Article telling Millennials who can't afford kids to "just make it work"…

posted 7 days ago in No Kids
Post # 2
Member
4013 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

sboom :  

I mean… no. We can’t afford to have another baby right now, not because I can’t buy the baby everything I had, like trips to Disney (seriously, wtf) but because we cannot afford to put a second one into daycare. daycare for our daughter I s more than our mortgage but my husband makes more than the cost of daycare.

It’s insulting that the article assumes it’s about not being able to give the child luxuries. Sometimes you just cannot do it without increasing your income somehow.

I’m in the US btw

Post # 3
Member
4607 posts
Honey bee

Over a third of Canadians with children said they felt crushed by their personal debt, compared to 20 per cent for childless debtors.

Not that 20% isn’t a lot, but HOLY FUCK they are saying “who cares, be crushed”???

And move back in with your parents? Aren’t they telling us to grow the fuck up and be adults, but now we have to live with mommy and daddy so we can have kids? 

And the worst bit:

“Your main job during the daycare years is to survive and not go into debt,” she said. “You can make up for it later.” 

Gag. Go f yourself global news. 

Post # 4
Member
3189 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2018

“The house doesn’t matter, you have your entire life to buy a house”

That is terrible advice in many cities, literally terrible. I live in a hcol city and buying a home while we were young and childless was the most important thing to us. Right now we have the most flexibility with our finances, will it be as easy to save with children and daycare? Not even close. Then there is the fact that property prices are so high here that you simply can’t do it with only one partner on the mortgage. So the second our bank takes into account the childcare payment our affordability drops and our possible borrowing multiple drops significantly making purchasing a home out of reach. 

What kind of advice is it to tell people “it’s okay” to get into debt for day to day costs during maternity leave/ the first year?! How are you going to manage repaying that once childcare is factored in?

Post # 5
Member
4013 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

zzar45 : 

this!

They say, people make it work… well, duh. People make it work by finding more income with second jobs, or eliminating daycare expense by working opposite shifts, or just by not living the lifestyle they want to live, by sacrificing.

It doesn’t just “make itself work” I hate when I hear that!

Post # 6
Member
322 posts
Helper bee

It bothers me that they’re telling people to move back in with their parents. Umm… Their parents already raised their kids. Run, don’t walk, because their job is done! Don’t move back in with them and burden them with, not only your return but the addition of your spouse AND a baby – possibly more than one! 

That’s a kick in the ass to like… Every parent out there with grown kids. (Especially late starters.)

Post # 7
Member
4607 posts
Honey bee

thebeekeeper :  “How desperate are you for grandkids?? Just let your grown ass adult kids move back in with you!”” 

Post # 8
Member
1458 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2017

 The last part of the article also is advising people if they need to, to take out loans and have some debt for everyday costs that come with having a baby. 

Personally, I think it’s dumb as hell to have kids and not be able to cover these things, especially if you’re planning babies. I would never have a baby if I had to put a stroller on a credit card…

Post # 9
Member
2178 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

This is such a weird article. What on earth is their motivation behind writing this? Maybe the higher ups of Canada are in a panic about declining birth rates. 

Post # 10
Member
3189 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2018

Exactly! No one should be encouraged to have children if they have to put the every day basics on credit. The article just says you can pay it back later, but when is that? The first few years are actually the least expensive so if you can’t afford that how are you going to afford daycare, more food, more expensive clothes etc when they are bigger AND pay back your day to day living from the first year?!

sarathemermaid :  

Post # 11
Member
8852 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

I mean, I feel like that’s what a lot of my friends/family my age are doing. I seriously don’t get how they are affording kids. I’d be way too stressed out about money to have a kid right now.

Post # 12
Member
8949 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2016

I mean, I could afford three kids however I cannot afford childcare for three kids. 

Post # 13
Member
1277 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

sboom :  I dunno… I kind of agree with the article a little bit, though I think it’s clumsily written. 

I’m Australian, so not sure about the economical state of things in Canada, but here in my city, the average house is $800,000.  Units aren’t much cheaper.  To get to under $500,000 you have to move into the outlier suburbs which is often far away from jobs and family.  Most people I know who are staying in this city are just accepting they will never own a house (unless inheritance), and there is nothing wrong with renting.  Even if you could afford the deposit on a $500,000 house, mortgage repayments would be difficult to keep up with on one wage and if something were to happen to the house like a plumbing or electrical issue, you’d have to find the cash.  We are tossing up having our deposit sitting there waiting while we rent while I go on maternity leave, and buy as soon as I’m back in the workforce. 

They are saying you should focus on getting rid of bad debt first which I think is a good thing. 

I disagree with the moving in with the parents thing, but then I know couples who have done it for 6 months to save and their parents have been happy to.  If everyone is happy with it and it’s for a fixed term, well why not?  I’ll be moving interstate in about 12 months and will be living with my grandma for a few months while I get a job and house and I’ll be 28.  Westeners are particularly against multi-generational living but it’s the norm in many cultures, and will become more common as housing costs increase. 

I have a few friends who had children really young (16-23) and though it was really hard for them then and money was tight, their kids are starting to go to school now and they are getting back into their careers and are financially doing quite well.  A couple of them have bought houses this year.  I’m almost envious of them since I am now in my late 20’s and my career break will be more signiciant than just holding off for a few years before starting a career. 

Not everyone can have all their ducks in a row before having children.  As long as you have a roof over your head, some money in the bank and are up to date on bills, you can work it out.  I agree it doesn’t passively work itself out though – it does require sacrifice and responsibility from the parents. 

There are also risks in being older parents ie. health problems in children, death or disability of the parents, fertility issues that need to be weighed up.   One of my dear friends is one of those women who were put on this earth to be a mother.  She is incredible with children, caring and compassionate and has been trying for one of her own for the last 2 years.  She’s 38 and was just told she’s in early menopause and she’s not a strong candidate for IVF.  She wanted to wait until everything was perfect, and now she’s pretty much missed out. 

There’s a balance between not living in poverty, and waiting too long to get too many ducks in a row. 

 

Post # 14
Member
1440 posts
Bumble bee

jellybellynelly :  And suggesting moving back in with parents as if that’s a decision only to be made by the adult child. What if the parents don’t want their kid back in the home. And definitely don’t want a new baby in the home. They had children for 18+ years, I think they might want a reprieve to have adult time.

Post # 15
Member
171 posts
Blushing bee

Reading that article made me a bit sick. You’re right, OP. They never even mentioned not having children as a viable option. Who paid for this crap article to be written?!?! Who says adult parents will all automatically want or be able to have their adult children live with them for free?

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