my “bachelorette” the four family friends invited to my wedding came over to my place and we had a cookout and a night around the fire pit. I really didn’t miss these events, and they wouldn’t have made sense as we had 25 people including ourselves at our wedding.

Post # 11
2027 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

I had neither. Our wedding was a similar size but domestic destination, no bridal party, and friends spread out all over the country. I don’t regret it; I didn’t want a big fuss over anything and wanted the wedding celebration to be more about me and my husband vs. me & my friends. We enjoyed celebrating with everyone at the wedding.

Post # 12
115 posts
Blushing bee

We are doing a “planned elopement”/intimate wedding with 6 guests. I’m not having a shower, but my sis is throwing a small bachelorette (basically inviting those girls who would be bridesmaids if I were doing a larger wedding). I have a couple of friends who were in the same boat as you and did a “bachelorette”/pre-wedding event for the girls in town for the wedding two nights or the night before the wedding (one did a pub crawl and the other did a bowling night). 

Post # 13
88 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2017 - Woodlawn Cemetery

I am having neither, its going to be an immediate family only wedding – around 18 people including us. We skipped engagement pics and save the dates too, we skipped a lot actually 

Post # 14
2684 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

View original reply
morgandrewtaylor :  Me too! I’m having a very intimate wedding with only 15 people in attendance (outside of myself, Fiance, and officiant), so we have decided to do away with a lot of “extras” including the bachelorette and bridal shower. There’s really no need in our case. xoxo

Post # 15
1240 posts
Bumble bee

I’m in the same boat as 

View original reply
spifftiff88 in many ways. My husband and I got married where we live and are having a dinner/party for about 20 people in the US this summer. He had a small bachelor party here before we married, but we didn’t do an engagement party, engagement photos, save the dates, showers, or bachelorette. Part of me is bummed but the more practical part of me knows it isn’t logistically feasible. I hate being the center of attention anyway. 

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