(Closed) Article about the “risks” of wearing a big engagement ring to a job interview

posted 10 years ago in Rings
Post # 31
Member
711 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

@FireflyT:  Are you talking about the practice of only the women wearing big flashy rings so that their marital and financial status can be easily determined?  

Post # 32
Member
1582 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I think it’s ridiculous that anyone should be judged at an interview for their e-ring. At the same time, if I had a large e-ring I probably wouldn’t wear it to an interview, because as much as I hate it, women’s looks and marital status can be huge factors in the hiring process at some companies. Sometimes I wonder if I should even wear the wedding band, since some companies don’t want to hire young married women because they might have kids and need maternity leave (the horror!). Technically illegal but… true 🙁

Post # 33
Member
7 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2012

the funny thing is i feel the total opposite of this. i’m a young professional, and as i’ve tried to climb the ladder in the last three years since graduating college the only negative thing that has ever been said about me is my lack of experience. and it’s true, i’ve competed against people 10+ years my senior with spouses and children, when i was 23 with a boyfriend and dog. my fh was ecstatic about being promoted from boyfriend to fh, and we’ve discussed the difference in people perceiving me as older due to our engagement. to me, its hilarious, but i find in my industry i’m taken much more seriously with a fh than a boyfriend. 

Post # 34
Member
28 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I’m sure the article was pretty much aimed at women looking to get a job in that particular industry. But what if the e-ring was heirloom? Mine is heirloom, and trust me.. if we bought one it certaintly wouldn’t be near as big!

 

Post # 35
Member
4497 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I hope the interviewers know the differences between cocktail jewelry and the real deal!

Post # 36
Member
548 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

@leogrl6787: That 100% depends on the company. Some companies see having a strong family life as an asset – you’re grounded, have people to provide for, probably won’t up and leave – others wouldn’t agree, especially positions where you’ll have to travel. But a flashy ring, regardless of the company’s values, could very easily say you and your SO are very well off, so you may up and quit for no reason. Whereas someone who doesn’t have the money for an expensive ring wouldn’t be in a position to just quit their job.

Post # 37
Member
46 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I was once told by a recruiter to wear a suit w/a skirt (vs pantsuit) to an interview b/c the person interviewing me didn’t like women in pantsuits.  Ridiculous, yes.  But you have to do what you have to do.

Post # 38
Member
3696 posts
Sugar bee

@Eva Peron: I don’t think anyone is suggesting that interviewers couldn’t tell the difference, just that in the same way large flashy cocktail jewelry can be distracting, so can a large flashy e-ring.

Post # 39
Member
1012 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

The last thread on this happened right before I was going to start my job search, or right after I had already started it, can’t remember. Anyway, speaking from the other side now, recently employed with a fairly decent starting salary, I can say that I wore my ring to all of the interviews and was judged at some and not judged at others. I could physically see some interviewers’ eyes darting to my hand to look at my ring — and those are the companies who did not even make me an offer. The one that hired me never once looked at anything but my face and my portfolio, and in fact in one of the later interviews I mentioned the wedding so that they would know I’d need time off next year, and the *male* interviewer asked me all kinds of planning questions — where is the wedding, what do you have planned so far, etc. And I wasn’t afraid to answer because I could tell very clearly that he was asking in a genuinely interested/congratulatory way. A week after that I got the job offer, and it wasn’t lowballed at all because of judgement on my ring or anything.

So in general I think it’s hit or miss. If you are desperate for any job, regardless of whether or not they judge you, I’d say don’t wear the ring. If you can shop around a bit and don’t have to worry about being turned down/judged until you find the right employer, wear it!

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