- 7 years ago
- Wedding: December 2011
I apologize for the length but any advice would be appreciated.
I was friends with a girl in college. For the last two years there we pretty much spent all day together. We would get breaksfast, go to classes, study, go get dinner, shop on the weekends, were in the same clubs, shared hotel rooms, road tripped… everything.
Until I made my mistake (1 year ago), I backed out of my commitment for a presentation I was seriously overwhelmed. I did ask permission before hand if it was okay.. she said it was.. it wasn’t. I even offered that we both could back out and find 2 other people, she declined. A week later she stopped talking to me, I called her on it and said “you said this would be okay,” I offered to resume my commitment, because I seriously did not want this to get in the way. It did and she said she had it handled. Two weeks later I invited her to my graduation party, and she later invited me to hers but neither of us could go to each others.
After that I began calling her and texting inviting her places, she would call back and answer but never agreed and never made attempts to find another date/time.
Eventually she agreed to meet me for coffee. Where we basically broke up, seriously I gave her back her books I borrowed and she gave be back my dvds.
A long time passed maybe 6 or 7 months where no communication took place.
(3 months ago) I was at a job fair (where she now does grad school), and she came up and said hi for a while. I got her an interview but it didn’t work out. Regardless she got a job and recently got engaged.
We have been exchanging text messages since then, she has been initiating them, and we met for coffee once (1 month ago).
If had just sucked it up and done the presentation we probably still would have been friends through all this time and I would have without a doubt asked her to be my Maid/Matron of Honor.
I have already asked someone I am now super close with to be my Maid/Matron of Honor, and I have 2 BM’s that I already want to ask.
Should I ask her to be BM? I don’t want to ask someone that doesn’t really want to be my friend.
Should I ask her out to dinner/lunch before hand?