Post # 1
This kind of bugs me, only because we excluded a few people but INcluded a few others who I don’t care to see at my wedding.
Initially we agreed that we’d draw a “clear line” and not invite anyone from X place (to avoid offending others since we can’t afford to invite everybody). Well, at some point, my Fiance changed his mind and decided to invite 3-4 people/couples from X place. But in the process, we’ve ended up hurting a sweet little old lady’s feelings, when she found out these people were invited and she wasn’t. THIS IS WHY WHEN YOU DRAW A CLEAR LINE, YOU KEEP THE LINE CLEAR, AND DON’T MAKE EXCEPTIONS! THERE GOES THE “CLEAR LINE”!!!
And I’d rather have invited her–sweet little old lady–than these people my Fiance wants at our wedding. IMO, my Fiance decided to invite a group of “haves” who stand out among the “have-nots” of X place–wealthy, fairly well-known, IMO stuck up. These people are not my friends, I don’t even see how they are my FI’s friends!!–not bad people, but I don’t see what makes them so important that they should be invited but not others.
Inviting sweet little old lady would lead to inviting her buddy, the other sweet little old lady, and her husband, and so-and-so, and so on…so I understand why we are cutting it off where we are. But here’s how I really feel: “WHO THE F ARE THESE PEOPLE AND WHAT MAKES THEM SO SPECIAL, WHEN WE AGREED THAT WE WEREN’T INVITING ANYONE FROM X PLACE, FOR EXACTLY THIS REASON??” I hope they don’t come.
He knows I’m a little peeved, but we’ve already talked about it and it isn’t worth a fight at this point. I’m just venting, and wondering if any other bees have had to invite people to your wedding who you secretly hope don’t come–for your FI’s sake or anyone else’s…?
Post # 3
I have one co-worker that I am inviting that I don’t like. But I could not invite everyone else in the group and exclude ONLY her. I am just figuring that I will have so many other wonderful people around and I will be super busy so hopefully I won’t even notice she is there!
Post # 4
I have plenty of people invited that I don’t like. I call them my extended family. Lol. That’s just part of having a wedding!
Post # 5
Oh my yes. I have about five people that I want to drop kick off the side of the Earth that will be in attendance. I’ve just decided to be polite during the receiving line and then promptly ignore them. I have 140 other guests to take care of and can’t be bothered with them. 🙂
Post # 6
Yes, I have at least two people coming that I never ever want to see again, especially not on my wedding day. Oh well, the things the bride does to keep other people happy…and I will do my best to ignore one of them. It may be rude but it was also rude to tell my Fiance that I am a gold digger. Good thing my Fiance knows better.
Post # 7
This is a great thread. Let’s all blow off some steam!
I’m laying it out there. I have 4 members in my family that will embarrass me. Not because they are cute, not because they have funny stories about me pooping my pants. Because they are red-neck crackheads that cannot control their drinking.
Fiance’s family will just have to learn the gene pool I sprang from. End of story.
I plan to focus on my friends while at the reception. lol.
If you are thinking I am a horrible person for admitting this, that’s fine. You are partly right. Lol.
Post # 8
Sure! I think it’s inevitable (unless you’re having a reaalllyyy small wedding) to wind up with a few less-than-favorite people. Mine are a couple of obnoxious cousins and coworkers. I’ve also got another category: people I love but who drive me wacky. No shortage of them either, unfortunately. Just sent invites this week, so it’ll be interesting to see who comes.
@serasvictoria: Thanks for the drop-kick visual. Wheee!
Post # 9
I have one girl on my list (gf of a friend of FI) who I would not care if she fell off the face of the earth never to be seen again. She’s a horrible person, negative, disgusting, crass, crude and nasty. She cheated on FI’s friend many times, and he’s only too happy to have her back, kisses the ground she walks on. She broke up with him so that she could “hook up with other guys in college” and posted it all over her facebook for him to read about, and then TEXTED him that she was ready to get back together after some guy made her feel like a sl*t. I can’t friggen stand her, and hope to god she doesn’t come, but if she doesn’t come, he won’t. Which sucks.
Post # 10
Hahaha you guys are funny! I felt obligated to invite someone (our friendship just really isnt the same) well she rsvp YES, told my friends she was coming, I paid $70 for her then an hour before my wedding she canceled via text. I could have choked her. I could have invited someone I really wanted there. Dont invite people you dont want… who cares if they get upset… its your day.. I wish I would have followed that…
Post # 11
There’s a person who at one time was in the running to my FI’s best man. Then, he and his wife became total *******, and I can’t go into what actually happened, but let’s just say they’ve been talking S*** about me and treating Fiance like he doesn’t exist. I can’t go into the nitty gritty details I so desperately want to yell out about. The ones which really make me want to not invite them, but we WILL be the bigger people. Other people have said they’ve got my back and are getting tired of their S*** So, whatever… She told a groomsmen’s wife she wasn’t going to come… We’ll invite them, than she can decide what she wasn’t to do. If they decide not too, awesome, I’ll be beyond happy. If they do come, I’ll say “Hi, hope you have a great time” and walk away. Afterwards, I know she will also be talking s*** about our wedding, “Oh my gosh, really, these invites came from Michaels! And I’m sorry, but plain cotton table cloths and no chiavari chairs!?” Lol
Ugh, just thinking of this stresses me out, but I’m glad we’re talking about it! I’m also glad to know I’m not alone.
Post # 12
YES!!!! and that person is getting married 2 weeks before me, I don’t want to go to his wedding EITHER but Fiance is insisting 🙁 he doesn’t get that this guy is the crappiest friend there could be. BOO.
Oh, and an aunt that I’m ready to tell to go rot in hell 😛 I’m so tired of doing “the right thing”!
Post # 13
Yes, me too! I’m a supervisor at work and I over see 55 people. I like some of them, but not all, but it’s either “invite all or invite none,” you know, for political reasons – can’t have favorites among your staff! I’d rather invite all to see the few I like than not at all.
@marlew – I’m also inviting someone getting married 2 weeks before me. I think we’re more like “frenemies” only because there’s a bit of competition among us. It’s stressing me out b/c we have the same circle of friends and I don’t want them to feel like when they come to our wedding, they’ll say, “Oh, that looks like so-and-so’s wedding, or so-and-so had this at her wedding too…”
Post # 14
Ugh! i cannot agree more with you bees! I have an uncle i cannot even stand looking at in a picture. he drinks alot then he starts talking crap about everyone and becomes really obnoxious.
i have an aunt from out of town whom we invited that talked so much crap about Fiance and me when we bought our house that i kind of hope she doesnt come! :/ i hate that i feel this way but i completely agree with you marlew, i’m tired of doing the right thing!
Post # 15
I have a Future Sister-In-Law that gets on my nerves that is in my wedding. I have prayed and took many deep breathes. You will be ok.
Post # 16
There are few in my husbands family that I could have done without.. but no one I really really dislike. He has a friend that went to college with us who I have a real problem with and I put my foot down. I understood that hubs wanted him there but seeing him would have made me more unhappy than it would have made him happy, so he didn’t push too hard on that one.