(Closed) Anyone up for a selfish rant?

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
3758 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I feel like this every now and then too… is it wrong? perhaps… does that change how I feel? no, not really.

Post # 4
1810 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I understand it too.

Could you just opt out of the gift giving? If this is all for one person, I would understand opting out.

Post # 5
602 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Ha,  Sounds like that episode of SATC.  I know what you mean though,  it can really add up after a while.

Post # 7
6394 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

I typically miss at least one pre-wedding activity. Usually the bridal shower, since it’s all about gifts and I can’t afford much of one. :/

Post # 8
1573 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

I used to feel the same way when I felt like all I did was buy gifts for other people’s kids and weddings

til it was my wedding, my shower, it was mahhhhvelous!!

your time will come, it’ll be great

Post # 9
5183 posts
Bee Keeper

lol this is so funny! You should have a self appreciation day! I would totally do this if all of my friends were in the same place! Every other weekend would be a different friend! Give gifts, tell me how pretty I look while I agree, bring me food, awesomeness

Post # 11
236 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

Ugh, I hear ya. I have one friend who has been married/ divorced several times (she’s not 30 yet) and I get resentful everytime I buy a wedding present for her. Um, can’t you just re-wrap the other 3 I’ve already gotten you? 😉

Post # 12
1699 posts
Bumble bee


Good gracious! Those of us who don’t get married and don’t have babies, get to keep all of our income for ourselves and make good investments. Which means we get to become dilletante society hostesses and hold numerous fancy formal evening parties instead of having to put all our eggs in our “one big day” wedding basket. We’re the ones who inherit our mother’s wedding china, because our sisters already went out and “chose a pattern”, so we end up with a full set of place-settings from the outset, and get to focus on adding the fancy serving pieces and settings for extra courses. And, when we come home from a hard day at work and just want to unwind, we don’t have to clean up after other people, or be bothered by someone who leaves the seat up and never makes the bed.

Think of the trade-offs, and luxuriate in what we’ve got going, baby!

Post # 13
7296 posts
Busy Beekeeper

this is too funny. and i totally thought of SATC. which was an awesome episode. i have been to register for one big gift ever since.

Post # 14
223 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I subscribe to “it’s the thought that counts” way more than I probably should. None of my close friends are really materialistic and I have actually never been to a bridal or baby shower ever (if that gives you an idea of what my friends are like)…

My friends eloped a year or so ago. I went to a garage sale and got them a stuffed turtle with a picture frame in it, and also sent along a big box of costume jewelry that has been floating around my closet since my aunt died in 2005. I wrote a card about how much I love them and how I don’t have much cash but I really think they’d appreciate my random gift (she loves turtles to the point of having turtle tattoos, and she makes jewelry on the side… and I know there is another half to their marriage but I have only met him once and he is cool with girly gifts).

And she loved it. 🙂

Post # 15
141 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

That seems to be the way things go though. People are going from wedding to buying a home to a baby (not necessairly in that order). You’re not alone. I had a similar situation -throw a birthday in there as well!

Post # 16
225 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

@babybluz: I am with you on that, and I think it is a valid arguement!! When my brother got married, his fiance(now wife) had 2 or 3 engagement parties and then another 3 wedding showers.. You start to feel a little used, especially if all the parties are concerning the same couple. I havent had any engagement/weddng showers and dont plan on it either, but that was our choice mostly because FH and I really have everything we could want.

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