(Closed) Anyone TTC in grad school? Am I crazy?? Looking for advice!

posted 4 years ago in TTC
  • poll: What would you do?
    Wait another year to TTC and have a much more costly birth, but be done/almost done with grad school : (18 votes)
    58 %
    TTC this Fall, and if it happens, have a baby with 1 class and an internship left : (13 votes)
    42 %

    31 votes

    ( vote now )

    • Post # 1
    Member
    2 posts
    Wannabee
    • Wedding: June 2015

    My husband and I have been married a little over two years now. We are strongly considering TTC starting next month. If it were up to him, we would have started months ago lol. The only thing holding me back is grad school. My husband is self-employed, so he will be able to stay home with the baby most of the time, as he can decease his schedule and work around it. This will result in some pay cut, but not an enormous amount, and he really wants this. I, on the other hand, just completed my first year of teaching. I love my job, and will continue teaching after we have a baby. 

    Currently, I have great state based insurance for free, but I will no longer have this as of May 2019, and I will graduate grad school in May 2019. The insurance offered through my small, rural school is not nearly as good (or cheap) as the insurance I currently have.

    My grad school schedule looks like this: Fall 2017= 9 credit hours, Spring 2018=6 credit hours, Summer 2018= 0 credits, Fall 2018= 3 credit hours, Spring 2019= 6 credit hours (internship). Besides the extreme baby fever, I would simply wait another year before ttc to where I would graduate grad school, however, I will be doing my internship at my school, so missing work during that time may put me behind with my internship, and I will also be losing my free awesome insurance when I graduate. 

    I know that TTC doesn’t mean we will get preg right away. Heck, it took my parents 8 years and my husband’s parents 7 years to get preg. So, I know no matter what I try to plan it might not work out. But, I also don’t want to ttc until I’m sure.

    So, my question is, what would you do? Carpe diem and TTC this fall, hopefully have a baby next summer, with 1 year of grad school left (1 class and 1 internship semester) with great insurance? Or wait another year, TTC for after I will be graduated, have a much more expensive birth + high monthly insurance, but be out of school or at least in my internship? I want a child so badly, yet, I don’t want to wish I had waited another year. I am such a Type A personality lol. 

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    Post # 2
    Member
    1185 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2017

    TBH it just does not sound like a great time in your life to TTC.  You have to go into it being ok with having to give up or delay finishing your degree and starting your career.  You might have every intention in the world right now of having an easy delivery and returning to grad school right away while DH does all the leg work but I can almost guarantee it will not all go according to plan.  If that’s a sacrifice you’re willing to make then go for it but I personally am waiting until I am done with my higher education and at the place I see myself long-term in my career before I TTC.

    Post # 3
    Member
    2031 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2015

    Yikes. I would avoid having a small child or an infant while in grad school. I would wait if I were you…

     

    Post # 4
    Member
    888 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2017

    For me it would really depend on how much more I would have to pay for prenatal care and labor and delivery with the other insurance. If we’re talking free vs $5-$10k I would want to have the baby on the better insurance even though it would be harder in the beginning. 

    Post # 5
    Member
    442 posts
    Helper bee

    I am in grad school, and I am TTC. My program is mostly women in their late 20s/early 30s so lots of people are/get pregnant during the program, so I don’t think it’s that big of a deal. Since there were fertility struggles on both sides of the family, I wouldn’t necessarily want to wait if I were in your position, especially if you are already in your 30s (if you are in your early/mid 20s then that’s not as big of a deal). The good, free health insurance is also a big bonus.  So, I would say that if you and your husband are on the same page, then start TTCing now.  Good luck with whatever you choose! 

    Post # 6
    Member
    3460 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2017

    I agree to start TTCing now (I would say this either way but especially because of the insurance benefits)! We will also be TTCing while I am in grad school (getting married next month, me starting a 6 year program in the fall) and I don’t think it will be a massive deal, there is usually never a “perfect” time to have a baby. Just because it might be a little more difficult with your workload doesn’t mean it should stop you from doing whats right for your future family!

    Post # 7
    Member
    575 posts
    Busy bee

    I know a few people who managed to write a thesis while carying for a baby. I also know some for whom pregnancy almost ruined their degree. Think: twins + dad MIA. For the first 6 months carying for a baby is a full time job – I highly doubt that your husband will be able to do anyting business-related during that time. And… if he stays home with the baby, it would only be fair for you to do the nights…

    Post # 8
    Member
    2 posts
    Wannabee
    • Wedding: June 2015

    View original reply
    emsie :  Thanks for the input! The insurance difference will be that right now there is no monthly cost for my insurance, a 10% coinsurance on all maternity/labor and delivery, and my deductible is only $300. When I have to change insurance in May 2018, I will have a 30% coinsurance requirement, a $2200 deductible, and a monthly cost of around $500. I know that L&D tends to get expensive, so the increased cost is definitely a factor that I am considering. 

    Post # 9
    Member
    2780 posts
    Sugar bee

    I would go for it. But I’m biased because I’m in a phd program and want kids so TTC during grad school is pretty much inevitable for me unless I waited 5+ years, but then I’d be on the job market TTC which seems worse. Personally being delayed graduating seems better than starting a new job and getting pregnatn right away or having to interview while pregnant. 

    Post # 10
    Member
    211 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2017

    View original reply
    browneyedgirl24 :  This is our exact situaiton. We will wait till i’m on just teaching and writing up my dissertation though in a few years. 

    Post # 11
    Member
    1260 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: City, State

    no personal experience but my bestie had a toddler, a bun in the oven, and a job while doing grad school online. She finished her masterʻs with a newborn but you have to have that determination and drive if you do get a positive earlier than expected 🙂 

    Post # 12
    Member
    1382 posts
    Bumble bee

    I would go for it and TTC now! I will be TTC in my doctoral program (last year while dissertating). As soon as my FH gets his PhD in 3 years and starts his career we will start trying.

    As a professional woman, there is no ‘ideal’ time to have kids. But I would rather have my 1st in grad school (esp since our last year our teaching duties are alleviated) than when I am on the job market or trying to get tenured. 

    Post # 13
    Member
    634 posts
    Busy bee

    View original reply
    awj0513 :  I don’t know how your husband caring for an infant full time won’t significantly impact his income?  This sounds very unrealistic unless he already works extremely limited/irregular hours.  I would make sure you have room in the budget for at least part-time daycare.

    That aside, a $300 vs $2200 deductible doesn’t seem to be drastically different. You assumably will be paying for insurance monthly whether you conceive this fall or in 2 years so the monthly insurance fees are irrelevant in the calculation.  

    If you don’t have any diagnosed health conditions that could impact your fertility, it seems like a huge leap to assume you’ll face the same issues at your parents.  If you’re ready emotionally and financially to conceive on the first cycle this fall then it might be the right choice, but I wouldn’t recommend it if less than $2k and hypothetical fears of infertility are your two primary motivations.

    Post # 14
    Member
    726 posts
    Busy bee

    I’m in grad school and am pregnant. And we ttc 6 mos ago when I was also in grad school and fell pg, but we lost that one. I will still have once class left in my masters program when I have my baby. I am a teacher who works full time and my masters program is all online so it works out for us. If you are motivated enough to do both and don’t mind being busy, then I say go for it!

    Post # 15
    Hostess
    10354 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: March 2014 - Chicago, IL

    If you were say, ABD and just writing I’d say go for it. But with an internship and courses, no way.

    The topic ‘Anyone TTC in grad school? Am I crazy?? Looking for advice!’ is closed to new replies.

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