(Closed) Are you in a different social and/or economic class than he is?

posted 5 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
1293 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2018

@E_Rigby:  Add a poll! We love polls 🙂 lol

Post # 4
1193 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

We do, but it doesn’t impact our lives at all. We have very similar jobs right now and make about the same amount of money in our “real lives.” I think it would be a bigger issue if we had vastly different incomes ourselves, rather than coming from different backgrounds.

Post # 5
4025 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Our family backgrounds are pretty similar, but he makes about 3x what I do. That has taken some getting used to (especially me being comfortable telling him I don’t have the money to do something. That took a LONG time).

Post # 6
6124 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

Is there is a great income diisparity or significant societal difference between his family and yours?

I think our families come generally from the same middle class background, his parents went to college, mine did not though.  They have never met anyway.  It does not create any issues.

Post # 8
3170 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

His family is very wealthy and lives that lifestyle. I grew up very middle class and always knew that we struggled. It’s a little weird when they are sitting around talking about the country club and and these people I don’t know but whatever, it’s fun! It really doesn’t impact our relationship at all. We are middle class and love our life.

Post # 9
1966 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Yes not between us. But between our families. It doesn’t impact us at all. His family is very different from mine, as far as how they live, dress, income etc. Honestly it’s never an issue or something we talk about. 

Post # 10
5273 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

His family made over double what mine did while we are growing up – but now their income is pretty similar since both homes only have one person working. 


As far as my husband and I, he makes double what I make; but it is just a dollar amount, we are on the same page regarding our joint expenses & savings. However, I will admit that if he made the same as me, we wouldn’t be able to live the lifestyle we are currently living, so him making double does have an impact on our lives. 


Post # 11
1508 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

LAst year Fiance made about 40K more then I did and I make pretty decent money. For us it doesn’t make a difference who makes more because we merged our finances- all goes into the same account.

This year he’s going to make quite a bit more then me – he got a promotion that moved us to a different city so I had toleave my job. I do have work lined up but it payes about $8/hr less then I was making and it’s only seasonal.

As for our families – both are middle class, my familiy has had a few set backs in the last few years so they have less then his atm, but not a huge difference and no issues.


Post # 12
1864 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

There’s a pretty significant difference between my family and his.  His is definitely more affluent than my parents are or ever will be.  It was hard at first because his parents were taking us on trips, giving us money for the wedding, etc and my parents felt bad because they couldn’t do the same.  But, my parents are closer and we do a lot more with them (day-to-day stuff) and when we see his parents, it’s usually a bigger deal.  I love both sides of my family and the difference doesn’t bug me anymore.  Esp, since now Darling Husband and I both make similar salaries. 

Post # 13
527 posts
Busy bee

Darling Husband and I both grew up very, very poor from birth – about middle school.  Then his family was middle class, and mine stayed around the poverty level.  However, I have a BA and he does not.

Currently, we both make about 38K each.  Darling Husband is in the skilled trades as an apprentice, so he’ll make about 80K a year in a few years.  I’m headed for law school, so hopefully I’ll be about the same level in 4-5 years.

Post # 14
10573 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2011

These threads always make me cringe.  I think it’s because class isn’t really a thing here the way it is in other places.

Sure, some people have more money than others and that will affect your social circle to an extent.  It’s difficult to know who is living on credit though and those who could afford to live it up way more than they do.

Post # 15
3222 posts
Sugar bee

His parents yearly income is right around $300k/year, his grandfather is a millionaire, and they’ve traveled extensively throughout the world. My parents make around $60k/year, are immigrants from Laos, and have only ever been out of the country once since entering it.  

His family is really nice so it has never been a problem.

It helps that I am generally more of a go getter and more motivated than he is.

Post # 16
2693 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2008

There is a pretty significant discrepancy between his family and mine.  Our families were much more alike before I even knew Darling Husband (when he was in elementary and middle school) but after his father had an issue and lost a very high-paying job, that is no longer the case.  I was very fortunate to grow up the way I did and it is sometimes nice to know my parents would be able to help us out of pretty much any situation we’d ever find ourselves in (not that we use that as a crutch, but still), etc.  We are very lucky in that sense because his parents would not be able to help us AT ALL in an emergency.  Like, not at all. 








My family is also much, MUCH more welcoming, friendly and fun loving than his.  I’m happy for that–we have a great time with my family.  I’m really glad that Darling Husband is a part of our family now, since I know what his family life devolved into makes him sad.  DH has a really close relationship with my faither in particular and has a lot of respect for him (no college education, built a very, very successful company from the ground up after selling his car to get the start up $$, and is all around just a really kind hearted, honest, down to earth person).  DH has vowed that when he’s finished with med school and residency, he’s taking my parents on a vacation to say “thanks” for all they’ve done for both of us.








Now, as for Darling Husband and I?  Let me just say this: there is no comparing our social/economic class.  He makes no money.  In fact, his medical school education is doing nothing but driving us tens of thousands of dollars into debt.  So, yeah, there’s no contest.  I make the money.  He just studies. 




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