(Closed) Argh, tired of waiting

posted 5 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
909 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@Creiddylad:  I totally know how you feel – I’ve been with my SO for years and finally the proposal is coming somewhat soon. My SO and my father also didn’t get along for a while, and while I wanted to get engaged 1-2 years ago, SO wanted to wait untileverything was more stable. It ended up working out better in the long run because SO and my dad have a good relationship now, so it will be that much better when wedo get engaged. It sounds like you both know you want to marry each other so as much as it SUCKs to wait…if you’re patient it will happen and you will be so, so happy 🙂 

Post # 5
Member
309 posts
Helper bee

@Creiddylad:  

 

I just have a question, I couldn’t help but notice that you said “we both feel that we are almost certainly going to be together long term”

I think you need to have a conversation with your SO, and make sure that you are both 100% certain, without a doubt, that you are going to be together forever, before you worry about when he is going to propose.

I don’t think any guy is going to propose for “almost certain”

 

Post # 7
Member
309 posts
Helper bee

@Creiddylad:  

Those are all legitimate reasons, but like I said before, I think you need to have a conversation with your SO.

Suck it up and ask him if he is 100% sure. You can ask this in a way where you are not putting pressure on him, make it clear you are not asking if he is going to propose, just if he is sure he definitely sees you two together in the future, whatever that may entail.

And you also need to be 100% sure. I can only speak for myself, but if I am 100% sure about someone, location, job, family be damned. In the end, its the two of you, forever. Houses change, jobs change, family passes.

In 70 years when you’re old and wrinkly, do you see him by your side?

Engagement will not eliminate uncertainty, most rational people want to eliminate uncertainty BEFORE committing to “forever” with someone

Post # 8
Member
393 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@Creiddylad: Hang in there peach! Perhaps it’s time to reassess with your SO a more comfortable timeline. A girl is allowed to change her mind Smile

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