(Closed) Are save the date’s really needed?

posted 9 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
2819 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

Save the dates aren’t necessary…they’re really only useful if you’re having a destination wedding, or you have a lot of out-of-town (especially out-of-state/country) guests. People typically send out save-the-dates so that their guests have the necessary information they need to book a flight and/or vacation time…and instead of just sending out invites early (because A: sometimes you don’t have everything figured out that far in advance, and B: sometimes guests will lose invitations if you send them out really early, and forget to make arrangements).

Post # 4
Member
2004 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2008

Will anyone have to travel a long distance to your wedding—namely, a plane-ride-worthy distance? If anyone is going to have to make major travel plans to get there, you should let them know as far in advance of the wedding as possible what date you’ve chosen. But of course, you can’t let them know until you’ve chosen the date, lol. But it’s fine to just call these people yourselves. We did this for all my out-of-town family, long before any save the dates went out. Save the dates are a courtesy (and fun for girls who are into paper products!) but definitely not necessary.

Post # 5
Member
1732 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Save the Dates are a pretty new thing, and not necessary.  At most you could send something with a wedding website listed so that your guests know there is a wedding pending and details are TBA. 

Post # 6
Member
963 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2009 - Bernardo Winery

I agree that Save The Dates are not necessary but really help ppl plan to come to your wedding. Especially if it is in the summer, if they really want to come they won’t plan their vacation during your wedding. It also helps out of town ppl get cheaper airfare 🙂

Post # 7
Member
445 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2007

I also agree that save the dates aren’t necessary. The only reason we did them is because we had our wedding over Labor Day weekend when most people take vacations. I would just let people know by word of mouth when the wedding is as soon as you know the exact date, that way it’s a little bit of a heads up so that they don’t plan anything for that day.

Post # 8
Member
950 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Interesting question…it sounds like there may be a bunch of people coming to your wedding from Chile, which would me that a STD would be helpful.  But since you don’t know the date, would a save the month announcement be out of the question?  I assume you know when your mom & sister have applied for the visa. 

If that seems wrong, than I think an email/evite save the date is totally fine.  You can have it all designed before hand & just fill in the date to send to your guests the moment you and your FH choose the date.  

Good Luck!

Post # 9
Member
262 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

I would just email or keep a wedding website updated so people are informed. 

Post # 10
Member
428 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2009 - Church Ceremony/Reception at The Waterford House

They aren’t absolutely necessary, but it would be nice for any of your out of town guests to know far enough ahead of time so that they can make arrangements.  If you don’t want to hand paper items out, you could just spread the word by mouth, email, or a wedding website.

Post # 12
Member
5950 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

Save the Dates are a new phenomenon, it is not rude in any way not to send them.  You might consider a quick email or phone call to anyone who will have to come from out of town though.

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