Post # 1
My wedding isn’t for another year, but I have officially asked one of my very best friends (who is a guy) to be in my bridal party, and he said yes 🙂 I know that this is pretty untraditional, but he is one of my best friends in the world, and my wedding day would not feel complete without him by my side. My fiance is totally fine with this (this shouldn’t/doesn’t matter, but just for some clarification purposes, my guy friend is gay, so there’s no jealousy or weirdness of any kind there haha)
My question is just for how to handle the logistics of having a guy be on the bride’s side. I know just putting him in with the groomsmen is an option, but, though he and my fiance like each other/get along, they barely know each other. It would be super weird for him to be with my fiance and his friends!
We’re already definitely planning on having my friend stand on my side of the altar during the ceremony. But my question is more about other things, like…
The bachelorette party. Should he attend too? Two out of the other four in my bridal party are two of his best friends as well (in fact, all three of us are going to be in HIS wedding party as well haha). Again, it’s another thing where it feels wrong not to include him, but I just don’t know if it’s… weird?
And then there’s the actual day of the wedding. Like, he doesn’t need hair and make up done. But should he be there when the rest of us get ready? Should he get ready with the guys then join us after for pictures?
Sorry for all the weird questions haha I’ve never been in or to a wedding where a guy was on the bride’s side (or vice-versa!) so I have no idea how these sort of things work!
Again, I know I’m asking crazy-early since my wedding is a year away. But I kinda wanna start thinkingabout these sorts of details early 🙂
Post # 2
I’m not married yet but I’m considering mixed bridal/groom parties. Curious to see others’ answers as well!
Post # 3
I wanted my best friend (guy) to be a bridesman and he was hesitant at first (he’s a little more traditional) but would have been willing to do it if that’s what I truly wanted. He ended up becoming a groomsman anyway due to tragic circumstances.
Post # 4
I was a bridesmaid in a mixed gender wedding party, and it worked out pretty well. The bride had her brother on “her side” and the groom had his sister and a close female friend on his. They ended up having the men and women get ready separately, women with the bride and men with the groom because his sister and female friend wanted their hair done. They didn’t do bachelor/ette parties, but FWIW one of my female friends recently attended her best guy friend’s bachelor party. For the pre-wedding parties, I think you can choose activities that include everyone.
Post # 5
citizenerased14 : Darling Husband has a woman on his side, and one of my best friends had a guy on her side. As for the woman on DH’s Side, she got ready with the guys the morning of, and stood with the guys. I invited her to get ready with the girls and she declined. She was invited to and attended my bachelorette party. She was also invited to the bachelor party but declined.
As for my friend who had a guy, he stood up on her side. He did not attend her bachelorette. I don’t know if he attended the bachelor party or not.
I know you said this guy isn’t friends with your Fiance, but this could be an opportunity for them to get to know each other better, since they’re both a major part of your life. I’d invite him both to your bachelorette and the bachelor party and let him decide what he’d like to do.
Post # 6
I had a Man of Honor on my side (my best friend of over 20 years) and my husband had his 15 year old niece on his side.
Post # 7
I had a bridesman. He went to my husbands bachelor party cause he was more into that and both parties took place the same night. He showed up sometime when we were getting ready and was there for getting ready pictures. As for the walk down the aisle he walked down with our other friend of 15+ years who stood up on my husbands side (we love them both so we split custody so to speak).
Post # 8
I don’t have a Bridal Party but having mixed gender on both sides is becoming very common. My sister’s husband had a sister and a female friend as groomswomen. As for things like attending the Bach parties I think that’d be more individual as to what they’d like to do. A friend got mine has a gay bff and he’s totally all about doing all the traditionally female things. But of course that doesn’t mean every gay man is. And then sometimes you have an opposite gender sibling or friend on your side who would rather die than go to your Bach party or bridal shower lol! So I’d just ask him.
Post # 9
I’m not married yet but we’re having a small destination wedding and only having a best man and on my side a man of honour since my best friend is a guy. He will be with me when I get ready 🙂
Post # 10
I’m not married yet, but my Maid/Matron of Honor will be a man of honour. We’re not having any pre-wedding activities though. I needed him as a witness and couldn’t imagine anyone else in that spot.
Post # 11
I didn’t personally have guys on my side, but would happily done so had my best friend been male or my brother’s older (they were our ring bearers). A friend of mine, however, is having her brother as Man of Honour and then a couple of girlfriends as bridesmaids. As far the bachelorette party and shower go, she is leaving it to him whether he would like to attend or not. Her Fi has also made it clear that he is welcome to go to his bachelor party as well/instead. The last I heard, the brother would be attending the shower but not the bachelorette (the bachelor party is on the same night and he felt he would have more fun at that). He is having a hand in planning both events.
Post # 12
- Wedding: June 2015 - Malibou Lake Mountain Club
citizenerased14 : i had my guy friend on my side, and my husband had his girl friend on his. each of our friends attended our respective bachelor/bachelorette parties. here’s pics:
Post # 13
We are having a mixed bridal Party (wedding in august so no pictures). We each have 2 girls and 2 guys. For the ceremony the guys are on one side and the girls are on the other, but I am having pictures with my people and he’s having pictures with his. It was a bit of a fight for us bc my FH wanted things to be ‘even’ but we worked it out and all is good now. Just do what you want. There are some options like having your guy wear a vest and tie that matches the girls.
Guys are getting ready together, girls are getting ready together (we have different needs), I’m not having a bachelorette (That I know of) so we don’t have that issue. If he’s the only guy I would ask him what he feels comfortable with/would like to do. I see no problem with him at the bachelorette if its what you want. Basically what i’m saying is you do you and don’t worry about anyone else
Post # 14
My best friend is gay, he is going to stand on my fiance’s side as he has also become very good friends with him. He came to my bridal shower and bachelorette party, and is also attending my fiance’s bachelor party. It is up to you where you want him to stand. He plans on spending time with both myself and my fiance getting ready on the morning of. I am also getting married in the Catholic church and I’m not sure how they feel about men on the bridal side (they can be kinda stiff….) so I’m not sure if that would be a factor for you, where your ceremony is taking place
Post # 15
I will be having TWO guys on my side. For one of them, I was also the “best woman” at his wedding.
Basically I won’t be treating them any different. I assume the only difference is they won’t need make-up (but both are crazy about their hair so that might take as much time as ours, haha), but I also assume they’ll want to be with us when we get ready (though they may get to sleep in). I’m thinking of having their ties match the bridesmaids’ dresses, but I’m not sure about the color details of the suits/tuxes. I think I’ll just ask their opinion on that one. Prefferably I’d like them to be cearly on “my side” but if they want to just match the groomsmen (but stand with me), then I don’t really care.