Anyone regret not having a bridal shower? FSIL offering and not sure what to do

posted 2 years ago in Parties
Post # 2
Member
348 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2017 - Combermere Abbey

Hi there,

I had my bridal shower yesterday. I didn’t really know what to expect because it’s not common in the Uk and I can also be quite shy but it was really lovely. A room full of women celebrating YOU 🙂 how can that be a bad thing? I did find it awkward opening presents in front of them and having to be overly grateful for each one but that was the only awkward thing. 

Post # 3
Member
3302 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

My thought is there’s a bigger chance you will regret not having one than having one

Post # 4
Member
119 posts
Blushing bee

Maybe you could do something “shower” like without having a big party. If FSIL’s would want to throw one then you could do something like a  Champagne Brunch, or High Tea, Spa appointment? Anything like a sit down lunch thing would have fewer numbers and wouldn’t be so YOU focused so might have less anxiety. It could be as low key as you would want without you feeling that you missed out on anything. 

Post # 5
Member
3450 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2017 - City, State

We skipped all pre-wedding parties (shower, bachelor(ette) parties) and neither of us have any regrets. For us it was a matter of eliminating an unnecessary source of stress and fewer things to plan.

We also just weren’t interested in that kind of stuff. One event was enough for us.

Post # 6
Member
2657 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2016

I didn’t have a shower and do not regret it in the slightest. Darling Husband and I had lived together for over 3 years by the time we got married – our family and friends bought us lovely housewarming gifts when we first bought our home, and we had everything we needed so it felt kind of redundant to have a shower. I told my bridesmaids from the get go that I didn’t want a shower.

I did have a bachelorette party, however, and that was a lot of fun. I think I would’ve been just as happy not having one but it was nice to celebrate with all my girlfriends.

Post # 7
Member
129 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

I did not have a bridal shower and even though I only got married last month, I haven’t felt any regrets about it either. I also didn’t have one for anxiety purposes. 

Post # 8
Member
9725 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

I skipped it. Zero regrets.

Post # 9
Member
2592 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

I politely declined offers for showers for me and my friends still found ways to give me new undies the night before the wedding. I don’t regret not having it but I didn’t want my friends buying my presents and it happened anyway.

Post # 10
Member
1961 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

I didn’t have a shower and I do not regret it.

Post # 11
Member
616 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2017

I posted this maybe two months ago and I’m sooooo glad I did! You can read my posts on it if you want. If I didn’t have one I never would have known (well fully known) how amazing and thoughtful and giving they are. Well, I KNEW they were amazing, I just never expected people to come together like that for me. 

 

It was was a very, very special day for me and I’m so glad I didn’t turn it down.

Post # 13
Member
2631 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2016

I hate being the center of attention and I’m not a social person.  I had a small shower (14 women total) and I’m really happy I did.  I was very nervous about it, but it went well, and I’m happy I had the experience.  I think if I had skipped it, I would have always wondered if I had missed out on something.

 

You just have to decide if it’s something you think you’ll feel bad about skipping or not.  Try not to let nerves get the best of you though.  You can tell the hosts to keep it very small, and that should help a ton!

Post # 14
Member
733 posts
Busy bee

I also have bad anxiety, opted out of all pre-wedding festivities, and am having a small 30 person wedding next week.

No regrets!

Post # 15
Member
9595 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2015

I think its a really special experience. If your Future Sister-In-Law is offering you should let her IMO. I dont think its your place to suggest a coed shower… if she wanted to throw you one of those she would have offered!

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