(Closed) Asking a friend to be a bridesmaid that you\'ve only known for 3 years

posted 4 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 2
1023 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2016

I didn’t, but I’m kind of regretting it! i met two girlfriends in the last couple years at a past job, that totally would have made the Bridesmaid or Best Man cut if I needed two more girls.

Post # 3
36 posts
  • Wedding: November 2016

I did! One of my bridesmaids is a friend I’ve only known about 3 years but I chose her because she is also good friends with my fiance and has always been extremely supportive and is one of my friends that I know I can always count on. One of my bridesmaids is also my friend/past roommate who I lived with for 5 years. I rarely see her anymore though because we live in different cities now. I chose my bridesmaids based on the relationships I have with them and the importance of each of these relationships.

Post # 4
3610 posts
Sugar bee

A friend of my FI’s recently asked my Fiance to be a groomsman in his wedding. He was apparently waffling back and forth about asking him because even though he really likes him and thinks they’ll be friends for the long term, he thought my Fiance would be weirded out by it because they’ve only been friends for a couple of years. Anyway, he decided he’d really regret not asking my Fiance and went for it. My Fiance wasn’t weirded out, he accepted, and everyone is happy.

I think you should go for it and ask her if that’s what you want to do.

Post # 5
3327 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

I dunno, 3 years is longer than a lot of people date their BF before getting engaged lol. I think 3 years is still kind of a long time.

Also it’s YOUR decision, not your FIs who is in your bridal party.


“I know most friends that become bridesmaids have been friends with the bride for years”

3 years is years…

Post # 6
6940 posts
Busy Beekeeper

I don’t see what the problem is unless your expectation is that once she’s a bridesmaid she will suddenly start making more time for you.  If you aren’t requiring any change in your usual contact, then it will be fine.  It’s all about expectations vs. reality.

  • This reply was modified 4 years, 4 months ago by  skunktastic.
Post # 7
1887 posts
Buzzing bee

I think the reason most brides choose friends they’ve known for a long time is that they want to pick people who they have reason to believe will continue to be in their lives for years to come. However, if you’ve been friends with someone for three years and feel like that bond is strong and expect it to continue, why not?

Post # 8
7367 posts
Busy Beekeeper

I fail to see why the amount of time you’ve known them really matters in the end. Lord knows people don’t speak to their blood family members and they have known them for a lifetime. Quality of quantity I say. if at this moment you feel like she has been a supportive friend why the hell not. Knowing someone for years doesn’t gurantee the friendship will continue. Look at all the she’s been my BF for 10/20+ years and now we barely talk or recognaize each other posts. Do what you feel in your heart is right. 

Post # 9
10645 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

All three of my bridesmaids are girls i’ve only known about 3 years. My bridesmaid has been my friend for over 15 though.

Post # 10
889 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2015

I don’t think 3 years is a short amount of time.

Post # 11
4316 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

I look at it as not only friends from your past but friends that you see being a part of your future! I say go for it! 

  • This reply was modified 4 years, 4 months ago by  Cheekie0077.
Post # 12
212 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

All 4 of FI’s groomsmen have only known Fiance (and me) for 2 years. But they pretty much spent those last 2 years seeing each other at least once a week. Not weird at all. 

I would say to pick the people that support you (will be supportive they day of and leading up to it) as well as someone that brings you up (makes you happy). 

Post # 13
688 posts
Busy bee

View original reply
camette:  My best friend is someone I met 3 years ago. All my other friends I also only met within the last 3 years. I am in dental school and had falling outs or lost touch with all my friends from prior to dental school. The amount of time you know someone isn’t equivalent to how close you are with them. And 3 years isn’t really that small of a time. 

Post # 14
701 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

I don’t think 3 years is that short of time at all. I know a girl who asked a friend to be her bridesmaid and they had only known each other for maybe 4 or 5 months at that point….now THAT was strange.

Post # 15
4453 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 2016


camette:  I did!  I actually only asked girls who I met after high school (except my sister of course!).  I’ve known one of my BMs for 3 years and she’s an incredible friend.  I definitely would’ve regretted not asking her 🙂

The topic ‘Asking a friend to be a bridesmaid that you\'ve only known for 3 years’ is closed to new replies.

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