(Closed) Anyone not getting married in their home parish?

posted 6 years ago in Catholic
Post # 3
Member
831 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

This is the rule but the degree of enforcing it seems to vary from parish to parish.

I am getting married at my FI’s parish in the neighborhood where he grew up, which is just a few miles from where we live now.  His parents still go to church there every week. They didn’t ask us for any kind of letter from our current parish. But his family is pretty well known there as active parishoners so maybe that’s why?

any chance of joining the new parish? if the parish you want to get married in is close to where you live anyway?

I’m sure it won’t be that big of a deal, just go in to the meeting with a positive attitude –

 

Post # 5
Member
542 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

The rule is you are supposed to be married in the bride or groom’s home parish, (for some reason the bride’s parish is preferred, but it can be either bride’s or groom’s parish) or else permission (which may include a meeting with the pastor of the home parish) needs to be granted.

I got married in Brooklyn, in my husband’s parish. They were very thorough with the paperwork and process.

Post # 6
Member
3697 posts
Sugar bee

The paperwork you’ll have to do might be the affidavits of freedom and intent to marry – basically, you go down a checklist with the priest and he asks you if you’ve ever been married before, if you have any children, if you are marrying this person of your own free will, that you haven’t been kidnapped or coerced into this marriage, etc.

They have to do the affidavits in person and under oath, which is why they need to you come in to get it taken care of, even though your family is active in the parish, etc.

They might have something else that you have to do, but I would suspect that this is at least a part of what they mean by “starting the process.”

Meanwhile, while you’re there, since it’s your home parish, you could get the ball rolling on asking them for a copy of your baptismal certificate (which you’ll need to give to the priest at the parish where the wedding will take place.) Assuming that’s where you were baptized, of course. If your baptism was somewhere else, at some point you will need to contact that parish and ask them to send you a copy.

Post # 7
Member
5670 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

Darling Husband and I did not get married in either one of our home parishes. We chose a church that both of our grandparents were members of to try to find common ground and bring everyone together. When we were ready we simply called the parish we wanted to get married in and told them why we had chosen their parish. They met with us, went over all of the details, and we gave them the contact information to our parishes and they called requested whichever documents they needed.

I have heard of some churches that do not want to sign off on people getting married elswewhere because they don’t get the money for the wedding, they are a business too.

Post # 8
Member
2425 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I didn’t have to do anything like this, even though I am Catholic and we got married in DH’s parent’s Lutheran parish.

Post # 10
Member
35 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Fiance & I were in a strange situation because neither of us were technically members of a parish.  We had attended previously with our parents, but had never joined one together or separate.  We are getting married at his family’s church by my familly’s former priest (he has since relocated to a different church).  We live 2 hours away & have since joined a church where we live.  We did pre-cana in our city, but all other marriage prep (FOCCUS, meetings) were done with the priest who will be marrying us. 

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