(Closed) Are you always invited to events/functions as a couple?

posted 8 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Hostess
18641 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

I would invite couples to the party, unless it was a girl’s night out or something.

Post # 4
Member
435 posts
Helper bee

I think it’s rude you weren’t invited.  I wouldn’t go to a party my SO wasn’t invited to unless like MissAsB said it was a girl’s night out or something like that.

Post # 5
Member
2641 posts
Sugar bee

Well you say, former coworker.  Was this just a little meet up for dinner after work, where everyone there was from work?  I can understand that being just a casual non SO thing. 

But if it was a planned event at a restaurant or home, I’d be annoyed.  Also, were any other So’s invited?  Just  curious. 

Post # 7
Member
3176 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I think it’s weird. I would think if they were friends then the former co-worker would want to meet you. Is she paying for everything? That’s the only way I’d get it. Even if you weren’t going to go I feel like you should have gotten an invite.

Post # 8
Member
435 posts
Helper bee

Ok, I’m getting weird here, but is it possible she is interested in your SO?

Post # 10
Member
435 posts
Helper bee

Well at least that’s good.Smile

Post # 11
Member
2077 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

We are almost always invited as a couple to everything.  We don’t always go to parties together (one of us has other plans, doesn’t feel well, etc.), but as far as I know, we’re always both invited.  I was even invited to my FI’s co-worker’s going away party, and I didn’t know anyone besides my Fiance.  It was weird, but I was the only person that brought a gift so I was welcomed very warmly.  🙂

If I were in your situation, I’d be offended.  I’m a pretty jealous person (I’m working on it!), so I would be really put off if a female invited my Fiance to a party and made it a point not to invite me.  My Fiance probably wouldn’t want go if that were the case.  Maybe she has some sort of beef with you that you don’t know about?

Post # 13
Member
2077 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Very true.  I find it hard to find the line between voicing my concerns and unintentionally guilting my Fiance into not doing things.  It typically ends with him saying, “So…do you want me to stay home tonight then?”  And I said, “No, I want you to go out and have fun, I just wanted to talk to you about it.”  He gets confused and ends up canceling to “make me happy”.  See?  Where is that line?!

I would probably chalk it up to just carelessness on her part.  If there isn’t a reason for her to hold any kind of grudge, then she most likely isn’t!

Post # 14
Member
202 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

i’m going to be the odd ball and say you’re way overreacting.  

I have oodles of disclaimers:  maybe it’s a geographical thing?  I’ve found always to be the NYC oddball on this site….but I probably wouldn’t even ever notice if i wasn’t invited to a birthday dinner my FI’s former coworker was having, just because we always do our own social thing at night and meet up later.  

also, honestly, if I were inviting former coworkers to my birthday party (esp if I were paying), it would probably forget to invite SOs that I have never met.  Especially (I promise I’m not undermining your relationship, but you’re a stranger to her) if they’re not engaged/married.  It really doesn’t sound like she means any harm at all.

Again, just playing devil’s advocate – but it’s just one night and you don’t know the girl at all, why would you want to go?

 

Post # 16
Member
2866 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

That does seem a little weird that she wouldn’t just say “Bring her along!” when he mentioned you. But then again maybe the way he said it kind of put her off – like he was looking for a reason not to go. I’d encourage him to go but maybe plan to meet up with him after.

My Fiance just assumes I’m invited to everything he goes to and vice versa (with the exception of girls’ nights) and I kind of like that – the expectation I’m welcome where ever he is.

The topic ‘Are you always invited to events/functions as a couple?’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors