TO waitingwonderland: you said…
Wow I really like your delinations socially, emotionally… it’s so true those matters can affect your life just as much
Oh trust me… when you marry a ton of things (outside elements) come into play. Even in today’s society where folks marry for LOVE, there are also other issues that make marrying one person over another more attractive / worthwhile etc.
Essentially they say in regards to the study of humans, we marry for a wide variety of reasons (although we may say LOVE)
I will admit clearly, that one of the reasons for me is SECURITY… be that financial security or emotional security
I don’t like uncertainty in my world… and I don’t like going thru life alone
I’ve always been this way… so got married the first time for those same reasons (altho the whole emotional thing went off the rails as my Ex was an alcoholic and the years took their toll on him and our relationship)
And family is HUGE too. Altho we may naively think that as a couple we are “an island” this really and truly isn’t so. Unless your Hubby-2-B is an orphan, there are going to be issues with “the inlaws”.
At some point in time, the differences between the two families will come to bear…
And often times that happens once there are kiddies in the picture, and decisions have to be made about things like Birthdays, Holidays, Daycare, Parenting Style, Finances etc. Try as you might to shut other opinions out (or family history… what your spouce brings to the table in regards to their beliefs / expectations “I want you to stay at home… because it is what my Mom did”… for example). This junk creeps in and can really cause stress.
So ya, I think it really really important that young Brides, spend some time evaluating the WHOLE PICTURE. Because even the slightest issue now will be 10x bigger in 10 Years time.