(Closed) Are hostess thank you gifts necessary??

posted 8 years ago in Gifts and Registries
  • poll: Are hostess gifts necessary?
    Absolutely! : (21 votes)
    54 %
    No they are a nice gesture but not necessary. : (18 votes)
    46 %
  • Post # 3
    18637 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2009

    Can you give them something they can all share?  I wouldn’t expect you to buy 6 gifts but a little something for everyone would be nice.

    Post # 4
    2394 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: April 2010

    I think it’s necessary, but doesn’t have to be anything elaborate.   A bottle of wine is always a good choice (assuming she drinks).

    Post # 5
    13096 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2010

    Personally, I think it is 100% necessary.  Those women who are hosting the shower for you are putting in a lot of time and money to put it all together.  The gift doesn’t have to be super expensive or fancy or anything but you should definitely get them something to show appreciation for their time and effort.

    Post # 7
    13096 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2010

    @Mrs.Tillmann: Why does it matter if the hostesses live out of town?  Won’t you be seeing them all at the shower?  I’ve always seen hostess gifts given at the event itself.

    Post # 8
    1184 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    i know i’m in the extreme minority, but just wanted to put in my own two cents that when i hosted a shower for my friend, i didn’t expect or get a gift. she’ll be hosting my shower now in return. i would only host a shower because i i truly loved that friend and wanted to do something special for her, not because i wanted a gift in exchange. i’d honestly prefer a heartfelt hand-written thank you note. but that’s just me.

    Post # 10
    7695 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2010

    Honestly I think a heartfelt thank you card and a thank you to the persons face is more necessary than a gift – I think a gift is just a nice extra if you can afford it. I was not able to afford gifts for my shower hostesses (it was my Maid/Matron of Honor and her mom) because we just had so many expenses. I wrote both of them thank you cards and of course my Maid/Matron of Honor got a bridesmaid gift.

    Post # 11
    11325 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: February 2011

    I think it is necessary, but it doesn’t have to be expensive. A bottle of wine and a really nice letter is fine imo. 

    Post # 12
    6572 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: February 2010

    The people that did my shower were my parents and bridesmaids, so I just got them a very nice gift for being in the wedding and helping out, and thanked them for the shower/bachelorette party all in one gift.

    Post # 13
    5778 posts
    Bee Keeper

    I had never even heard of thank you hostess gifts before I found this site, as all of our showers (bridal and baby) have always been surprises. How would the guest of honor even know to bring gifts if she doesn’t even know when it will be? It must be a regional thing or maybe just traditional in some circles?

    I think they are totally unnecessary and a written thank you is more than enough.

    Post # 14
    4485 posts
    Honey bee

    A written thank you is sufficient.

    Post # 15
    2083 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2010

    I don’t think that it is completely necessary, but it is definitely a nice gesture – showers can be a lot of work for the girls. I also had a larger wedding party, so to cut costs a bit I bought them all bodywashes, a loufa and a candle. The candles and the loufas were cheap and the bodywashes I was able to get from Bath & Body Works with their deals on buy so many get some free. Then did the tag line of “I hope your next shower is as wonderful as mine was!” and wrote them all little notes. I saw it on the bee and thought it was adorable.

    Post # 16
    85 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: July 2010

    One of my showers was hosted by three people together and I was faced with a similar dilemma.  I ended up spending about $90 on hostess gifts, wrapping, etc.  In the end, I wish I could have gotten them something more modest and perhaps even just a card for each–the shower was super informal, minimal food (Costco cheese plates, etc.), and turned out to be pretty small.  I hate that I am even bringing this up, but the thought crossed my mind that I ended up spending more on the gifts for the hostesses than they had even spent on the shower all together (and their gift to me WAS the shower). 

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