(Closed) Asking bachelorette party guests to pay their own way…

posted 9 years ago in Parties
Post # 3
Member
8 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I’ve been to many bachelorette parties and don’t recall seeing an invitation that stated who is paying.  Some invites did state how much the entire night would be cause we rented a bus, hired a stripper, etc.  I think (and would hope) that people just know to pay for themselves.  I threw a party for my bf and we went to dinner, winery, and to the bars afterwards.  I didn’t mention anything about the cost and only included details about the plans.  At dinner everyone paid for themselves and I paid for my bf.  Hope that helps.

Post # 4
Member
536 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2018 - The Desmond Hotel in Malvern, PA

I think it’s pretty standard for guests to pay their own way (and for the bridesmaids to split the cost of the bride’s dinner/etc.) at a bachelorette, at least that’s what all the bachelorette parties I’ve been to have been like.  If you want to make it clear without being too blunt, maybe request that people bring cash so it’s easier to split the bill?  Or just mention that you have tried to choose venues for the party that will accommodate everyone’s budget.  Rather than saying "everyone has to pay for themselves" I think this will clue them in a bit more subtlely 🙂

Post # 5
Member
1428 posts
Bumble bee

I’ve always expected & for the most part paid my own way at a bachelorette party so I wouldn’t worry too much as I think that’s more the norm. The last one I attended as a Bridesmaid or Best Man & we just spread the word to everyone about bringing some cash as it made splitting the bill for dinner etc easier.

Post # 6
Member
2022 posts
Buzzing bee

I agree with Cupcake – usually people expect to pay their own way when attending a bachelorette.  If you are concerned people will think you are paying, erhaps after people RSVP, you could send an email to those who have said they are coming with an estimate for dinner or sending them a link to the restaurant’s menu?

Post # 7
Member
113 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

The bachelorette parties I’ve been to we all paid our own way, Or chipped in money for the limo/party bus/VIP table. I also think an evite is an okay way to go about the invites. They have SOOO many different themes and you can type out ALL the information and then the guests can see who is coming and who isn’t. I’m going to a bachelorette party in Tahoe this April and I’m from San Diego so it was so helpful to see who was going so I could call them and hitch a ride with them! (All of the girls live in the Bay Area)

Post # 9
Member
699 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

Humarockbride… Thanks! Those are awesome! I am sending the link to my sister/moh right now 🙂

Post # 10
Member
13 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: December 2009

When I threw a bachelorette party for my girlfriend, I included the costs on the invite as a courtesy so everyone knew what to expect. We planned several events for the evening and I especially wanted the out of town guests to know what things would cost. Plus, my co-host and I paid for part of the pole-dancing class and only asked for everyone to pitch in a small amount. The way I worded it on the invite was as follows: 

The Details: (date, time, location of events)

The Damage: (estimated cost for each portion of the night – dinner, pole dancing class, club/drinks)

What to Bring: (clothes for dancing, etc)

Post # 11
Member
365 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2009

One of my BMs totally stiffed the Maid/Matron of Honor for the bachelorette party AND shower… I felt so horrible, I ended up paying for half of my MOH’s dress.  Since the bachelorette party was really informal at my MOH’s house, everyone brought whatever (pizza, beer, daiquiris, etc), so she didn’t have to worry about the wording on the invite.  I just wish she hadn’t paid for so much of it herself… yeah, I have a lot of "bridal guilt"

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