(Closed) Are you changing your name?

posted 5 years ago in Traditions
  • poll: Who changed their name?

    Bride, to the Groom's last name

    Groom, to the Bride's last name

    Didn't change name

    Hyphenated name

    Both Changed names

    Created a new last name

  • Post # 16
    Member
    3057 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: March 2017

    View original reply
    tiffles :  I just found out you can do that. I love my middle name so I didn’t want to let it go.

    Post # 17
    Member
    1446 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2017

    Yes, changing it because I want the same last name as our children (when we have them)

    Post # 18
    Member
    2544 posts
    Sugar bee

    This is the one really traditional thing that I AM doing. Changing my last name to his. I’ll keep my maiden name as a second middle name though which is what my two older sisters have been done. And possibly have our kids have it as a middle name as well. 

    I have mixed feelings about it because I HATE the sexist and old fashioned connotations behind it. I never want to be referred to as Mrs His first name His last name. But I do want to have the same last name as him and the same last name as our future kids.

    And of the other alternatives… A) Our names would be terrible hyphenated together, mine is two syllables and very plain/english sounding, and his is 3 syllables and very italian.

    B) And he shouldn’t really change his because he’s named after his grandfather, including the middle name. It’s a longstanding italian tradition in their family where the Men’s first born son is named after his grandfather that goes back generation after generation so I wouldn’t feel right breaking that up (this also means if I have a boy I already know what we’ll need to name him haha). 

     

    Post # 19
    Member
    3057 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: March 2017

    View original reply
    victoriad :  it’s free to change your name on your passport as long as you do it within a certain time frame. 

    Post # 20
    Member
    468 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2017

    I’m changing my last name to FI’s last name. I would love for us to share a last name because I personally feel like that makes us our own family unit. Not that you aren’t a family if you have different last names (to each their own), but I really love the idea of having the same last name. Aside from being traditional (I feel no suppression or any less of an independent woman for taking his last name), I love his last name!

    Post # 21
    Member
    105 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: April 2017

    I love my last name.  I’m also 35, so I’ve spent a long time with it.  Never married.   It’s very clearly from a non US country and it’s fun to look up on Ancestry and see other people with that name going many years back.

    My fiance has 2 ex wives.  The most recent one still uses his name.  I don’t care for his last name.   It doesn’t seem to have much history associated with it…he doesn’t have a strong attachment to his non immediate family.   He has 1 male child already with that name by the previous wife.

    So for those reasons, I’m keeping mine.  And I hope to give any future children my name.  I don’t want to be one of two “Mrs. HisName” running around.  And he already has a boy to carry on his name…my parents don’t have any male grandchildren to carry on theirs.  I won’t be offended if anyone calls me “Mrs HisName” though…for social purposes I’m not sure it really matters.   If any of the above things were different…I’d consider taking his name.  But it basically came down to a pro/con list and the cons won.

     

    Post # 22
    Member
    179 posts
    Blushing bee

    He’s taking mine!

    Post # 23
    Member
    1080 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2017

    taking his last name and dropping my middle name.  So I’ll be first name maiden name married last name.  I’ll only use all three on legal documents.  I’ll just go by First name Married Last name day to day. 

    Post # 24
    Member
    342 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: Rydges Hotel

    I didn’t change my name just because it was too much hassle to change it. All those documents I have to send to certify I am the same person but I have a different name was too much of a hassle. And I like my name anyway, so I didn’t see the reason to change it

    Post # 25
    Member
    614 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 2017

    View original reply
    tiffles :  I have decided that I will change my last name to my FH’s. We both have long last names and to hyphenate would be a nightmare. I also want to have the same last name as our future kids… My FH’s last name is Russian and it is further complicated because traditionally there are male and female versions of last names. I have decided to have the male version for my last name as well to preemptively eliminate any confusion.  

    Post # 26
    Member
    272 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: April 2017

    I’m adding his to mine. There is no one on my island with his last name and I kind of like that. Haha. But that’s not the main reason. 

    Post # 27
    Member
    2021 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2015 - Ruby Princess

    I had planned to take his and keep my maiden as my second middle. That’s how it is on my marriage license. 

    But– it took 10 months (@#$%^) to get our marriage license recorded. In that time, he asked once or twice when I was going to change my name. I explained I had to have the marriage license to do the first step. After 10 months or so he said, ‘you know, I don’t really mind if you don’t change your name.’

    Any excitement of changing it had faded and at that point it just seemed like an unnecessary chore. I also realized that I really loved my last name, and his is soooo super super common.

    My family and friends do know me as Mrs. His Last, since I was going to change it. I don’t mind that at all. It’s just nice not to legally change anything. I really like my name as it is. 

    Post # 28
    Member
    909 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2017

    I’m keeping my name. Fiance isn’t too happy about it as he’s quite traditional but tough bananas. From the very beginning I always maintained I’d keep my name and 10 years together I haven’t changed my mind.

    Post # 29
    Member
    1140 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2016

    Not changing my name. I’m just too professionally established to change it. My husband is in the same position and he feels very connected to his family name.  We’ll each keep our own. Kids will have my last name as their middle name and my husband’s last name as their last name. 

    Post # 30
    Member
    3053 posts
    Sugar bee

    I was set on hyphenating until I realised it would probably make my life kind of difficult. I have made my maiden name a second middle name as I didn’t want to drop it – it is very unique and I felt like it tied me to my heritage. My new surname is 5 letters long and people can actually pronounce it haha. Win win!

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