(Closed) why choose a friday wedding? pros and cons?

posted 12 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 32
Member
299 posts
Helper bee

ugh. can’t we all just get along! lol. I think whatever you need to do to make the wedding work for YOU and FH is what you should do. People who care will be there. We are most likely having a Monday wedding because we want to get married in a small seaside town 4th of July weekend. It will be jammed with tourists on the 3rd and 4th, so we will have rehearsal and fireworks on the 4th, then marry on the 5th. People will already  have Mon off due to 3 day weekend. If they don’t think it’s important to be with us on our big day, then I would think we were inviting the wrong people.

Post # 33
Member
5280 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 2010

I’m getting married on a Thursday :o).  So I guess I am inconsiderate and selfish, the reasoning behind it was actually to cut the guest list.  Those of my guests that really want to be there for me for more than a free meal and drinks will gladly be there regardless of the day.  I don’t think Friday’s are inconsiderate I think they are actually brilliant, people can party without having to go to church the next morning.  So I say I would prefer a Friday wedding over any other day (shrugging shoulders).

Post # 34
Member
26 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: April 2011

i plan on having a friday wedding for a couple reasons. one of them is to cut costs. the people that are important enough to be there will be there. they have what, almost a year to plan to take off work for one day. and the people that can’t come, well, we’ll move on. and for those people not coming will save us money. we’re planning on having a family breakfast on saturday because a good amount of the family is from Out of Town. the guests can still have their weekends too. so party on friday brides!

 

Post # 35
Member
46 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I also find this comment to be a little out of line. There are many reasons that a couple chooses a certain date. Perhaps it is a day of significance to them, such as a parents wedding anniversary or the day they first started dating. While costs are always a factor in wedding planning, to assume that a couple chooses a date or anything else about their wedding based solely on the cost is (imo) inconsiderate and somewhat selfish.

Post # 36
Member
1489 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I got one thing to say about this post..

let people have there wedding WHENEVER and WHERE EVER they want…If you get invited, consider yourself lucky to be apart of their big day, and I just went to a friday wedding. I felt honored to be part of their day and I went the hard yards and took the day off, drove 4hrs to there wedding and even tho I was tired by the end of it, I was glad I could be there.

Hats off to the friday ladies!!

 

Post # 38
Member
821 posts
Busy bee

It’s cool that you meant something different, but there’s no denying that your first comment was quite rude.

Post # 39
Member
1489 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

heres to moving on… WELCOME TO THE HIVE! 🙂

Post # 40
Member
22 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I am a Friday Bride, this was not done as a price cut but a way to enjoy as much time with our guests over the weekend before we leave for our honeymoon.  Many of our guests are coming from Italy as well as various states.  Having the wedding Friday is allowing us to get together with everyone thoughout the weekend and continue visiting with them.  And by having a Friday wedding the guest can still come to a special event on the Saturday if they so wish.

I do believe that your wedding day is your day, you are gratiful for the friends and family that can be with you and you are understanding to those who can’t. 

If you feel it is selfish then send your regrets, but you know you can always book time off.

Post # 41
Member
5592 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

I’m getting married on a Friday, (July 9) and we actually considered this VERY carefully so as not to be inconsiderate. 

We are inviting approximately 115 guests including 18 plus ones, and about 10 “courtesy invites”. 

30 relatives of my Fiance are from out of town.  They were planning on “making a vacation of it” and coming in on June 30th, in order to celebrate Canada day with a “family reunion” of sorts, and then spend the week together in BC.

7 -of my family members including my parents and sister are from out of town as well, and were planning on being here the whole week prior.

3 – are wedding photographers – who a Saturday wedding would mean giving up a large commission.

10 are police officers who work the same 4 on/4 off schedule as my Fiance.  This particular Friday falls on their regular days off.

15 others work jobs that aren’t regular Monday-Friday, so are able to “adjust” their schedule and just ask to work whatever alternate day/more hours another day.

7 – are teachers who are off work the entire summer. 

There are probably a few +1’s of people that I don’t know about yet that are inconvenienced… but oh well???

Honestly, our wedding taking place on a Friday only caused about 6 of our specifically invited guests to have to take a day off work that they wouldn’t have taken regardless.  We were able to get a fabulous venue that we wouldn’t have been able to book 9 months out, if we’d been restricted to a Saturday.  Our reception starts late enough that if someone really couldn’t get off on Friday, they could make it in time for dinner for sure.

Sorry for the long post, but I hope it shows that the decision to go with a Friday isn’t always a thoughtless action on the part of the bride and groom.

 

Post # 42
Member
248 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2010

LOL @ Cranetobe, group hug!

Post # 43
Member
5592 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

In typing my massive post I missed the addition to the original post. 

No hard feelings, and welcome to the hive!

Post # 44
Member
845 posts
Busy bee

I think we need to be careful about making blanket statements either way. Clearly there are pros and cons to a Friday wedding. If most guests live in town and have 9-5 jobs, a Friday wedding starting in the evening isn’t too bad. Otherwise it is a bit difficult for guests to make it.

I think Friday brides should explicitly recognize that by choosing to save money on the date, they are making it very difficult if not impossible for some people to come. And they should be completely fine with people not making it. When I see statements like “The people who really love me will come”, or “if coming isn’t important to them, I don’t want to invite them anyway”, I think that is really unfair and judgmental. Maybe this is what the OP was referring to – saying that guests who can’t make it to your Friday wedding “don’t really care”. 

Post # 45
Member
511 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

eh…I hope my guests don’t think we’re inconsiderate, as we’re having a Friday AND a Sunday wedding, which are BOTH during the day (Fri @ 2pm & Sun @ 10:30am). 80% of our 68 guests are OOTs, coming from LONG distances (wedding in LA, guests from HI, DC, NorCal, WA, CO, & ChiTown), so we figured we’d make it a whole weekend shindig, throw them TWO parties, & make sure they got to one of the biggest attractions by giving Disneyland tickets as favors. Based on their responses (95% ‘yes’ to our STDs), I don’t think they think we’re inconsiderate.

I think it all depends on the delivery…how you ask makes a difference.

Post # 46
Member
327 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010 - Philippe Park

I’m getting married on a friday and guess what? It works out perfectly for the bride and groom and the people who are paying for it (see: bride and groom).  I don’t think anyone really has room to complain about it unless they’re helping pay for the wedding, and I’m guessing the ones that are complaining aren’t helping financially.

I’m sending save the dates so people know way in advance that it’s on a friday, and I’m aware that some people may not be able to come because of it, but it’s something that I’m okay with. Hell, if someone has a problem with it, I’d rather then not come than hem and haw about it.

I don’t think it’s inconsiderate at all. Everybody has thier own opinions on what, when, and where a wedding should be like, and we’d all save so much time if the people planning stopped worrying about what everyone else thought and the people attending/invited stopped complaining about the bride & groom based on their decisions.

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