(Closed) Anyone feel like critiquing my cover letter?

posted 7 years ago in Career
Post # 3
241 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

Hi there!

I think your letter looks great. One piece of advice I was given on cover letters was to use language from the job desription in the letter. So, if the job specifically requires someone who can “easily multitask in a fast-paced environment” I would parrot that to some degree.

And the same for connecting your skills with what specifically the organization is hiring for, ie: “I think I could hit the ground running on your program X due to my experience with Y,” or something to that effect.

But overall your letter is clear and paints a great picture of your qualifications! I might either shorten the second paragraph a little or break it into two–visually it’s a little long, though it may appear differently on regular 8.5 x 11 paper.

Good luck! I’m also job hunting, so I know what it’s like out there! πŸ™‚

Post # 5
11166 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

My experience: I am not an HR person or a hiring manager but I am responsible for dealing with any hirings in our office (don’t ask me why, haven’t a clue). I am currently looking for someone to fill a customer service position and get approximately 20-30 applicants daily to review.

My (Humble) Opinion: Most coverletters out there are too long when someone is weeding through several applicants.

I typically skim through a coverletter and look for points that are relevant to the job.  As the PP mentioned make sure you are using similar language as listed in the job description. Make your qualifications jump out at the hiring manager, don’t bury them in wordy paragraphs.

Good luck!!! πŸ™‚

Post # 7
281 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

It’s nicely worded, but it doesn’t really jump off the page and make me want to pick up the phone and call you for an interview. I don’t think adding adjectives would do the trick, I think you might want to consider some restructuring.

Perhaps less prose/narrative and more bullets, with key messages from the job description and then an example on how you have tha experience.

Managers/HR have a lot of these to get through (esp. in this economy) and so getting right to the point is key.

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