(Closed) Are you changing your last name?

posted 4 years ago in Names
  • poll: Are you changing your last name?
    Yes! Husband's last name all the way! : (189 votes)
    65 %
    No, how antiquated! : (55 votes)
    19 %
    Maybe a hyphenate.... : (23 votes)
    8 %
    Not sure... : (22 votes)
    8 %
  • Post # 46
    Member
    4242 posts
    Honey bee

    ajkklub:  I love it!

    I would never change my name. I’m very pleased with my choice 🙂 

    Post # 47
    Member
    238 posts
    Helper bee

    I don’t think it is antiquated, I would like to see more men take their wives names though. I am ot changing mine.

    Post # 48
    Member
    1888 posts
    Buzzing bee

    I voted “no,” but the addition of “how antiquated!” is much more judgmental than I would be. Changing my last name is not right for me, and it IS a less feminist choice than keeping one’s name. However, it’s none of my business what other women choose.

    Post # 49
    Member
    4073 posts
    Honey bee

    chevaldame:  I will not be changing my name. Fiance doesn’t like my decision, but frankly it’s my name so his opinion (or anyone else’s) really doesn’t matter. 

    Post # 50
    Member
    49 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: June 2016

    I have a quesion (not at all being snarky) , all the ladies who refuse to change their name, did you also refuse an engagement ring? Or did you just forgoe purchasing one? Or did you buy your own? Just wondering if you applied the same principals to the ring. 

    ETA: Just wondering because I have a friend who is very feminist and will not change her name because of her views. However, she wanted the biggest most beautiful engagment ring and her soon to be hubby was quite pissed. And I’m not sure I blame him. 

    Post # 51
    Member
    2753 posts
    Sugar bee

    I’m not changing my last name because my two boys carry that name and my investments and trusts are in my name and it would be a hassle/confusing and a general PIA to do the paperwork.

    • This reply was modified 3 years, 11 months ago by  MissClaudiaCaswell. Reason: Spelling matters!
    Post # 52
    Member
    324 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2016

    chevaldame:  I am changing my last name–I have never been very close with my dad so I am happy to switch to my fiance’s last name. My mom didn’t change her last name when my parents got married and people were constantly requesting more info from her since we didn’t have matching last names/look alike. I’d like the consistency of having our names be the same & not have to deal with the hyphenated hassle, etc. Truly though, I think like you said it is up to each person to make their own choice!

    Post # 53
    Member
    1286 posts
    Bumble bee

    mrsovaltherainbow:  We discussed and agreed to getting engaged. I said I wanted a ring and I offered to get him one, he said he’d get me a ring and declined on engagement ring for himself (but did barter for a no limit trip to the Lego store which I agreed to haha).  He used money from his savings account, but really, it’s “our” money as we’ve already pooled our monetary assets together a long time ago.

    Post # 54
    Member
    131 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: September 2016

    mrsovaltherainbow:  I proposed to him with a cheap h&M ring, then upgraded to his actual wedding band when I knew what he wanted. He wears his band now and will just keep wearing the same one when we get married. I’m wearing my great grandma’s ring as an engagement ring. I know he didn’t exactly propose with it, but I love the ring and well, it was free so why not! I wanted something to show the world that I was engaged! He is paying for my wedding band though, which cost the same as the one I bought for him. 

    Post # 55
    Member
    38 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: April 2017

    I am changing it! I like traditional things like that. But mostly to me, it has always symbolized that you are separating from your family and beginning a new one together. To me it shows unity and I think that is great. We are in it for life!

    Also anything is better than my last name (Smith) lol!

    Post # 56
    Member
    63 posts
    Worker bee

    I have never considered not changing my name. To be honest, I thought it was very uncommon for women not to. My mother, grandmothers, all of my family members have taken their husband’s last name. I am best friends with my dad and close to all of my family, so not having connections with my name would not be the reason for changing it. Also, my last name is simple and somewhat common, whereas my boyfriend’s is longer and uncommon so that would also not be the reason for changing. Until reading this thread, I hadn’t even given thought to keeping my own last name someday when I marry. I guess now you have given me something to think about!

    Post # 57
    Member
    41 posts
    Newbee

    TheGridMonster:  that’s what we’re doing too! Though we are still …negotiating… about which name will come first. Think we’ll end up drawing straws on morning of wedding!

    Post # 58
    Member
    999 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2016

    Not particularly attached to my dad’s family name so I’m excited to get a new name!

    Post # 59
    Member
    999 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2016

    peridot456:  “it IS a less feminist choice than keeping one’s name.”

     

    LOLno. Making the choice for oneself is the “feminist choice.”

     

    Post # 60
    Member
    1241 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: March 2016

    chevaldame:  My maiden initials are SSS, I always loved it! I’m taking my FI’s last name even though it doesn’t start with an S and is totally ruining the alliteration I’ve got going on. I’m not crazy about my FI’s last name but my father is not in my life so I’m happy to get rid of my association with his last name and start fresh.

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