(Closed) Anyone’s FI make em’ feel guilty for wedding spending?

posted 8 years ago in Money
Post # 3
Member
3671 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

My fiance doesn’t get why we need favors either.  He thinks a lot of things are more expensive than they should be.  I think it varies more person to person in my experience than just being guys though and he’s never seen anyone spend more than a couple hundred on things like photography and hasn’t ever really seen favors.  For two hundred people I don’t think that’s bad at all though.  

Post # 4
Member
1068 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

I wonder if he didn’t really feel like he could give input since you have already done all the work and figured it out. He might have felt left out. I know that as brides, we come up with all these ideas, but I’ve been careful to not leave Fiance out of the creative process. I ask him about what ideas he has or gives him two of my ideas and ask which one he likes better, etc. Otherwise, you are just reporting to him and it might not feel like he can add anything.

Post # 6
Member
8353 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2011

I think it is just a guy thing. As long as you have budgeted for it, he will come around. My guy is like “whatever” too. He just wants me to be happy. Sometimes, he is like, how are we going to pay for all this, but I just tell him not to worry, we have it covered. I can’t show him the budget though because he starts to freak out. When he asks how much something costs, I usually round it down a bit because of the shock factor. He knows that I am a bargain shopper and that I too, like you, have connections, so we are getting the best deals possible. If he squawks, I just tell him how much we would have to pay if we paid full price. He then just shakes his head and says “whatever”.

Post # 7
Member
5262 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2012

I have the opposite problem… you know when you first start wedding planning and don’t realize how much everything adds up to be? My Fiance will see something he likes and say “why can’t we do that?” – we’re doing cupcakes, and he wanted them all in the monogrammed Anthro mugs. I had to tell him how much that would add up to!

Post # 9
Member
6572 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2010

My hubby was actually very encouraging about spending money. I’d complain that things were too expensive, and he’d say that we should get it if I want it, it’s our wedding!

Post # 10
Member
9053 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

My husband was pretty good, because both our parents just put a set amount into our bank accounts, and we’d decided what we were going to contribute, and reverse engineered from there.  I was able to come in under budget in almost every category, except wedding party/shower hostess/honour guard gifts.

The only time things got a little sketchy was when Darling Husband decided his Vegas bachelor party flight and hotel was coming out of the wedding budget, so I had to squeeze a little.

Post # 11
Member
548 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

Yes, Fiance is having sticker shock this week, now that I *finally* sat him down and showed him the line by line budget breakdown. It’s driving me a little nuts, because I’m finding bargains everywhere I can to keep our budget from blowing up. I booked a DOC on Friday for an awesome rate and he got all touchy about it. Grr….he’s not the one who everyone will be bugging during the wedding with questions and problems!

Post # 12
Member
9029 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

So far I’ve actually suprised my Fiance by finding everything for much less than usual… so he is happy at how low our budget is

Post # 13
Member
1020 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

@lilyfaith: um, at one point my fiance wanted an $800 custom suit. and a $3k videographer. and a $12,000 honeymoon to tahiti. he was out of control…which is how he earned the nickname “groomzilla”.

🙂

 

Post # 14
Member
759 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

i know im a bit late in posting but saw the title and thought “that is so my situation!”

while FH doesnt make me feel guilty i dont think he understands what everything costs and that costs add up. i would like to think that i am pretty reasonable when it comes to buying stuff. i hardly ever get anything without a 50% off coupon and never buy anything that isnt absolutely needed.

then he’ll just look at the account balance and say “what have you been buying!?” and not really even care what i bought! lol

so, i think it’s a guy thing =)

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