- 4 years ago
I’m always curious how other bees dealt with this issue, or if they even had a problem with it. I have nothing against women who do – it’s a personal choice, but I am always curious about other women’s reasons for not changing theirs and how their fiance feels about it.
As for me, I never saw myself changing my last name, and I honestly never even thought it would be an issue. So when the topic came up with my boyfriend, I was genuinely SHOCKED at how upset he was. We’ve had several talks about it since then and it is still a sensitive topic for both of us.
-a family should have the same last name
-he feels it is disrespectful to him and his family for me to “reject” their last name
-my last name is part of who I am, why would that change just because I am getting married?
-we are not traditional in other ways (living together, sexually active, etc.) so why this ONE tradition?
-speaking of tradition, this one started because women were considered their husband’s property -no thank you!
-it’s EXTREMELY UNFAIR to expect me to give up my last name, when he would not consider giving up his —>this one is the biggest one for me
-plus, my last name is more unique, and his last name is extrememly common, so I’d be losing that bit of identitiy as well
I suggested to him that if he was that concerned about having the same last name, he is welcome to take mine, lol.
Anyone else go through this? What did you end up doing?