Post # 17
@Christy42213: confused. I didn’t think I was being snotty (definitely didn’t intend to be) and I started off by clearly saying that I think some bees’ advice made a lot of sense and I’m taking it- changing outfits will probably work best for me for summer weddings. In my response to you, I was just clarifying that I didn’t have a question regarding black tie events (since that dress code is much narrower in terms of what’s appropriate). I apologize for anything that came off as snotty. to other posters, I either responded to questions they asked, etc. or just clarified that sweaters weren’t an option due to weather.
Post # 18
I don’t think there’s anything wrong or showy about changing in between. I thought it was expected of guests to do so. I believe in dressing for the occasion…so at a daytime ceremony at a religious establishment, I’ll wear a modest day dress and for an evening reception, I would change into something more appropriate, depending on their dress code.
If there wasn’t an opportunity to change, then I guess I’d rather be overdressed (but covered up with a shawl, bolero or similar) at the church than underdressed at the reception.
Post # 19
- Wedding: April 2013 - Rhode Island
@Shkragoldfish: I guess I misinterpreted your tone. I can be overly touchy. I’m sorry.
Post # 20
regarding the ask the bride/groom suggestions a cpl of PPs made – I was more curious (and many have been helpfully answering) about what bees do when the dress code is known- just the typical US semi-formal wedding. For US semi-formal, there’s a huge variety of what’s okay to wear during daytime and nighttime- it’s a judgment call every female guest makes- it’s interesting to see what ppl’s opinions and strategies on it are. also good to know that it’s not clearly-accepted rule that every guest’s shoulders have to be covered during a church ceremony
I see that bees have different opinions on this, but I’m not sure that whether a guest changes clothes or wears something more nighttime or more daytime is something I’d bother the bride with (especially if not close to her) or that she’d even have an opinion on or want to decide.
@Christy42213: no apology needed at all. I also think it’s kinda cool that your dress code was black tie preferred. I feel like that’d give me the push I needed to feel comfortable wearing the more typical “nighttime” look during the day, in church. so few ppl I know have black tie events & having an excuse to wear the one formal dress I own more often would be great. I’m also toying with the idea of dyeing my wedding dress, so I’d need more black tie events to wear that at afterward too.
Post # 20
I always thought it was still safe to wear short sleeve or sleeveless dress (not strapless!), hemline a bit above the knee and neckline with minimal cleavage…. its hard to wear a full length gown and cover up with the scorching summer days in Australia.
I have a black tie wedding to go to with a church wedding in the morning and then a fancy function at night, so I plan to stick to the same dress. I’ll only change if something gets spilt on it or it gets dirty in the day.
Regardless if it says black tie or not, I’ve seen girls at church weddings wear dresses from short sleeve tight fitting, strapless short, strapless long, maxi and just normal short sleeve. No matter what, there will always be that 1 person who will wear something different to everybody else..
Post # 21
According to etiquette you can certainly wear a knee-length cocktail dress to a black tie event. However, the fabric and style should differ from a daytime dress. Elaborate beading, very formal fabrics (silk satin, brocade, velvet) are not suitable for a morning or early afternoon event as they are clearly evening fabrics.
I always change for formal weddings that have a morning or early afternoon ceremony and a dinner component. I only attended one wedding in my entire life that was what I would consider truly informal (linen suits for men and light summer dresses for women) where nobody changed clothes as the sun set, everything else involved hats, skirt suits, dresses and morning dress for the gentlemen, and long frocks and dinner jackets in the evening.
Post # 22
- Wedding: May 2015 - Walnut Hill Bed & Breakfast
I usually wear a cardigan to the church with my dress. Most weddings start in the afternoon and are more summery-casual so I usually go for a sundress type dress. But I live in southwest pa where as long as you’re not wearing jeans or workout gear, you’re considered ‘dressed up’.
Post # 23
I’ve been to several weddings that had daytime ceremonies and then evening receptions. At all but 2 of them I changed into a different outfit for the reception. The two that I didn’t change for, were more casual type of receptions. One was at a restaurant on the beach and the other was at a casualish restaurant/venue so the outfit I wore to the ceremony was fine.
I usually wear something lighter colored or brighter colors- with little to no accessories and lighter makeup- basically wear what you would wear to church or expect people to wear to church.
At the reception depending on where it is/dress code that is expected, I would wear either a cocktail dress or a gown. Both options would be more formal and more appropriate for an evening event, than what I would wear to the ceremony.