(Closed) Anyone putting off the wedding to accomplish other goals?

posted 7 years ago in 20 Something
Post # 32
906 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

@renwoman:  Oh man!! That’s rough. I watched a girl in my department get married (went to the wedding, even) and did not envy her when she was trying to grade stacks of student exams and juggle wedding planning. I’ve just been working on my dissertation, which has quickly turned into wedding planning when I get free time. 

Post # 33
1268 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 1994

We eloped because it made the best financial sense for us. I would never put off a wedding or a dream or vice versa.

Post # 34
1983 posts
Buzzing bee

Ince my husband and I got engaged I didn’t want to wait. We had already been together for almost 4 years and I was kind of tired of waiting. So we only had a 7 month long engagement.

Post # 35
1646 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

@vegas:  I think you’re reasoning is a good one. If it makes you feel better, my Fiance actually held off proposing to me until he had earned his Masters in Accounting and his CPA because the exam is a total bitch to complete; its a lot easier when you don’t have a wife and kids. . . and then he waited more than a year to propose because he wanted to be a homeowner first.

We’re doing a 2 year engagement (fingers crossed for fall of 2015) so we have more of a financial cushion and because my sister gets married in a year – we just felt it was fair to wait a bit since they had been engaged for a long time and chose their date early this year.

Post # 36
9816 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2019

We have been engaged for almost two years now. Originally we were thinking we would have a 3.5 year engagement, but that is going to be longer because of my illness. I got diagnosed with depression last year, and bipolar and anxiety earlier this year. So right now my health is the priority, and until I am more stable everything is put on hold. Which includes work and my graduate degree. We aren’t going to get married until after I finish my Masters, and have lived together for at least six months. We each live with our parents, and won’t be able to afford to move out until we both have good jobs. So I don’t think 2.5 years is long at all!

Post # 36
198 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2017 - Northern Territory, Australia

We have prolonged our engagement so I can finish my degree, move out and we can travel overseas (a trip that has been in the making since we met). We might decide on making the trip our honeymoon though. 

Post # 37
35 posts
  • Wedding: October 2017

vegas:  We are waiting to get married until both of us finish college. I still have another 2 years and the wedding is a year after that! We have been engaged for 6 months, so this will make it an almost 4 year engagment. We have been together for almost 5 years, so all I want to do is marry him now. But I know that it is wise to wait. 

Post # 38
176 posts
Blushing bee

vegas:  I thought I would be single into my 25th birthday. We are having a two year engagement… Just to afford the wedding on our own and without stress.

Post # 39
280 posts
Helper bee

We’re putting off getting engaged until we graduate with our degrees. We want to have our lives set up a bit more before (degrees and find jobs so that we can save up for everything), want to worry about one big event (graduation) before worrying about another (engagement and following wedding), and we go to school out of state so if we were to get engaged now we would have to tell everyone over the phone…. a minor reason compared to the others but something we don’t want to do nonetheless.

Post # 40
865 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

Yup, I thought I would be single until I was in my thirties! I will be about a week away from my 28th birthday when I marry. Fiance and I put off engagement (and then planned a longer engagement) in order to get more established in our careers, give me time to finish my education, and give us time to save up some money before getting married. On the one hand, it was frustrating because we knew we  wanted to be married to each other awhile before we got engaged (so it was kind of sad to miss out on being able to share that excitement really publicly/ listen to people keep asking why we weren’t engaged yet), but it has been awesome to be engaged and not stress out *as* much about hitting those landmarks pre-wedding. Obviously we are still young and so still getting established, but it has been nice to be a little further along in that process so we can enjoy this time.

Post # 41
37 posts
  • Wedding: October 2015

Of course it makes sense! Fiance & I have had a 2+ year engagement, dating for almost 4 (most of it long distance, due to our studies: he’s doing his Master’s in Architecture in an Ivy League school & I had law school thousands of miles away). We’ve also been best friends for 15 years, unable to date during that time due to many reasons (long story). 

Fiance will finish his Master’s this December & I just graduated from law school in June. Because of this, when we got engaged we thought it prudent to have the wedding in late 2015, to leave time for job & apartment hunting. After my graduation this summer, we booked our venue and photographer & I chose my dress this past Saturday. Next week, we have an appointment with our bakers to design our cake. Point is, there is a time for everything! Even if it seems like a long time to wait, trust me, time flies.

It’s pretty surreal when you finally start getting wedding stuff done after thinking about it for so many years, though! It’s very exciting!


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