(Closed) Are you taking his name? Why/why not?

posted 4 years ago in Traditions
Post # 106
128 posts
Blushing bee

I might be the only one with this type of  response so I will add it.

I will be hyphenating my name for work and professional activities…and switching completely to his very German last name in every other aspect of my life.

I am not in love with my maiden name in the least bit. My Father is Native American and our last name (like that of most native people) is just an Anglo name attached to us in the era of colonization and ‘Indian schools.’

That being said…it’s an Anglo sounding name and that is a plus in my work environment. I live in Germany and work for as a teacher at a bilingual school and my last name is a clear indication of my desired foreign origins. When I told my middle and high schoolers my future last name they asked me to keep using my maiden name because it’s easier to say…LOL and they’re Germanssurprised

My fiance is surprisingly conservative and without a doubt wants us to have a unified family name—his last name and I agree.

Post # 107
46 posts

I am not married yet, but when I do get married I will change my last name. For reference, I am 30 years old and not very traditional. 

My reasons for wanting to change my name to his:

  • I have a common last name; his is unique
  • He is from another culture and I will be moving to his country, so I feel it will help me blend in a little bit better
  • I am not overly close to my family, so I have no “ties” with my last name, so to speak
  • I’ve always had a feeling I’d want to take my husband’s last name
Post # 108
22 posts
  • Wedding: September 2017

I’m planning to add his name to my current name.

My maiden surname will become a second middle name. I’ll be “Mrs Fiance’s last name” and that’s fine with me going forward. I’d just rather not drop anything from my current name.

Post # 109
2691 posts
Sugar bee

View original reply
libertine_lady :  I am changing my last name and I am excited about it to a certain extent….but I’m sad to be giving up the name I have answered to all my life. It will be an emotional time for me but I am also looking forward to it at the same time. We will be having children asap when able to after the wedding, and want them to share the same family last name. 

Post # 110
155 posts
Blushing bee

As of right now I am keeping my name. I’ve been working for many years to become Dr. My-name. I  just got married last year and didn’t want to be Dr. His-name.


Post # 111
1546 posts
Bumble bee

I am adding his name so I will have 2 last names legally and professionally. I love my last name. It is extremely rare. I am related to everybody who has my name and it has a rich history.

But, I also want his name and to be part of his family so that is why I will do both. Socially, I will go by Mrs (his name). Professionally, I will be Prof. (My name) (his name). Starting for my first class in the fall! 

Post # 112
1036 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: City, State

I’m changing my name. I’m going from something unpronouncable to pronouncable. More importantly than that, I will have the same last name as my fiance and daughter. It bothers me that we don’t all have the same name now.

Post # 113
107 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2018

I’ll be keeping my last name. We won’t be having kids together so I don’t see a reason to go through the bureaucratic hoops involved in changing a last name. 

Post # 114
215 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2017 - Sauk Valley Resort

I’m taking his last name purely because I want the same last name as any future children we may have. My mom was in high school when she had me, and I was given her maiden name, because she wasn’t married to my dad yet. Fast forward a few years, and my parents are married and they had my brother. They all had the same last name, and I was different. I was questioned about it a lot, and it was a pain when it was finally changed (I was 9 at the time) because it’s hard to explain to other kids at that age why you suddenly have a new last name. I just want my kids and I to have the same last name with no questions. Also, his last name is only 4 letters different than my own.

Post # 115
18 posts
  • Wedding: July 2017

I haven’t changed my name, and I’m not sure if I will in the future. The reason I opted out right now is because I’m american and live overseas right now in the EU with my Swedish fiance. I won’t need a new passport and I don’t have to worry about all the legal stuff that happens to change a name since I don’t live in the US right now.

We also don’t plan to have kids, so it won’t be a problem with anything like that if I keep my last name. My last name is also 4 letters – 1 syllable, while his is 10 and 5 syllables! lol

Post # 116
2238 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2019 - Chateau Lake Louise

I’m taking his name. I’m a bit of a traditionalist in that respect. Also, we’re older and won’t be having children and he’s the only boy. I think his parents will appreciate it.

I’m also not particularly attached to my maiden name (not super close to dad) and people mispronounce it pretty much constantly. Luckily FI’s last name is impossible to mistake. And we share the first 2 letters of our last names (Hence, Team RoRo) My former married name whic is my daughter’s, also starts with an R. After we built the house, one of the first things I bought was a giant metal R for over the mantle. laughing

I think it’s a totally personal choice. No one bats an eye either way anymore. I’d say FI’s feelings and yours should be your guide.


The topic ‘Are you taking his name? Why/why not?’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors