Post # 1
I’ve recently come to realize that there is a good chance that neither my brother nor my SO’s brother will ever have kids … so I may never get to be an aunt. Anyone else in the same boat? I’m sad that I may miss out on this… my friends who are aunts/uncles seem to have a lot of fun with it, without the huge responsibility of being a mom/dad.
I’m also curious- did becoming an aunt affect how you felt about having children? Did it make you want kids more, or did it make you feel less of a need for them? Or has NOT getting to be an aunt affected how you feel about having your own children?
I’ve actually never felt a huge need to have children of my own (and have actually been kindof ambivalent about it), but thinking about never becoming an aunt either, makes me a little sad, and has caused me to think more seriously that maybe having my own kids is/will be important to me.
Post # 3
I have a nephew , but I became an aunt at an age where I really didnt care to become an aunt. I feel bad now that I missed out on some of my nephews milestones because I was just “too young to care” but I have been catching up the past few years.
Post # 4
I am technically by law an aunt to 5 children. However neither Darling Husband or I have any real relationship with those kids, we tried for years. Their parents don’t even have them call my Darling Husband Uncle. I do however have 6 younger cousins (my cousin’s kids) and I love so much. I am able to watch them, taking them on outings, and just have fun watching them grow up. These kids do make Darling Husband and I want children.
Post # 5
Eh, sort of? Fiance’s brother has kids. My sister will most likely not have any. So, when I get married I will be an Aunt In Law LOL does that count?
Post # 6
I am an aunt to 2 nephews and a niece. They are basically my children. I do love to spoil them but they get away with less being with us than anyone else in our family. Being an aunt makes me want to have children for a lot of reasons. I want to have cousins for my nephews and niece. I want my sister and my SO’s sister to have the chance to be aunts as well. I want my SO’s parents to have the chance to be grandparents. But I’ve always wanted to be a parent so those are just added bonuses to why I want to be a parent. It teaches you more than you ever thought it would about being a parent yourself and about your sibling as a parent.
Post # 7
@futureMrsCPT: Yep I think that counts! (I consider my mom’s sister’s husband an uncle, and that’s kind of the same thing)
Post # 8
Yes I am aunt, but in all reality out of all the kids that I am aunt to, I am closest to my niece who lives in IL. She is my brothers child and long story short my brother has nothing to do with her. My parents and I do though and she comes up to MN every summer to visit.
My Darling Husband has nieces and nephews that now are mine also by marriage. Though I really don’t think of them that way yet.
Post # 9
I am “auntie” to my best friend’s little girl, and my SIL is expecting a baby in the spring.
Post # 10
DH’s sister has a little boy, so I’m his aunt (in law). Since Darling Husband has 4 siblings, I’ll probably have lots of nieces and nephews. My brother probably won’t have kids though.
Being an aunt really drove home all the criticisms parents receive these days. I find myself thinking “I’d never raise our kids this way” but stop myself from saying anything because you never know! And I don’t want DH’s sister to be able to say “I told you so”.
Post # 11
I have 1 niece and 2 nephews, and after I get married I will have an additional 2 nieces and 3 nephews! So yes, I am an Aunt. 🙂
I love being an Aunt, it has definitely affected my want/need to have children. My sister had her first when I was only 16 (she’s 6 years older than me) so back then it was just a big reminder to NOT have kids for a LONG time. But now that I’m older and she now has 3 kids I really look forward to having my own. It’s a really great feeling and a really strong bond not only to your sibling but to the child as well. Now, with FI’s nieces and nephews it’s a bit harder to feel that bond, it’s getting there… But Fiance was married before so I don’t really feel like I’m their “aunt” they had an aunt basically from the time they were born and they are older now (the youngest being the same age as my oldest niece)… and we live 5 hours away from them so we don’t see them too often which makes it hard to feel like their Aunt… And I try not to push it with them… I plan on being in their lives for a long time so we’ll get there when they are ready to accept me as their Aunt.
That said, if I didn’t have any nieces or nephews I wouldn’t know what I was missing so it would be a non-issue. Try not to get too down about it… and maybe you having kids would make your siblings think about having kids one day.
Post # 12
I have 8 (10 if you count DH’s step sister) and 2 more on the way!
Post # 13
I do not have siblings, so I was always worried I would never get to be an aunt either. Lucky for me, my husband has three siblings. His sister has a 2 year old son and a daughter on the way (who will be less than 6 months younger than our daughter, yay!), and his brother has a 4 year old son and his wife has two older kids (6&7) from a previous relationship that we consider family. His youngest brother does not have children and may never have his own, but he is seriously dating a woman with a child and we all think they’ll get married, so we have lots of kids running around at family functions.
Since I wasn’t technically an aunt until I got married there hasn’t been a huge lapse of time between becoming an aunt and becoming a mom, and I don’t think being one really affected being the other. I will say that because we watched my 2 year old nephew so much last year, for extended periods of time, I didn’t underestimate the amount of energy watching my own kid can take. But it didn’t change my mind at all- I always knew I wanted kids.
Post # 14
Altogether I have 3 nephews, 3 nieces, and another one on the way. I don’t get to see them as much as I would like since they all live far away. But when I do get to see them, I LOVE spoiling them and playing with them. They’re all less than 5 years old.
It really does make my baby fever worse, though. The newest niece was only six weeks old when we got to see her and I would gladly have taken her home with me. LOL
Post # 15
Between me and Darling Husband we have 9 nephews and 5 nieces. (Note: some of the nieces are technically step-nieces, but that’s really just details). I didn’t care much about being an aunt for a long time–I was 14 when the oldest was born, and then I lived far away from all of them. I still haven’t met about half of them.
But about 5 years ago I was able to be close to two of my (step) nieces, and it did change my outlook about having kids. I was pretty ambivalent about it for most of my life, but getting to be a part of their lives, and watching and helping them grow up made me yearn for my own children. And when it was taking us a long time to get pregnant, I was able to take comfort in being a secondary parent to them (we’re living with them at the moment).
But on the other hand, the newphews on DH’s side sometimes make me rethink it, becaue they’re 5-7, and there are four of them, and they are super-rambunctious, and I wonder how I’ll be able to keep up with a little kid 🙂
Post # 16
@peaches13: Ooh, that’s sweet! I would love if at some point I could be involved with a friend’s child to the point that he/she thought of me as auntie!
That’s interesting to hear that some posters feel differently to their FI/DH’s nieces/nephews … like you’re not “as much” of an aunt to them. I wonder if that’s different in cases where the baby was born when you were already married?