(Closed) ARRRGHH! (Waiting Vent)

posted 5 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
874 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

His sister is already engaged? Why is she waiting so long? I think that when people decide to have such looooong engagements they cannot get upset with people “getting married first”. Hopefully your SO will come around.

Post # 4
2118 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

That’s a little unfortunate, but it’s not the end of the world. I would just try to choose a month further away from her date, but I wouldn’t go too far out of my way. However, I don’t agree that because she was engaged first, she should get married first. It’s not your fault that they are having a long engagement. Just make sure you don’t book the same month, and you’re good. 

Post # 5
7211 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2015

@plum_pudding:  oh holy hell. That does suck! I get the whole “my sibling got engaged first so they should get married first” idea but not if they are taking more than 12-18 months max! Two years is too long!!

Post # 6
609 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2016

@plum_pudding:  I agree with PP. I think if you could book a different month from hers it should be ok. I know two couples who got married last year and the groom of one couple was the brother of the bride of the other couple (so brother and sister) and he’s 3 years older than her. The brother proposed to his girl and then 5 months later the sister got engaged. Their weddings were 4 months apart. 

Post # 10
56 posts
Worker bee

@plum_pudding:  A 3 year engagement is really long. If you havn’t convinced your so yet that its okay to get engaged during his sisters super long engagement you still have plenty of time to change his mind.

Post # 12
2037 posts
Buzzing bee

@plum_pudding:  UGH this is annoying!!  Sorry to hear that you are dealing with this.

And why is she waiting so long?  Hopefully she is planning an early 2016 wedding so that you can still get married in the fall?

I do not think this should affect your timeline too much.  I had thought the reason that my SO was waiting to move things forward was because he was waiting for his brother to propose to his long time Girlfriend and get married, but as it turns out, he’s just waiting for his own timeline to progress (graduate, get a job, us relocate).  He def said that it doesn’t matter to him if we get engaged while they are and planning their wedding/having their wedding.

BUT I will say this—when it comes to families and siblings and weddings, they ARE a big deal.  Most people in the family will want to attend, and with weddings come bridal showers/wedding gifts/possible money to be given.  Unless his family is rich, it can put a strain on his family to have to attend two weddings in a year  Undecided  And it’s something that I’ve had to accept as well…that if we have a wedding within 6 months of his brother, that could impact attendance and stress out the family.  It sucks but that’s life.

Just try to hang in there!!

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