(Closed) Asked my friend to be in my DW; she said No. She now asked me to be in hers?

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
4693 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I would have said yes too, she couldn’t afford to be your bridesmaid, that’s no reason not to be hers.

Post # 5
Member
3583 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

If she couldn’t afford it, she couldn’t afford it.  She did whatever she could to support you locally. And unless your friend offered her money to attend the wedding and she didn’t take it, I think her comment was a little childish, personally.

Post # 6
Member
3375 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I think it’s a bit different.

Be the better friend and go to her wedding. If you want to be in her wedding, then be in her wedding.

Post # 7
Member
701 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I totally would have said yes. She had a legitimate reason for not being in yours and I’m sure it was very hard for her to say no! If you were to say no to her out of spite I would consider that a terrible thing

Post # 9
Member
7174 posts
Busy Beekeeper

That’s silly of your friend to make that comment.  What purpose does not saying yes have – holding grudges over her as if to punish her for not being able to attend your DW?

If I was able to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man for a friend, I would do so, regardless of what they were able to do for me for my wedding.

Post # 10
Member
3618 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I would have done the same thing you did. You’re still good friends right? It’s not her fault she couldn’t afford to be in your wedding or even attend it since it was a destination wedding.

Post # 11
Member
9029 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

I would have said yes to her. Not being able to foward to part of a Destination Wedding is not a crime and doesnt mean she didnt want to be part of your wedding

Post # 12
Member
1361 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I would have said yes, absolutely! 

Post # 13
Member
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

@MissBoPeep:  agreed, different people, different circumstance. 

OP, Im glad you seem to see it that way as well

Post # 14
Member
996 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

You did the right thing and you are a good friend. She couldn’t afford to attend your wedding. I think its selfish for people to expect people to drop everything in their lives and spend a lot of money to travel lord knows where for there wedding. I’m not saying you felt that way-but some people do-and it rediculous.

Post # 15
Member
955 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

I would’ve said yes to her also.  DW’s can be expensive for guests, on top of the normal expense of Bridesmaid or Best Man.  So, she obviously showed that she cares for you by going to your shower and giving a gift, and by asking you to stand with her.

Post # 16
Member
6512 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

I think you totally made the right decision!  Not having enough money for something can be very hard, and it was good of you not to hold that against her.  Sound like you are a true friend 🙂

The topic ‘Asked my friend to be in my DW; she said No. She now asked me to be in hers?’ is closed to new replies.

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