(Closed) Are/did you change/keep your name?

posted 6 years ago in Names
  • poll: Did you (or will you) change or keep your name?
    Kept/keeping name : (43 votes)
    17 %
    Changed/will change name : (174 votes)
    70 %
    Hyphenated : (10 votes)
    4 %
    Kept name professionally, but used his name elsewhere : (11 votes)
    4 %
    Spouse took your name : (3 votes)
    1 %
    Came up with a new name : (2 votes)
    1 %
    Other (please elaborate) : (5 votes)
    2 %
  • Post # 3
    16196 posts
    Honey Beekeeper

    I changed my name, and as that’s the “traditional” route, there was no need to announce. I still struggled a bit with the choice, so I totally understand and respect your decision to keep yours. It’s tough either way!

    Post # 4
    279 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    He was going to take mine but I actually call him Hisfirst Hislast more than I call him just Hisfirst, so weI figured it would be pretty silly to change.

    Post # 5
    3885 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    My Mister has a hyphenated last name, which, like your Grandmother, I was surprised to learn that his father and mother both took the hyphenated name.  I like this.  It reaffirms partnership and helps move away from the concept that a woman’s identity is based on the man’s identity, a horrible misconception that permeates our society!

    But it makes this a harder decision because I don’t think either of us want to add another name and another hyphen in what’s already a long last name (and already a source of a lot of confusion, since one of his two last names is a name that can also be a first name, and hotel check-in is always a treat).

    So I haven’t decided yet.  The Mr doesn’t have a preference– I can call myself Pie in the Sky if I want, and he’ll be OK with that– but whatever happens to my name won’t be until months after the wedding, as we’ve already got International travel booked under my current name and I’m not going to mess around with anything till there’s no airline tickets involved!

    Post # 6
    49 posts
    • Wedding: February 2012

    I kept mine. It identifies ME!

    Post # 7
    9824 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper

    I kept mine! I think it’s funny how angry that makes some people haha!

    Post # 8
    9482 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2012

    I am changing my name though I love my current last name.  I am very traditional.  I just see things a bit different than other people, I guess.  I figured that if you didn’t want to take another’s last name then you shouldn’t get married.  You might as well be together, but you’re own individual.

    ETA: I love the bees that haven’t changed their last name and I don’t look at you differently.  I know everyone has their own way of thinking and I completely respect that.

    Post # 9
    931 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: March 2011

    I struggled with this one. But in the end, since we want to have kids, I thought it was the easiest to change my name. Plus I have a brother and sister (whereas my Darling Husband is a only child) as far as carrying on the family name goes.

    I seriously considered dropping my middle name and using my maiden name as my middle name – I still wonder if I should have done that. But as my Darling Husband pointed out at the time, I have a lot of attachment to my middle name so I just went the fully-traditional route.

    That said, it still drives me nuts when I’m addressed as Mrs. HisFirst HisLast. I only gave up my family name – not MY name!!!

    Post # 10
    5657 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: February 2012

    I changed my name to my husband’s. I never really liked my old name. It was Italian… we must have had someone Italian somewhere in our family tree, but overall we’re Czech, German and Austrian, so my name didn’t really suit me anyway. Also it was long and people had trouble spelling and pronouncing it. My new name is Czech and it is much shorter and usually easy for people to pronounce. 

    I always thought I would change my name when I got married anyhow. To me, it’s just what you do. I’m traditional in that way, I guess.

    I didn’t have to announce my intentions at all. Everyone started calling me by my new name as soon as I got back from the honeymoon.

    Post # 11
    513 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    We are considering doing just what your Grandmother did – we are hypernating both names and will both change to it.  Fiance says why should I be asked to do something he is not willing to! ๐Ÿ™‚

    Post # 12
    7977 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2013 - UK

    Am keeping mine. Don’t care if people call me Mrs X, but my professional name (and name in every orther way) is staying the same. It’s been good enough for almost 30 years, and I was born that way, so why not? Our kids will probably take FIs name though. Doesn’t bother me.

    Post # 13
    150 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    I’m keeping mine, and I also don’t think I would be offended if people call me Mrs. Fiance’s Last either. However, if I know people do it over and over again knowingly, that may be a different story!

    Post # 14
    152 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    I’m struggling with this because he’s been married before and his ex kept his last name even after the divorce. It’s hard for me knowing that not only am I not his first wife, but I’m also not the only one with his last name. (Not saying in the world, because he has a popular last name. But his ex wife having it still makes me feel like there’s two Mrs.) It just really bothers me. I think I’m still going to take his name though because he looked so upset and mad when we talked about me not taking it. I had to explain to him how I felt about it which he understood to an extent. 

    Has anyone else ever had this problem? If so how did you handle it? I could use some help/advice. Thank you!

    Post # 16
    765 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    Definitely changing name and ditching maiden name! Its one of the things I’m most looking forward to once were married. 

    I’m estranged from my father and have been most of my life and I have his last name, I’ve wanted to change it since I was a teenager and now that I’m getting married I’m going get to ๐Ÿ™‚

    No offense to anyone who doesn’t want to change their name, it just seems to me that when you get married you should take your husbands name. 

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