(Closed) Appropriate time to TTC

posted 6 years ago in TTC
Post # 3
Member
5109 posts
Bee Keeper

I wish I had more insight for you! I’m not sure how things work in the police world, though. I know at my job, I had to wait 90 days for benefits to kick in. Technically, it’s a year probation though… But if I got pregnant before my year, I’d still have maternity leave. Do you have any female friends in the same field you could ask? My husband is a firefighter and has a female friend who has had two kids. If you want, I could ask her how things are “viewed” and how it affected her position when she got pregnant, because I’d assume she’d have to be put on light duty as well. Maybe start TTC about five months after your new job? That way, you’re close to the end of probation, so if it works right away, you can just wait until after probation to tell them. Then, if it takes a few cycles (God forbid!!) it works out too because you’re not waiting like a year to be established then! It goes by SO quick once you start a new job. I just realized today that I’ve been at my job 10 months already. It seems like it has been 3 weeks! It has gone by sooo fast. You know?

Post # 4
Member
1962 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I’m not a police officer so I have no idea personally. Like the PP I know somebody who works in emergency services (mom is a paramedic). I could ask her how her EMS company handled new employee pregnancies. I know it’s not the same, but having view points from Fire, EMS, and Police points of view may help.

I’m also not sure how helpful this will be, but this link may be useful. It outlines what should be done with a pregnant cop. About halfway through it give advice for women and how to handle their pregnancy on the job.

http://www.policeone.com/police-administration/articles/3326417-What-do-you-do-with-a-pregnant-cop/

ETA: This snippet may be particularly useful.

Years ago I got a call from a neighboring chief who wanted some advice about one of his officers. His department was a small one, and they’d hired their first (and only) female police officer four years earlier. He was frustrated because shortly after completing field training, she became pregnant. She was put on light duty, had the baby in due time, and then came back to work after an 8-week summer maternity leave.

She did this three more times in quick succession for a total of four babies in four years. Since her maternity leave always came during the summer months, this affected the rest of the department’s summer vacation schedule and left them short-handed and understandably a bit frustrated.

The chief took it one step further and concluded that she was getting pregnant solely to get the summers off, and he wanted to know if he could somehow discipline her for her actions. I remember thinking, “Does this guy really think that having a baby in one arm, a toddler on your hip and two more under foot makes for a relaxing summer?!” I told him to talk to his city attorney, but that my recommendation was to let it go, he didn’t have a case.

I later met the officer in question, and she admitted that she lost out on valuable street experience and it took her awhile to play “catch up” with her skills and regain credibility with her peers, but she and her husband wanted four kids and they wanted ‘em fast, so she did what she had to do. She’s now a good cop, a very successful sergeant and a really busy soccer mom.

Post # 5
Member
607 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Personally, I would wait 6 months to a year to start trying. You don’t say how old you are, though, so if you are older and really concerned, I’d go with the shorter end, but if you are mid twenties, I’d wait at least a year. I would think it would be good to get established and settled before making the transition to light duty (which I’m glad is the policy, though!) How early does light duty start?

Plus, if you are in the US, most places aren’t required to give you any mat leave unless you have been working there 12 months. I would like to think a government agency like that has a mat leave policy in place, but sadly, I could be wrong. 

Post # 6
Member
1040 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2010

This is so tough. I know we’re going through a similar situation right now – we’ve been TTC for 18 months, and I JUST started a new job, so we’re questioning whether to take a break or not.

I would talk to other female officers that you know, and see what they would recommend. They might have some insight for you. Also think about how your life would be as a new mom and a police officer – is that something you want to take on while you’re just getting used to a new job?

Best of luck to you, hope things work out!

Post # 7
Member
952 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I think if you can wait then wait. But if its something you truly want then dont be worried about what they will think. I always think the my personal life trumps my work life anyday. There are always other jobs but only a given time that we are able to start a family. Go with what will make you happy! It is a tough decision though but im sure you will do whats best ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 8
Member
1697 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Does your new job know you just got married? People tend to assume that newlyweds are going to leave them cause of getting pregnant. And like a pp said, family comes first! 

Post # 10
Member
1501 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

@Lindsay05:  I agrea with personal life trumping my work life! Got to do what is best for yourself.

Post # 11
Member
5096 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

I am not a lawyer, but…

You should be able to find out what their disability/family leave policy is. Childbirth is covered the same way any short term disability is. And if they have 50 or more employees, you should at least be entitled to 12 weeks unpaid leave under FMLA IF you’ve been there for at least a year. The only caveat is that I’m not 100% sure wheter FMLA covers public-sector employers or just private-sector ones. But check with your HR to be sure.

Post # 12
Hostess
11246 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

I’m in a similar situation. I’m only temping at the moment and when and if I do get taken on permanently I would like to then wait a while so it doesn’t then look back. I say wait a while ๐Ÿ˜‰

Post # 13
Member
1766 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

FMLA covers the public sector, too. A friend of mine, who is a police officer, is currently out on her 12 weeks unpaid maternity leave under FMLA.

Post # 14
Member
365 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

FMLA only kicks in after a year of employment with your employer.  So, ideally with your job, I would wait at least 3 months on the job before trying to conceive.  

Post # 15
Member
927 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Personally I would wait until training was finished and you were done your 6 months probation.

Post # 16
Member
767 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I work in law enforcement so I might be able to help you out…

When I was first hired, my probation period was 12 months and a female that I work with was pregnant approximately three months after our hiring.  There were not any reprocussions although many officers felt she was just trying to get out of the work.  You will be working in a male dominated field and many of these men are still coming to grips of having to work with women, so you need to keep that in mind.

I`m really sorry to write all this, I know you are really excited about TTC, but give it six months, get your probation done and get a sense of what the environment there is really about.  I wear a firearm so I plan on going on light duties at approximately 7 week or so (depending on the pregnancy).  Make sure you have a CLEAR outline of what light duties entails.  At my place of employment someone on light duties are exposed to a lot of danger so having a firm grasp of the job is in your best interest (how to react if there is a fight, etc.)

Best of luck hun!

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