(Closed) Asked my friend to be bridemaid but haven't heard from her since

posted 5 years ago in Bridesmaids
  • poll:

    she doesnt want to be in the bridal party/she should contact me

    she is just waiting for me and i should reach out

  • Post # 2
    Hostess
    1503 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: City, State

    View original reply
    trish143:  I would reach out one time and if she doesn’t answer and maybe leave a message or text her telling her that you need to speak with her to finalize the details by x date and if she does not call you back by that date then you have your answer. For what it’s worth I’m sorry that she’s been (maybe) blowing you off, but the people you need around you for your wedding are people who will support you and if she is not willing to do that then maybe it’s time to reevaluate your friendship. Best of luck!

    Post # 3
    Member
    9882 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    You asked really far out, so there really isn’t much for her to do. What kind of plans are you expecting her to reach out about?

    I’d reach out to her, separate from the bridesmaid issue, and just talk about what’s going on in her life.  

    Post # 4
    Member
    30390 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    View original reply
    trish143:  You asked her. She said yes.I think she is likely waiting for you to contact her with some information about the wedding, the Bridesmaid or Best Man dress etc.

    Contact her.

    Post # 5
    Member
    6342 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: April 2016

    Honestly what do you expect her to have reached out to ask you about so far? The wedding is still far off. She’s probably waiting to hear from you. 

    Post # 6
    Member
    19 posts
    Newbee

    Just talk to her. 

    some BMs are super excited and proactive in planning and leading the rest of the Bridesmaid or Best Man. Others might just take a back seat and wait until someone else leads. 

    she just might be waiting for someone (MOH? You?) to kick things off. 

    Post # 7
    Member
    538 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    Why is a MOH’s role “too much work”?  What exactly do you expect your Maid/Matron of Honor  to “work” on?  If you are thinking that your bridesmaids are also wedding workers  that may be why you haven’t heard from her.

     

    Post # 9
    Member
    1042 posts
    Bumble bee

    Your wedding is over a year away, so I don’t think it’s odd that she hasn’t asked about wedding stuff yet. Heck, my whole engagement will have been less than a year. I would reach out to her just to say hi! If you keep up the contact pre-wedding, it will keep you from having a distant aquaintance for a bridesmaid 🙂

    Post # 10
    Member
    1189 posts
    Bumble bee

    View original reply
    trish143:  I think you should reach out! I don’t think it’s odd that she hasn’t. I wouldn’t, in her place. Send an email and see what happens! Based on what you said I don’t think she’s blowing you off, I think she’s just letting you get the ball rolling.

    Fwiw, one reason I wouldn’t reach out in her position is fear that my friend changed her mind. I would def wait for you to send me an email, even if I was excited about it.

    Post # 11
    Member
    2979 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2017

    You said yourself that you usually go for months without talking. Who usually messages who after that time? Maybe she isn’t expecting any bridal related stuff since your wedding is still a year away?

     

    Post # 12
    Member
    2125 posts
    Buzzing bee

    It doesn’t sound strange to me that you haven’t heard from her. Your wedding is a year away, and there’s really nothing for bridesmaids to plan…

    Are you expecting her to DO something, or just show interest? If you’re just expecting her to show interest, she may end up being more interested near the end, when the wedding is getting close. 

    I would suggest reaching out to her, but don’t make it all about the wedding. Just say hi and chat like you normally would. Ask about HER life. 

    And have fun wedding planning!

    Post # 14
    Member
    6342 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: April 2016

    View original reply
    trish143:  Wait what? I’m confused as to what happened? She did reply back to you? Or she didn’t?

    The topic ‘Asked my friend to be bridemaid but haven't heard from her since’ is closed to new replies.

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