Post # 1
Oh my. There is so much pressure to look “perfect” on one’s wedding day. I think it’s stressing me out. My wedding is in 10 days.
My dress is a sheath lace dress, very form fitting. I’ve been working out like crazy. Cardio 3-4 times per week and sits-up and leg lefts every single morning as well as diet changes. I’m now 120 lbs and 5’4″.
But when I put on my dress, I think my hips still look too big. I’m wearing spanx to smooth things out, but I still think my hips and butt look large in comparison to the rest of my body. I think that maybe I’m not really “seeing” myself as I actually look. Everyone says I look great, but I honestly don’t see it that way. I don’t want to feel all self conscious on my wedding day.
When we got our pictures taken for our engagement session, I wasn’t as in shape. So I was unhappy with some of the pictures. Now, I’m worried I’ll feel same way about my wedding photos…
Any ideas to help me combat these negative body image feelings?
Post # 3
Here’s a paddle – let’s get this boat moving because we’re both in it! I feel exactly the same way, I’ve lost close to 20lbs and I think I look worse now than I did when I started dieting/exercising. I’ve also been doing tons of work outs that help build muscle a bit and my arms are less flabby but now I feel they look bulky.
So, having established that clearly the relationship with the mirror / camera isn’t a good one, how to move on? I’ve had a think about it and figured that if there would be one regret I would have about the wedding day it’s not enjoying myself because I’m too self-concious. What if you look back at the pictures and all you see is a forced smile and a bride clearly trying to hide? That would be far worse! Try to see your progress and also focus on the good parts of your body. We all have hang-ups (Lord knows I spend enough time every morning scrutinizing my tummy side-profile every morning…) but surely there are things about yourself that you do like? Or you can ask your FI, I’m sure he’ll give you a whole list of things he loves about your body in a split-second!
Post # 4
- Wedding: August 2013 - The Liberty House
I’m not worried about it =) I know I look good! It’s really just about not being as critical of yourself, and focusing on the good instead of the bad. Also, hips are supposed to be big!!
Post # 5
There is so much pressure on us as brides to look perfect. And I feel the same way. It’s hard to be super comfident when all ayes are on you! But I have personally never seen an ugly bride. On the day of the wedding, you’ll have that bridal glow. Nobody will notice any slight imperfections…and hopefully you’ll be able to forget about them, too. Because you will be beautiful 🙂
Post # 6
@ColoroftheSky: I don’t have a lot of advice, but I feel ya. I should be excited about my wedding day, but all I am dwelling on is that I’m going to look like a bloated sow.
Post # 7
I feel the same. I’ve been looking at pictures of other real brides in wedding photos and on pre owned wedding dresses. Even the runway models have wider hips than upper bodies. In looking at the images of the other women, I’ve found myself thinking “wow, she looks great! She’s really rocking that form-fitting dress!” And then noticing that she has similar shape to me!
Post # 10
God yes. I just had my first fitting and I was expecting to feel beautiful and bridal and instead I was like…bleh. I’ve been working on toning my arms for months and they still didn’t look good, although a tan might help matters. I am also doubting my decision to go with an A-line dress because I feel like it really accentuates the fact that my hips, butt and thighs are HUGE compared to my waist. I have lost weight since purchasing the dress, but I’ve got no idea where it’s come from because my butt and thighs are still big. With my luck it’s probably all come from my boobs.
Post # 11
I agree! I searched for a few months to find my discontinued dress. I found it but one size to small! So needless to say I promised my alterations lady I would giver her 20lbs if she can give me an inch or two! I am sure you will look lovely and you will have many photos you do love!
Post # 12
@ColoroftheSky: When I read your height/weight stats, I don’t think there is any way your hips can look too big (but I also don’t know how you carry your weight). If you truly believe your hips need more slimming, you can try shapewear or a slip.
Of course, you can also practice posing/modeling to ensure you make the best of your assets. It feels silly/embarrassing at first, but I guarantee the more comfortable you are posing in front of a mirror at home, the comfortable you will be taking photos on your wedding day.
Ultimately, though, the true change needs to happen inside (LOL I sound like a motivational speaker). Um…synergy! But seriously, I have said it before, and I will say it again: the #1 accessory you need to feel “incredible” is confidence, love. That is the true secret to being a true, head-turning beauty. Once you feel as if nothing can bring you down, nothing will! Just remember: you will be a beautiful bride no matter what, and your DH will love whatever you wear because he loves you.
Being confident doesn’t mean you won’t feel fat/ugly/less-than sometimes. The key difference, though, is that even on your worst days, your temporary feelings about your outward appearance does nothing to shake your self-esteem because physical appearance (while important), should never be the root of your self-confidence. I feel like such a twat doing this, but I am going to point you to a long-arse comment I left in another thread about self-confidence. I hope you find it helpful: http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/low-self-esteem-1#axzz2VPpvPf10.
Post # 13
I totally feel the same way! I know tha tI should be happy with who I am and that my FI loves me the way I am. But I feel so much pressure to look my best on that day and I am super worried that I’m not going to feel pretty and that I am going to be dissapointed in the way I look in my pictures.
Post # 14
I understand exactly how you feel! I purchased a dress that is very form fitting. It was a discontinued sample so when I bought it it didn’t fit and I’ve lost 30 pounds since then and had to have the dress taken in. But in that weight lose I lost a full cup size so now I feel like Im all butt and hips and no boobs and look unbalanced in the dress…..frustrating!!!
Post # 15
@ColoroftheSky:This is so weird. I have the same wedding date, and I literally could have written this myself (except I’m a little taller and weight a little more)
I’m FREAKING OUT. I totally hear you. Everyone is telling me I’m crazy, so I don’t know how to fix it!
Post # 16
@ColoroftheSky: i felt sooooooooooo fat on my weddimg dress. I suggest stop thinking about it.
i hated my hair color I hated my hair style and I felt sooooooooo fat.
just breath and relax and enjoy