(Closed) Anyone who has their child in their mid to late 30'?

posted 5 years ago in TTC
Post # 16
9632 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

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gpiglet:  i am unsure what you mean by on my own? i asked my gyn for an RE recommendation after we were unsuccessful after 6 months.  i sensed something was wrong.

treatment is expensive but I was willing to do whatever I needed to get pregnant. we have a mortgage too, and expenses just like everyone else.

we paid for our first 3 IUI cycles out of pocket.  when IVF was looming, I talked to the financial guy and he suggested I buy secondary insurance.  I work for the federal government and have federal insurance (no IF coverage) but I live in a state that mandates coverage.  so to pay for our 2 rounds of IVF, we did have some coverage.  overall, still expensive, but it could have been a lot more.

Post # 17
421 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

I got pregnant with my first at 34 on the third cycle trying, delivered a healthy baby girl when I was 35. I’m now 37 years old and 26 weeks weeks with my second, also conceived on our third cycle trying. This one actually had an even lower risk for chromosomal abnormalities than my first (1 in 8700, vs. 1 in 5500). Fertility issues and chromosomal abnormalities can happen to anyone at any age. Sure you might be at greater risk now than you were before, but I have absolutely no regrets about waiting until it was the right time in my life to start a family.

If you’re at all concerned you can be proactive about it and start charting now to make sure you’re ovulating and so that if you do need help conceiving you’ll be ahead of the game. You can also ask your doctor or gynecologist about tests to check on your ovarian reserve. But in short, I don’t think age alone is something to panic about.

Post # 18
1862 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

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gpiglet:  Not me or a first baby, but my mom had 7 healthy pregnancies and 8 kids (one set of twins).  My youngest four siblings were all born when my mom was in her late 30’s/early 40’s and none of them have any struggles. My youngest sister (the very baby of the family) has mild dyslexia, but it runs in our family as well. Other than some reading difficulties, she’s perfectly healthy and incredibly smart. 

Post # 19
733 posts
Busy bee

You’re going to hear a lot of “I had a baby at 47 and I’m fine!!” stuff, but that’s just anecdotes. Statistically, risks do go up at 35, but they really start to spike at 37.

There are a lot of studies out there, but to start you off: http://humrep.oxfordjournals.org/content/15/11/2433.full

I’m only saying this because I feel that it is important for a woman to educate herself so she can make informed decisions about her life.

Post # 20
2412 posts
Buzzing bee

I had 3 miscarriages between 35-37, then a healthy baby at 38 and another at 40.

Post # 21
700 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

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punkybrewster:  some of the issues listed in that article have more to do more with having had multiple pregnancies rather than age.  The more pregnancies you’ve had, the more likely you are to have placenta previa.  Likewise, you’re more likely to have had more pregnancies if you’re older.

A better study would compare first time mothers of all ages, rather than multiple pregnancies.

The older you are, the harder it is to become a first time mother.  Taking aside egg quality, it may be because of endocrinological issues that arise with age, or it may be because a woman would have gotten pregnant earlier if she were fertile.  Or both.

It’s pretty hard to tell.  All I know is that I read so many discouraging articles and heard so many scare tactics that I was terrified when I found myself single and childless in my mid-30s.  At 37, my then-fiancé and I lied (that we had been trying to get pregnant for 6 months) so that we could see an RE.  I was preemptively expecting to have to do ivf because I was so old, when at the end of the day, it took two months of having good old fashioned, unprotected sex for me to get pregnant at 38.  

The bottom line is that no one knows where they stand until they try.  The OP can’t make herself 25 again.  At age 35, OP should relax and just enjoy uncomplicated love making with her husband for at least six months before she starts worrying on any level.  

Post # 22
575 posts
Busy bee

I was also extremely stressed out – I married at 37, came off the pill right after the wedding and got pregnant two months later. My baby is now 1 1/2. Luckily, in France my age did not put me into an increased risk category and I had a very easy pregnancy and an ok delivery (lo was turned nose up and didn’t want to come out). So I say don’t worry, but also don’t postpone: if you are making excuses to being too tired for sex now, how do you plan on doing it after the baby comes 🙂

Post # 23
894 posts
Busy bee

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blue_cat77:  I’m exactly the same. Married at 37, stopped taking the pill the day before our wedding and started trying right away. Took us 2 months to conceive. I’m 22.5 weeks now. 🙂

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