(Closed) anyone not having a bridal party

posted 13 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 32
Member
219 posts
Helper bee

My sister is sort of faced with this issue. She and her Fi are doing a Destination Wedding. The guys that her Fiance wants in his bridal party, may not be able to afford the trip. So in the event that he doesn’t have a bridal party, us girl, (me, our other sister, her best friend and his sister) will all wear dressing in complementary shades of blue. We’ll sit up front with our parents, and also do all the bridal party things, (shower, bachelorette party, getting her ready the day of). 

Post # 33
Member
295 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

@MstoMrs – that’s a wonderful idea! my Fiance and I had thought of something similar, having our friends that *would have* been in our bridal party to sit up front and everything…but the coordinating colors are a great idea – they are the something blue, I love it!  I definitely still want my best friends and FI’s sis to get ready with me the day of. I had planned on putting a personal invitation inside their invites for a ladies breakfast the day of, in addition to getting ready together.

Post # 34
Member
38 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I guess I just don’t see the point in it all.  At first I asked my friend to be my Maid/Matron of Honor but since then I’ve moved out of the country and we have drifted quite a bit.  It turned me off to the whole Maid/Matron of Honor idea.  Also, my fiance would have to have at least 3 guys on his side and to be honest he is my best friend, I don’t want anyone else standing up and pretending that they are taking that place.

Post # 35
Bee
1022 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010 - New York Botanical Garden

i don’t have a bridal party and i have never thought anything of it!  Our families will be up there with us holding the chuppah (wedding canopy), some of our friends will do readings throughout the ceremony, my friends will celebrate with me, and go to parties and look at dresses but just as friends!  it’s working out very well and i’m very happy with our decision – for us, we couldn’t imagine choosing some friends and not others, so this was a happy and easy decision

Post # 36
Member
23 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2010

Everything thinks I’m crazy for not wanting a bridal party.   I’ve been in 3 bridal parties, I’m going to be 40 when I get married, and I just can’t see asking my girlfriends who are the same age and already married with kids to put on matching dresses & hold a bouquet for photo ops.   My good friends who matter will be there in attendance & all I would ask of them is to just have a good time!

Also, no gift registry, bridal shower, bachelorette/bachelor party for me or my FH also.  Just doesn’t seem necessary to us, and decreases the likelihood of drama flare ups, things that could go wrong, and unnecessary financial expenditures.  We just want to have a little party with 125 of our closest family & friends, that’s all!

Post # 37
Member
3 posts
Wannabee

I’m also thinking of not having a wedding party.  My ceremony is going to be about 100-150 people so it’s not that small.  My friends have either moved away or we just aren’t that close anymore.  I have a sister, but she’s just a bitch and refuses to be in my wedding and my fiance doesn’t have a sister or a brother.  My fiance says it’s up to me to make this decision.  What do you all think?  I know it’s my decision, but I can’t help but wonder if everyone there will be wondering why there isn’t a wedding party.  I guess I worry too much.

Post # 38
Member
81 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

@mlarson: I understand how you feel. Our wedding will be about 75-90 guests, and we are not going to have a bridal party either. I have two older sisters near 40 with kids, and I’m sure they don’t want to be in my bridal party. I have a younger SIL and 2 younger Future Sister-In-Law, but if I ask them, then I know my sisters will feel slighted. I just don’t want to deal w/the drama and added costs to have a bridal party (gifts, flowers, etc). Our ceremony will be short, and I would prefer the focus to be on us and our wedding day.

Post # 39
Member
113 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011 - in the woods

It’s so encouraging to read that I am not the only one who is not having a bridal party!

Post # 40
Member
554 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2009

i think it’s completely personal and acceptable not to have a bridal party. 

i did have a large bridal party and everything worked out well.  I put this down to 2 reasons:  1.  I didn’t expect my BMs to help out with anything other than to be there on the day.  If I needed help, I’d generally ask my mother or do it myself.  Occasionally I’d ask the BMs opinions, but that was it. 

2.  I paid for their dresses and kept their expenses to a minimum. Most of my girls thanked me for this after the wedding and said it was appreciated. 

Post # 41
Member
129 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

We will not be having a bridal party, aside from having our little nieces and nephews as flower girls/page boy 🙂

I don’t think it’s strange at all… and we’ve been to MANY weddings without a bridal party in recent years.

Post # 42
Member
3214 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

Oh, we’re not having a bridal party either!  For us, it was because it would be impossible for me to choose among my close female friends (not to mention my guy friends!) and having 9 bridesmaids seemed a little excessive. 🙂  And I don’t have any sisters or cousins, so no way to do the “just family” thing. 

Post # 43
Member
181 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Maid/Matron of Honor and Best Man here.

We talked about a bridal party but he has 1 brother and 5 guy cousins (who are like brothers to him). So he wanted those 6 plus my brother plus his two best friends. I had to say no, heck no to that… Considering our guest list is 50 people! lol, there’d be 18 people (if I had a bridesmaid for every groomsman) standing up and hardly anyone in the pews! Which sounds silly… but we just felt like it wasn’t the right decision for us.

So a Maid/Matron of Honor and a Best Man for us. I think it might look weird just having them walk in before me so I may have them already standing up next to Fiance. Then the music will start, the church doors will open, and I’ll walk in. 🙂

How are you bees handling the processional without the typical bridal party and flower girls?

Post # 44
Member
304 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

We aren’t having a bridal party because I wanted my sister as maid of honor and he wanted his dad as the best man.  His dad didn’t want to stand up in front of everyone (he says he’s “too old”), and my sister didn’t want to be alone if she was the only one (“that’s weird!”). So I guess it’s just us. My mom’s worried it will look “lonely” if it’s just us, but I’m of the opinion that it is our celebration, after all.

 

Post # 45
Member
2166 posts
Buzzing bee

We’re not, but were having a Destination Wedding so I don’t think it’s all that uncommon

Post # 46
Member
597 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

We are not having a bridal party. We mainly decided not to because we’re going to Vegas and want it to be just us and an intimate ceremony. Plus, we’re generally not really close with that many people. It’s your wedding and I say do what you want to do. It doesn’t have to be traditional.

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