Are You Pregnant? Nope – just fat.

posted 2 years ago in Wellness
Post # 31
Member
1411 posts
Bumble bee

bluecutie00 :  I’m only 26 and have already been “reminded” that I don’t have all the time in the world and not to get too wrapped up in my career. This happened as I was discussing my plans for the next 5ish years and possibly moving to another country for work. I don’t know how I’m going to deal with the drama if everyone finds out I’m not having children…

Post # 32
Member
280 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

bumblebug :  In my opinion, you do though. You do have all the time in the world and you should get all wrapped up in your career (if that’s what you want to do now). I’m 37 (just had my first child) and being 26 again would be awesome! Oh man, move to that other country if you want to. Because you’ll be 37 like me and wonder where your 20’s went!!

Post # 33
Member
1411 posts
Bumble bee

ohplease :  I definitely will! I know they all mean well, but maternity care has gotten so much better since they were young (and it was never great in the soviet union where my family is from) and there’s no time limit for adoption :). Also, everyone in my family has had kids young. My grandparents on my dad’s side are 85 and 83 this year and I’m 10 years younger than their oldest grandkid. So they’re used to young marriages and young parents in my family.

My ownly delay in moving is making sure Fiance is able to move with me without ruining his career chances –  which will probably cause a ~2-3 year delay. But definitely going! I don’t want to regret not taking a chance while I’m young and not settled.

Post # 34
Member
621 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: City, State

I was unexpectedly introduced to a neighbor for the first time when she looked me up and down, and excitedly asked, “Are you expecting???” I calmly replied, “uhmmm, nope”, and she responded, “oh, WELL, you LOOK like it!”………… I kinda awkwardly looked around and just said, “nope!”.  I still don’t get it, and you know what, it really did sting a little.  I’m telling myself it was because of my boobs.  I can accept that.

I can’t believe that not everyone knows by now, to just never, ever, ever ask a woman if she’s pregnant, even if she looks 8.5 months pregnant.  Just don’t.  Once she says she is, then go for it.

Post # 35
Member
1596 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2019

bluecutie00 :  omg I would be so offended b/c even if you WERE pregnant, what business is it of theirs (unless family, and even then I would be pissed)? 

It is my opinion that the people asking are rude/ignorant.

I was always taught to NEVER ask if someone is pregnant. EVER. 

Post # 37
Member
250 posts
Helper bee

Yep yep and yep, in the same shoes as all of you. Actually, a coworker asked me in front of everyone if I was pregnant and when I said “no, absolutely not, why would you ask that?” He responded with, “oh because you are glowing.” So naturally, I had to respond snarkily and said “well I guess my new skin care routine is working” 🤣

 

When I decide to have kids, and I’m past 3 or 4 months pregnant, that’s when I’ll tell you. People drive me bonkers

Post # 38
Member
234 posts
Helper bee

I feel this so much! These past few months Darling Husband and I have been vacationing and I have gained 30lbs this last year :/ I get pregnancy questions all the time and laughed it off at first, but I have to admit it’s getting to me and makes me feel self concious. 

Post # 40
Member
11461 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

stressedlady :  That chart is right on. In fact, I have sometimes almost felt rude because I have NOT acknowledged someone’s very obvious pregnancy. However, I do not do so until the person does. I’ve been on the receiving end of this myself at a gym, and I informed the well-meaning trainer that I wasn’t pregnant, just fat. I also know of people who have miscarried in the range of 20 weeks who still looked pregnant and had to answer questions as to how their pregnancies were going when they had just lost their babies.

Post # 42
Member
6792 posts
Busy Beekeeper

I had a girl at my work ask me, and it was SO inappropriate. She was new, and it was so awkward. I said “No – just fat I guess, thanks…” and left it really awkward LOL.

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