(Closed) Anyone wish their FI was an only child? Vent on here…

posted 8 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
5670 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

Wedding either bring out the best or worst in people. My inlaws and I never had a close relationship but were very cordial. However their claws came out during our engagement and due to the way they treated Darling Husband and I it has come to the point that there is no longer any contact.

I learned just to not share all the details, and I know it’s hard when your really excited. I remember at one point one of his sisters hated the flowers we chose so much that she got all upset and started crying and turned it into all about her. Really I never knew orchids could make someone that upset especially when they aren’t paying for anything.

Post # 5
Member
1766 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

Be careful what you’re wishing for.  Fiance is an only child.  This also means that he is FMIL’s only child to ever get married.  Future Mother-In-Law has her very own idea of what her only son’s wedding is supposed to be like. I don’t get “I’m only saying…”, I get “Think about it!”, “This is not what the etiquette guides say!”, “You’re really not supposed to…”, or she just developes selective hearing.

Also, Fiance pushed a Catholic wedding ceremony on us even though he has to be dragged to mass kicking and screaming.  His reason?  “This is the only wedding my mother will ever have.”  Excuse me, WHOSE wedding did you say this was?!  Also, “She will never talk to us again if we don’t get married in church!”  Are you sure?! Because you’re her only child and she is dying to have grandkids.

Post # 6
Member
7695 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

I feel your pain. Darling Husband has 3 sisters and I sometimes feel very overwhelmed like I am constantly being judged. I have been with Darling Husband for 5 years and have even lived with his twin sister for 6 months but still, I feel like at times I will say something and just get a weird look or feel like what Im saying isnt valid or good enough. I dont wish he was an only child though because I never had sisters so it is somewhat nice having SILs.

Post # 8
Member
1766 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

Before we got engaged, Future Mother-In-Law was the most easy-going, fun, cool, unconventional person I’ve ever met. I really don’t know where those outbursts of traditionalism are coming from all of a sudden!

Post # 10
Member
387 posts
Helper bee

hah while I feel your pain, especially since you’re marrying the only boy in a family of all girls, I’m with an only child.  Let me tell you that not having siblings doesn’t make it easier.  The parents can sometimes be worse than siblings.  Especially mothers who don’t want to let their sons go!

Example– Darling Mr. LR will be finishing up grad school and moving elsewhere to work.  Well, we found him a wonderful place to live an dthis and that.  They don’t have many of his banks in this new city, so he is probably going to change his bank.  He tells his mother this after we sign a lease.  What does she say? “Don’t switch accounts because I won’t be able to check your account and put money in it if it gets low”.  Um EXCUSE ME?!  A grown a$$ man with an awesome job does not need his mother to be checking his account.  If he’s in a bind and needs help getting on his feet, then he’ll ask for a loan.  Let’s just say, he felt my statement saying we will be changing bank account and neither of our families will have access to it or any knowledge of our financial situation, was seen as a criticism of his mother.  I may be a Daddy’s girl, and I know my parents would have no problem helping me right out of school if I need it, but I think because I have a sibling, I am more independent.

Luckily, he said I can do whatever I want for the wedding, as he isn’t paying for it, and it’s really all about me Wink

Post # 11
Member
7695 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

@aunt pol: I think I get more and more comfortable with time but every now and then there will be that awkward moment and I just have to remember that they cant get me down!

Post # 13
Member
1766 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

Yes, the honeymoon!  Just you and him.  And hopefully, by the time you get back, everybody is back to their normal behavior!

Post # 14
Member
1119 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

That would be really annoying! Thank goodness he’s going to step up now and run interference!

My husband is an only child, so I didn’t have this problem, but I notice (as previous posters have mentioned) that he tends to be babied more by his family than I am by mine (I’m one of four children). So the grass isn’t always greener. 🙂

Good luck!

Post # 15
Member
387 posts
Helper bee

@auntpol: you’re telling me!  He said it would just be precautionary until he gets on his feet.  I told him I didn’t care what he does with his money right now since I’m unaffected, but as soon as it becomes OUR money, no parents. 

 

Oh, and to further my point: when I told him he should put me down as one of his emergency contacts (he already put his dad), just in case, he goes “well, now I have to put my mom.  She would be devastated if I put you and not her”.  That really hurt my feelings!  I should write posts about this haha.  I gave him hell for it the rest of the day.  That’s the worst thing:  his mother’s opinion counts for too much.  She’s the sweetest woman ever, but come hell or high water, I am going to break the Momma’s boy cycle.

The topic ‘Anyone wish their FI was an only child? Vent on here…’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors