(Closed) Army officer wives…how do we pick a date?

posted 6 years ago in Military
Post # 3
Member
178 posts
Blushing bee

Hi!  I just wanted to say good luck!  I don’t know much about OCS, since my Fiance went the ROTC route and didn’t have to go to basic, but I know how difficult it can be trying to plan around the Army.  The only advice I have is that when he gets assigned to a unit (or if you already know it), try to find out their training and deployment schedule, since you’ll probably need to take that into consideration.  His schedule might also depend on what branch of the Army he’s assigned to.  If he’s branching Infantry he may have to go to extra schools like Ranger school, Airborne, etc after OCS.  Other branches are also sent to these schools so be sure to check 🙂

Post # 4
Member
1370 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

My Fiance did Navy OCS. I can tell you that the time off after OCS varies. It varies based on the schools he needs to go to, or where he’s being stationed. You probably can’t predict it with any accuracy. I know that’s not the answer but you want, but it’s the most realistic.

You might be better off with holidays, but there is no guarantee for honeymoon time, especially that soon after joining a unit or during schooling.

At this point your best bet is probably to wait until he’s situated somewhere and has a better idea of what the next year or so will bring him.

Officers are usually allowed to live off base right away so you might be able to live with him even if you’re not married. That might be something to look into once he’s stationed somewhere even if it’s not a good time to get married because of a deployment or even while you’re planning a wedding.

Good luck!!

Post # 6
Member
178 posts
Blushing bee

@badgerlove: Are you thinking Memorial Day weekend 2013?  That’s when we’re planning on getting married (Army permitting of course haha).  I know that they are granted 30 days leave per year, and they aren’t always given the whole month off at once, but he could apply for it.  Or he could apply for two weeks leave and be able to have a couple days off before  the wedding, then have the rest of the time off for the honeymoon. 

I don’t think they’d have to use their personal leave days for the Friday through Monday of that weekend. My Fiance got 4 days off this past memorial day weekend automatically.  If your Fiance applied for leave around then it would work well.  (Like if he applied for leave the Tuesday after Memorial Day weekend, he’d get the four days off plus two weeks for the honeymoon and whatever else you guys had to take care of before he went back to work).

Post # 7
Member
127 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

You may have betteblock posting in military too btw

Post # 9
Member
1340 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

It is–at least it’s listed as being in “Military” at the top.

 

Post # 10
Member
1370 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

@badgerlove: He is likely to have the time off for that weekend, a few days probably. Remember though, it’s not a guarantee. But if there’s a deployment coming or some important training they will absolutely work through that weekend. That is assuming he is home and not deployed in the first place. You seriously can’t predict this stuff with enough confidence to book anything. Or I wouldn’t.

You need to wait until he’s at his duty station so that he will have an idea what the schedule is going to be. Are you looking at May 2013? If you are, just play the game and wait until you get a better feel for what that year will bring you.

You can certainly plan to marry that weekend, but don’t get your hopes up too high in case you can’t do it.You never know, an opportunity may come up to do it earlier even.

It’s frustrating, no doubt about it but that’s the lifestyle. You’ll get used to it, lol.

Post # 11
Member
153 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I am an army officer wife my advice is to do a 4 day weekend for military usually its memorial day or labor day

Post # 12
Member
201 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@badgerlove: I’m a military officer myself & am engaged to another officer.  It is very difficult to predict when and where you will be in a year – it makes setting a date so difficult!

The good news is most commanders are understanding about letting you take leave for important life events, especially if you are upfront about it and there aren’t mission conflicts.  Unfortunately, last minute taskings CAN happen – I was almost short-notice deployed the last time he visited me.  And he will have to be careful about starting his leave the Tuesday after a 4-day, as sometimes they will make you take the leave that weekend – you’re supposed to be on leave if you’re out of the “local area” but it all depends on how that local area is defined.

Many military couples take the route of marrying early in a civil ceremony, then having a ceremony later for family and friends.  It sounds like you don’t want to do that, and I’m on that same page with you! =)

One thing we’re thinking about doing if he can’t take leave is delaying the honeymoon a few months.  You can always have a ceremony and then take the honeymoon later if he’s not able to take leave – not ideal but it works!

Post # 13
Member
13 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I just married my Army Officer husband who went the ROTC route so on school and initial training scheduling, I have little to no experience. However, try to aim for a holiday weekend to be able to have ample time to get things done. Also, if he has any Army friends he wants to invite, it will make it much easier for them to be able to attend, barring any deployments or training that would get in the way. We got married over Veterans Day weekend and it made things much easier. The Army (or any branch for that matter) is pretty unpredictable sometimes though so dont get frustrated but I would also recommend taking a realistic approach to things. Wedding planning when dealing with a military Fiance is difficult but not impossible. Just remember to try to relax and look at the big picture because not only are you two going to be stressed about the wedding but the training, schools, and possible duty station as well. GOOD LUCK AND CONGRATS!

Post # 15
Member
1370 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

I hope it works out for you!!

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