(Closed) Are seating Charts Necessary

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
327 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

We went back and forth about this, but Darling Husband and I ultimately decided we’d assign tables (but not seats) to everyone. When guests come in and don’t know where to sit, it can get awkward. Like trying to find a lunch table on the first day of school awkward. Some people will end up at tables where they know no one. Some families will wander around looking for a table with five seats left and be unable to find one. Older relatives may wind up very far from the dance floor or the buffet table, meaning that their evening is much harder and less enjoyable than it has to be. Our guests seemed to appreciate that they were all seated at a table with at least ONE person or couple they already knew. It’s a bit of a pain, but I do think it’s helpful.

Post # 4
133 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Our reception is at waaaay too casual a venue (a brewery) for seating charts. We never even considered doing one.  I think you can definitely get away with it in a laid-back sort of vibe!

Post # 5
2603 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I believe in table assignments (although seat assingments aren’t usually necessary) because I was the odd duck at a wedding once and it made me really self-conscious to be running around trying to find a seat, like I was the new girl at school again. 

Post # 6
2589 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

It depends on how big the wedding is.

We asked our venue coordinator about this.

She has been doing her job for 10 years. She said 100 or under, “totally fine”. 100-150 “ehhhh it depends on the crowd”, and over 150 “you’d be absolutey INSANE” not to have assigned seating.


Post # 7
1734 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

@sarasouth:  Exactly this. It makes people feel more comfortable — they don’t have to ask if they can sit there, and you don’t risk having to break up parties of people who would naturally want to sit together because all that’s left is one seat here and one seat there. Unles you’re having a very small wedding where everyone knows each other super well and serving, etc, is very casual, I think it helps everyone feel at ease.

Post # 8
10288 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011

It depends on the formality of your event and the amount of guests you’ll have but I really think that seating charts are a good idea and will avoid headaches the day of. As a guest, I’d much prefer to be told where to park it than have to fend for myself. I imagne it would be pretty annoying if a social unit has to be split up because the only seats left are singles at random tables. Seating charts avoid that. Yes, it’s more work for the b&g part but that’s the nature of the game.

Post # 9
1231 posts
Bumble bee

I think they eliminate the  “stampede” trying to get everyone you want at a table followed by the stragglers that wander  looking for two or however many seats together. I’m sure your grandmother and her sisters are great but I won’t have much to speak with them about. lol

A table chart gives people a place to go and makes the finding a seat ordeal quicker.

Post # 10
318 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I agree with pretty much everything sarasouth said. I was at a wedding this past weekend where I only knew a few people casually (FH was a groomsman, so he sat at the head table) and there was no seating chart. I arrived a bit before the people I knew showed up, and I spent an anxious amount of time trying not to look like a total awkward turtle poking around for a chair. A seating chart, at least for tables, would have been nice.

Post # 11
10288 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011

@mandypop:  We has 75 guests and I would have never not done a seating chart. When I think of guest counts that would fly without assigned seating, it’s closer to the 25-30 mark. Mayyybe 50 but any more would be pushing it.

Post # 12
4193 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

we’re doing table, but not seat assignments. Need to keep older relatives away from the DJ speakers, plus we want to get everyone seating asap, and make sure they’re with people they’d be comfortable with

Post # 13
2125 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I”m dreading seating charts…but I’m doing tables, not names. I’m going to have someone there to ask people for their names so they can be directed which table # they are at. 

Post # 14
8738 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

We did table assignments. 

We had several guests who did not know each other and not everyone was a couple so we didn’t want to end up where couples ended up having to split because there was only one char at each of 2 tables.

We also didn’t want DH’s grandmother to not be able to sit with her sister and daughter. Or run into the awkward situation where Father-In-Law and his wife ended up at the same table as Mother-In-Law.

Doing tables wasn’t that hard, then people figured out for themselves who they sat next to at those tables.

Post # 15
280 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Some friends of mine went to a super casual, small wedding (about 60-70 people), without a seating chart.  There were three of them (my friends) on the groom’s side, and most of the rest of the guests were from the brides as the wedding was in bride’s hometown.  They decided that they would make friends at the reception, so they sat in the middle table so that other people would for sure sit with them.  No one did.  Other people came and took chairs away from the center table, but no one sat with them.  So the three of them sat at what should have been an 8 person table, alone, while other tables ended up with 9 or 10 at them.  

Was that a little rude of people?  Absolutely.  Would a seating chart have avoided the problem.  Yes.  That’s why we are for sure doing one at ours. 

Post # 16
1471 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

we were debating this too, I thought about past weddings and how much esier it was to know where to sit and not be roaming around trying to figure out where to go and who to sit with, that can be an awkward feeling so we decided to just do the seating chart, in the long run I think it will work better for the guests

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