(Closed) Anyone else worried about the first dance?

posted 9 years ago in Music
Post # 3
Member
2022 posts
Buzzing bee

Considering we haven’t picked a song yet…yes, a little nervous : )

Post # 4
Member
6661 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

Don’t be nervous! It goes by so fast and no one expects you to be good. Most of the time the couple has the band or DJ request the bridal party to join after about 30 seconds anyway, so think about doing that!

Post # 5
Member
2365 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

If you took one dance lesson that would be all you need to know how to dance without stepping on each others feet!

You could even watch on youtube or something!

Post # 6
Member
428 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2009 - Church Ceremony/Reception at The Waterford House

Um yes.  We have not taken lessons, nor do we plan on it.  We don’t have a song either. Yikes!

Post # 7
Member
3162 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I am SO nervous about the first dance! Not only am I not much of a dancer (I’m not AWFUL, but when it comes to slow dancing I don’t know what to do with myself), but Fiance and I cannot seem to even agree on a first dance song! Also, my dad HATES dancing, and while I figured out a good song for us (Beatles’ All My Life – props to the hive on that one!), I still feel like he is just going to be secretly (or maybe not so secretly…) hating it the whole time. And I totally hear you on not liking to be the center of attention with everyone’s eyes on you. I’m going to absolutely hate every second of the first dance and father/daughter dance but my mom and Fiance insist on it. Oy.

Post # 8
Member
2342 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

My Fi and I aren’t bad dancers, but we decided to take dance lessons to wow our guests.  We picked a Frank Sinatra song that I know will be great…I can’t wait!  But it does make me a little nervous to have the spot light and that might make me mess up even more! 

Post # 9
Member
1514 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

Pick a slow song and just sway to the music.  Seriously, your day flies by SO fast it’s such a blur anyway.  I hardly even remember our first dance (let alone most of the other parts) except for the pictures.  You’ll be fine, enjoy your day.

Post # 10
Member
361 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

It’s your day.  Don’t worry about what others think of your dancing.  If I think back on all of the first dances I’ve seen – in person and on tv – they weren’t exactly spectacular.  It’s just extra if it is.  Most people just relax and sway to the music, like IA Snowflake mentioned. 

We tried the Youtube dance lesson thing, and it just made it more stressful for us.  So, we’re just gonna wing it.  Hahahaha.

Post # 11
Member
2015 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

I’m nervous about it, too, but people keep telling me that half the room doesn’t even pay much attention anyway, and the other half expects you to just do the “hug ‘n sway” thing. I started you tubing first dancesd at weddings, and some, with the exception of the choreographed ones where people took lessons, they weren’t all that bad.

I didn’t even want to do the first dance, but my Fiance REALLY wanted to for some reason, so I told him, “Fine, but I pick the song, and it can be really short.” I ended up picking “That’s How Strong My Love Is” by Otis Redding, and it’s about 3 mins long.

Post # 12
Member
2022 posts
Buzzing bee

beagle, i’m with you!  we listened to some songs last week and nothing has struck us as “our song.”  most of the songs that are meaningful to us are not appropriate first dance songs…

Post # 13
Member
15 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: December 2009

I was nervous about this too, and a few of my married friends offered me this piece of advice: choose a short song.  

People tend to pick these long, long songs and after about 45 seconds, the level of awkwardness triples.  After about two minutes, the level of awkwardness quintuples.  Five minutes later, you and your hubby are wishing the ground would open up and swallow you and all your guests are wondering how much longer the torture will last.

So either choose a very brief song (my guy and I are dancing to Coldplay’s “Parachutes,” it’s less than a minute) or just have the DJ only play a minute or so of the song you want.

One to two minutes is plenty of time to get out there, enjoy being alone on the floor together and get some great pictures.

Post # 14
Member
7174 posts
Busy Beekeeper

Try to think positively about it – worrying will just make it worse.  Think of it as some moments you get with your new hubby that NO ONE will interrupt.  And, I love the advice of picking a song on the short side… I think you’ll be surprised by how quickly the time will pass… and it may help to practice with your Fiance a few times w/ the song.

Post # 15
Member
2856 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

Coming from a brand new newlywed who definitely doesn’t like the spotlight, you will be OK. My Fiance and I are great dancers but for our first dance, I swear we didn’t move lol. It was just a very slow sway side to side. Why not try to practice before the big day. Close your curtains and shades and the two of you go at it…Not GO AT IT 🙂 but just practice. I promise you will be fine, especially if it is just a normal slow dance.

Post # 16
Member
18 posts
Newbee

I agree. I was considering taking dance lessons too. I’m a good dancer. My fiance is ok – basic high school moves :). I was originally all gung ho to choreograph our dance, but I get a little nervous being in the spotlight as well. And after talking to most of my married friends who keep telling me how fast the day will fly by, I’ve decided to forgo the lessons since I would rather be able to hold him close and talk and be nervous and reflect on the day for the 2-3 minutes we’re dancing than be concentrating on steps and not being able to focus on him.

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