(Closed) Anyone think its funny how everyone wants to be “invited” to your wedding?

posted 11 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 17
Member
1765 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

Haha that’s so funny, someone actually friended me on facebook again last night because she heard I was getting married–never mind that three years ago, she told me she never wanted to talk to me again! “God is great, beer is good and people are crazy,” I guess!

Post # 18
Member
161 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: March 2020

i’ve started to completely avoid all friends as to not run into this situation. i’m kidding. but it is kind of funny when people ask about your wedding plans in a way that they assume they’re invited and i’m like “eek, you’re not.” luckily i can tell them that we’re having something on the small side, like 40 people, and super low-key. i think they get the hint.

Post # 19
Member
165 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

It is bizarre.  Fiance was doing a little facebook networking and some chick he went on one date with before he met me was telling him she would love to come to the wedding… weird!  Also, I was staying overnight for a weekend event with a college friend I had not talked to in 6 years, and she kicked us out when she found out that only one girl from our sorority (not her) was invited.  So I don’t talk to you for 6 years, and we were never close anyway, and now one night on your pull-out couch earns you a wedding invite?

Post # 20
Member
531 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Haha! That’s so funny that the woman actually gave you her number at the restaurant! Wowzers, thats really odd and rude but, funny for us to read about. Heehee!

 

Mrsmike- your friend kicking you out is absolutly nuts! Not if’s and or but’s about it- she is a crazy person….had another word in mind. Wink What a freaking nutcase!

I’ve had old, old aquaintances pop up out of the blue and say “I’ll try make it to your wedding if I’m not busy then” and I never even mentioned a single thing about inviting them or saying something that could have been misinterpreted. I’ve had folk just say “I’d like to come to the wedding too!” which is a compliment but, still rude in a way- people know we are having a small intimate affair and I think they should be more considerate and not put my Fiance and I in an awkward situation- didn’t these peoples parents teach them to wait for an invite and not just expect to be invited or hint.  This bothers me, especially as this is people we haven’t known for very long.

I have a little private Facebook group for our wedding party and small guest so they can all ask questions etc… It’s an out of town wedding for us and our guests and we plan on spending the whole weekend with most people so I thought this would be perfect for everyone to get to know each other a little before the big day and to share info or whatever, I’ve had so many people that I barely know send a request to join the group. It’s just downright rude to expect to be invited like that. I just click deny and move on.

Post # 22
Member
699 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

We know a guy who constantly texts me and my husband and is always telling us how we are his favorite couple and we make him “believe in love again” (how cheesy is that!). He even got us a bottle of Johnny Walker Blue Lable for Christmas one year! Hello, that’s over $200 a bottle! Granted, we do hook him up with tickets for things but he still pays for them!

Well, we get engaged and decide on the guest list for our “close friends and family destination wedding.” This guy wasn’t on the list cause we are not really good friends with him (despite the bottle of JW). He kept telling us how he really wanted to come and was buying a plane ticket and was just going to come out for the dancing part of the reception. We honestly thought he was going to show up! (He didn’t, thank god!)

Post # 23
Member
944 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

I’ve had people say, “I’m coming, right?” Um, who asks that?! I reply with, “I’m sorry, but we are doing a small family thing. Like 60 people kind of small. Sorry.”  ::sigh::

Post # 24
Member
1020 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

ahh yeah, I had a friend give me a hard time for not being in the wedding party. My Maid/Matron of Honor (who is my best friend AND my FSIL) and another bridesmaid (who is one of my closest friends and a constant support) and I were hanging out with a mutual friend. When the wedding and the fact that the other two were bridesmaids came up she stopped and said “Wait, SHE’S a bridesmaid, and SHE’S a bridesmaid, but I’m NOT a bridesmaid??” True, she was in the same core group of friends as us in high school, but in the four years since she’s lived out of town and is hard to stay in touch with. Later, another time when the wedding came up, she said “I’m not even invited” – an untrue statement – just to give me a hard time! Although I was sure to promise her an invitation when the bridesmaid thing came up, I’m not even sure I want to invite her anymore.

Post # 25
Member
1020 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Oh, and I have some friends who I’m afraid to even talk to anymore because I talk about the wedding a lot and I’m afraid of coming to an awkward point where they assume they’re invited when they’re not.

Post # 26
Member
102 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

I work for a very small company- 6 people total, including the husband-wife team that own it.  Obviously at a company of that size, you invite everyone, or no one.  Let’s just say that I don’t exactly love my job and REALLY don’t want to see my bosses on my wedding day.  Voila, invite no one from work- problem solved.  THEN the wife-boss (I call them husband boss and wife boss) tells me she has rearranged her ENTIRE travel/board meeting/conference schedule, “because obviously I can’t be gone the weekend of the 10th! (wink wink, nudge nudge)”  AHHHHH!  Can I put them in a dark corner behind a screen?

Post # 27
Member
6593 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

Oh My Goodness – This is my new favourite post!!!!!

@CurlySue have fun with shuffleboard stalker LOL

@teamzeewagen your hilarious! I say still don’t invite them (it’s your boss not your friend)

I am also having a small wedding (54 people MAX) and so the guest list is limited and we are only having close friends and family. I have a friend who is a fairly good friend but not one of my super close girl friends and when making the preliminary list she did make it on (As a B lister – not that we are waiting for NO replies but we are waiting to hear about Mr M’s overseas family members before sending out any invitations so there is a possibility of her being bumped off depending on how much family can come)

When I first brought up the wedding with her she said “I better be invited!” 

I was so taken off guard and offended that she was so abrupt and rude about it – she doesn’t even know how many guests were having or whichever – but I just let it pass!

Next time I saw her she said it again and I was really really put off because it wasn’t even like she was asking me about planning or anything just basically that she HAD to be invited! So now I am not sure if I want her there because she has really put me off and I feel like close friends understand your situation so the next time I saw her she brought it up AGAIN and this time I explained to her that she is on the list but depending on Mr. M’s family we would have to decrease the amount of friends we were inviting etc. etc. hoping that she would understand and leave me alone! But then she said “I BETTER NOT GET BUMPED FOR FAMILY!!!!” So now I am just fake smiling and being all awkward – how can she think that she is more important than Mr. M’s family???????

Arg! People can be so rude!

 

Post # 28
Member
2204 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

i had a few people assume invitations or tell me they wished they could come.  SOme of my mom’s friends from church told my mom they were planning to come and she was like…I don’t think you’re invited!  They came to the ceremony anyway (and I have no idea how they found out where and when it was)

But I had a lot more friends and family askwardly ask about the wedding not wanted to assume they were invite.

For example, one lady asked me about my invtations and i described them and she said “I can’t wait to see them!   I mean, if I get one in the mail, if I’m invited.  Or you could show me another time…otherwise…” AWKWARD!

I feel bad for others now that have to go through this.  guest list was the abosolute worst, worst, worst part of the wedding planning!

Post # 29
Member
2007 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

Very.  My fiance flew out to Vegas for a friend’s wedding a couple years ago and when things went bad between the couple a few months later he ended up being closer to the girl than his old friend.  (He had never met her before the wedding.) 

When we first got engaged she was so excited and asking if she could come to the wedding and all that.  My fiance never really said anything hoping she would drop it but 7 MONTHS later she’s still texting him every few weeks asking about it!  I can’t even fathom.  On the other end of the spectrum MY AUNT didn’t assume they were invited and we’re a very close family! 

Post # 30
Member
1700 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

@teamzeewagen  OH, I feel your pain!! haha  I’ve kind of started working on the guest list, but nothing set in stone yet.  But I have heard some comments at work about people wanting to come.  There are about 7 ladies in the dept. and only two of which I would like to invite.  I’m either going to have to suck it up and invite everyone or invite none!  I wish you could really just do what you wanted without having to worry about anything!!  I’ve already asked at least 2 girls to be BMs that I totally didn’t want to, just to avoid any drama….   Yell

Post # 31
Member
2716 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

It’s nuts! After it was up on facebook, friends left & right were all “I want to come! Am I invited?” One is this guy who annoys the crap out of me! I see him at school & he’s always-oh-I wanna go to the wedding! & we’re on a budget! I’m already trying to cut back the reception from 200! I want closer to 150. It gets annoying!

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