Anyone here get along their MIL? Share your relationship :)

posted 8 months ago in Relationships
Post # 46
1734 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2016

I get on really well with my MIL. The first time I met her she was picking DH up from uni and he’d told her I’d be there too. So FIL was texting DH to tell him MIL was nervous that morning and didn’t know what to wear to meet me. She wanted to make a good impression but not come across as over bearing. We both mocked DH and that was it, we got on really well.

She lives in a different country so we obviously don’t see each other a lot. But when we do see each other she’s sometimes done girly things with just me. We also email a lot, just us two and it’s not to just catch up with DH. I make sure DH talks to her about him. We also send little gifts to each other often. When she sends gifts they’re with me in mind and when we send gifts it’s always me who has picked something up. She tells her husband not to wind me up and has even made him apologise when we got into an argument.

I’d say we’ve butted heads once during 7 years and that was over BIL. Basically, they baby him and I think just think he’s a cretin. So when he got divorced they were calling his ex a bitch and slut and he was blameless and I didn’t really think so. I’m not the favourite DIL – whoever is making BIL happy has that title (but god help you if you’re not making him happy) – but honestly our relationship is really great.

My mum broke her leg before the wedding and wasn’t strong enough on her leg to lace up my wedding dress on the day. I asked MIL if she’d mind doing it. She was staying at the same hotel as me and I figured it would be easier because my bridesmaids would be getting ready themselves. When I asked she was really touched and came up to me after the wedding to thank me because she “never thought she’d have that opportunity and it was just wonderful to be included”. We then included the photo of her doing up my dress in the album (it was a nice photo) and again she was insanely touched by it.

My FIL on the hand is a different thing entirely. We have a very bumpy relationship. We both have strong opinions and they are frequently the polar opposite. FIL also likes arguing with people. DH tells me that he only argues with people who he believes to be on intellectual par with him, so I should take it as a compliment from his warped brain. But then he’s sometimes really great. At least MIL is a constant.

Post # 47
316 posts
Helper bee

I love my future MIL and am actually sad we won’t be living close to her and FIL. She is such a cool, strong, lady. I feel like I’m a lot like her and we get along because we respect eachother. I had a difficult relationship with my mom growing up and it’s still a bit complicated at times so she is a great mother-figure in my life. 

Post # 48
194 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

 My MIL is an awesome lady, and we get along great. Sometimes she can be a bit opinionated which I used to find intimidating, but now if I don’t like what she’s saying I just let it go in one ear and out the other. As long as she doesn’t ever try to:

   A. Interfere in my marriage or butt into our personal business

   B. Move in with us (a big HELL NO!!!)

we should continue to get along wonderfully. She treats me like one of her own kids, which is great considering how much time we spend around one another some weeks. 

Post # 49
7815 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

My MIL is great. She has always been so welcoming, and I really admire what she’s done with her life. We have varying interests, but we do have shared interests in saving money and travel. 

Post # 50
7272 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2015

stephaniee24 :  My situation is probably not typical. My MIL was already in her 70s when we met and she had had Parkinson’s already for several years. So she was mostly quiet but nice. Less than a year into our marriage she needed to be put into a memory care home and we took over all her finances/health stuff. So now I go visit her in the home 4-5 days a week for most of the afternoon. I bring her food we’ve cooked for lunch (she doesn’t like the bland food there and had started to lose weight) and then hang out with her until I have to go home for dinner. This has given us a LOT of time to get to know each other better. She’s often tired and quiet but other days she wants to talk about where she grew up, her family, when her kids were little… it’s pretty awesome. 

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