Post # 17
We used to do pretty much everything together, but that changed when we moved cross-country away from all our friends. I have family here, so I sometimes spend time with them without DH. And he has friends through his hobbies that I wouldn’t have much in common with, so he spends time with them without me. Especially now that we have the baby, we spend even more time apart since one person needs to stay home watching her if the other wants to go out and do something fun! We try to stay connected to each other and remember that eventually all our kids will be old enough that we can start doing exciting things together again. We just have to make it that long first, haha.
Post # 18
I might be old-fashioned, but I sometimes hear of a married person who will go out to clubs and bars with other people instead of their spouse. We don’t go to these places anyway, but I especially wouldn’t do it without my husband.
Do any of you bees or your husbands do this? Is it an accepted part of your life? I know “different strokes-different folks.”
Post # 19
I’m not married yet but been together 4.5 years and living together 2.5 of those. We are both in college, on that is contanstly ranked in the top 5 party schools, and we are never without each other. He also works fulltime so that is the only time we are apart. Other than that it is just us and our dog, since neither of us really like people and we’re not your typical partying college kids.
Post # 20
@ksn1219: I like that you’re really young, in party schools, and are still inseperable. I think that’s very special.
Post # 21
@Steampunkbride: this described my relationship wth DH perfectly.
Post # 22
@Bunny_the_Bride: Well I don’t go clubbing or to the sort of bars that are like meat markets without my DH but I do, quite regularly visit pubs when out with friends. In fact we (my drumming group) and I perform in pubs so it’d be rather weird for me not to go in them.
Post # 23
@Bunny_the_Bride: Yes, pretty much the same. We aren’t loners though, but all of our friends are mutual and we always hang out with them together.
I don’t really mind it, except every now and then I want to do something super girlie and I go off alone with one of my girl friends, just like he went to a hunting convention that had no appeal to me with his dad and step brother.
Post # 24
@Bunny_the_Bride: Thank you! We’ve been through a lot in our short lives so it’s made us mature pretty quickly!
Post # 25
@Bunny_the_Bride: We are pretty much always together, unless he’s at work. We typically run most errands together as well, unless our schedules don’t allow for it.
We just like to be around eachother. We are both very independent people, but truly enjoy being around each other. He goes bowling every week for bowling league. In general, if he’s invited somewhere, so am I (save for “dude’s weekend” where all the guys from HS rent a cabin for the weekend). When we have dinner at my gf’s house, he comes, too.
If one of us doesn’t go to a function, the other one will usually not go as well- unless it’s family. And that means if one of us isn’t going it’s because we CAN’T for one reason or another.
It makes us happy to hang with each other, so why not?
Post # 26
@Bunny_the_Bride: We are together alot I would say but not all the time. We both work away from the house and are gone for about 8 to 9 hours a day so when we come home we spend our nights together. Sometimes his friends will come over on the weekend to play poker and I will stay upstairs and clean or watch TV. We usually just spend time at home during the weekend because the winter is just too cold to do anything. We recently got two kittens so we spend every night playing and cuddling with them so I doubt we will be going alot of places now!
Post # 27
- Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA
Definitely not always together.
My husband works night shifts at a hospital 3-4 days a week and some weekends, which limits our together time. He can also arranges his schedule so he can go on trips or camping for 5-7 days at a time.
I work out of town for a week or two straight, all spring and early summer. (I’m making my work schedule for April and May right now, and oh man, I’m basically going to be home ~4-6 days per month! Blah.)
It sucks sometimes of course, but we also really enjoy having a little bit of personal space. And we find that we are super appreciative and excited for each other’s company when we are together, which is saying something since we’ve been together for 13.5 years!
@Bunny_the_Bride: yeah, we definitely have hobbies we do with other people. We love mountain biking and skiing, but if he’s working, I don’t think twice about going with other friends (including MEN! The horror! Lol.) We don’t really go out to bars without each other anymore, but I definitely did with friends (again, including men) a few years ago.
In general I’d ALWAYS rather him be there, cause he’s so much damn fun, but we don’t limit ourselves to only the times when we’re both available. Like @Steampunkbride:
said, we don’t have trust issues and have always prioritized trusting and respecting the other person, so we just kinda hang out with whoever and do whatever we want to. We always want to hang out with each other but that just doesn’t work in our current lifestyle!
Post # 28
Not exclusively, but generally. Most of our friends (except FI’s new law school friends) are mutual friends, so when we hang out with them, we are together. Lately, though, he has been studying so much that I have been going out and doing things solo more often. I don’t mind – it’s a lot more exciting than watching him read! And he goes out with his law school friends without me sometimes. I work full-time, so going to a bar on a Wednesday night or something usually isn’t in the cards for me.
Post # 29
Fiance and I are always together, I haven’t made many new friends here but he has close friends and he never wants to go out. He always says he’s way too tired with work and our kids.
Post # 30
Our friend circles are very different (and it was disastrous combining them). DH and I both travel a little bit for work, and we’re both extremely independent. If an invite is extended to both of us we usually go, but in most cases we hang separately especially since so many of our friends are single. We are together in group settings.
Post # 31
After high school and moving to another country, my friendship pretty much faded away and I was not too inclined to make new friends. I had acquaintances, sure, but not any significant friendships anymore. My hubby was/is in the same boat.
DH loves to spend all his time with me and he has admitted that himself several times. (I like to hear that!) I sometimes need ‘me’ time. But that’s for me. Not necessarily with someone else. We both do hang out with other family members separately. DH has a cousin whom he gets along with very well so they go out and then that cousin’s wife and I get along really well so WE go out. That’s abt the extent of it.