Anyone have experience with long commutes?

posted 3 years ago in Career
Post # 17
2992 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2008

I did a commute to a job like this for two years because I had a pretty niche career and it was doable. Grad school usually only requires you to be on campus during evenings unless you are a TA so I wouldn’t worry about it unless you are uncomfortable with night driving. 

Post # 18
46 posts
  • Wedding: October 2018

How long is the program? You could always look into doing long distance for a while. With the drive only being 90 minutes, it would not be difficult to spend weekends together. I know long distance can be rough, but that way your Boyfriend or Best Friend does not have to move, and you do not have to give up this opportunity! 

Post # 21
7 posts
  • Wedding: November 2017

I’m starting a new job on Monday, it’s super far away from my house but its a great opportunity and about 20k increase in salary. I plan on going to the gym in the morning super early to beat the traffic. I expect it will take an hour without traffic but an hour and a half with traffic. 

I am starting to look for audiobooks for the ride back to take my mind off of the traffic.

I definitely wouldn’t write off grad school. i lived in the same house that i lived now during grad school and I commuted about 45 mins. We live in a High Cost of Living Area (thanks LA), so I rather put more stress on my car than live closer due to the massive amount of rent increase. 

Post # 22
7581 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

How many days a week would you have class? Would you also have a job? If so, where?

I had a 45 commute for awhile and was miserable, however, that was due to the stop and go traffic. If it had been 45 minutes on an empty road it would have been less stressful, however, I can’t see myself being happy commuting for three hours a day. Again though, I think the questions I listed above could sway my decision.

Post # 23
32 posts

I commuted 1.5 to 2 hours EACH WAY in traffic for 6 months. I wanted to quit and was extremely bitter, seriously. Without traffic it would have taken 40min, but it was during that rush hour time.

Commuting is the only option for me because homes are so expensive in the city and my job isn’t available or well-paid nearby. 

Post # 24
4053 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 2019 - Canada

View original reply
c3lloninja :  I think it would be worthwhile to ask your professor what the class schedule would be like. This would help you determine if it’s doable for you. I think moving to another area to make the commute shorter is a good compromise. Also, things to note: do you enjoy driving, or does it stress you out? Can you/ are you willing to spend a night or two a week near campus (stay with friends or family) if you have early classes or a schedule thats not compatible with a long commute?

Post # 25
15046 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

1.5 hrs apart is hardly “long distance” imo.  If you’re willing to commute to school 1.5 hours, why wouldn’t you be willing commute to him to see him.  I’d get an apartment and stay out there a few days a week, or at least have the option to if I didn’t want to drive, and then just go stay with him on weekends or see him a few times a week if I needed to.

Post # 26
1007 posts
Bumble bee

For two years and a good opportunity, it’s doable.  Agree with other posters on your bf sounding like a big stick in the mud, though. Why would he want to limit your potential?  

Post # 27
731 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2018

I’m totally not gonna say a damn thing about your relationship, because that’s not what you asked at all. 

I drove about 1 hour 15 minutes (with no traffic, 1.5 if I got stuck behind a tractor or something) twice a day, five days a week, for three years. I honestly didn’t mind it most days. Besides having to wake up at an ungodly hour, it did give me a while to get my head on straight before the day, drink my coffee, listen to some music and wake up. My commute home allowed me to decompress, think about whatever had happened that day, and get in the right mindset to go home and enjoy my evening. 

However, it ate my entire life up. There was no ‘after work’ because I wasn’t getting home until 7. My car experienced a lot of issues quickly because of wear and tear, and the gas costs were prohibitive when they spiked. When I got a job closer, I jumped on it. But sometimes I miss the ‘me’ time that was built into every day. Of course, this was through relatively pleasant back country roads. Not city streets with traffic and stress built in. So I think that was a huge factor, too. 

Post # 28
5400 posts
Bee Keeper

My commute is an hour and yesterday it was two hours. But most days it’s an hour to an hour and fifteen, hour and a half max. 

But I’m in SoCal and there’s no big weather issues other than the heat. One way is scenic because I take a toll road the other way is freeway but I listen to music. I think my absolute max is 1.5 but that might be because I’m used to it. 

I say go for it, especially if it’s not five days a week and there’s no safety issue with driving in ice. It’s definitely do able. It’s going to take an adjustment period though. I thought for sure there’s no way I could do this commute but here I am five years later still doing it. 

How long is school? 


Edited to add that should say each way for mine so one to one and a half each way. Faster in the morning. Plus we don’t move bc the city I work in costs so much to live in that it’s not worth it. 

Post # 29
701 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

How many days a week? If it were only 2 or 3 days, then maaaaybe it’s doable. I used to commute about 1 hr 15 mins to work each way (sometimes longer–Chicago traffic). Honestly, I’d never do it again unless I had literally no other options. It made my quality of life terrible. I would wake up at 5am, work, drive straight to the gym near my house, then head home and it’d already be 7pm…I’d have enough energy to eat a quick dinner and then crash…I rarely had time for any of my friends, or to do anything I enjoyed. To me my absolute maximum for commuting at this point is probably 40 minutes, with my preference being under 30 minutes…I just hate losing that much time in my car.

Post # 30
236 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2017 - Eldorado Canyon State Park

I did an hour-long (assuming there was no traffic, which there always was) commute for ~9 months for work. My husband didn’t want to move because he was still in grad school and working. Tbh I didn’t want to move either, because the job was awful and just a temporary solution until I found something better. But the commute was awful. -_- Also someone hit me on the interstate (their fault) on one of those drives. 🙁

BUT I had to do it temporarily so I sucked it up. Humans are capable of putting up with a lot of bullshit. I also went to grad school (no commute) and in my program, classes were held once a week, so I only had to go to campus, say, three times a week (assuming three classes and assuming none were on the same day). Given that kind of schedule, I could have tolerated a somewhat longer commute, and for a somewhat longer period of time, so I’m sure you could do it.

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